32 Important English Phrases: advanced vocabulary lesson

Vanessa: Do you sometimes forget the words that you

want to say when you're having an English conversation?

Well never fear.

Today, I would like to help you learn 30 important expressions for daily conversation so that

you can easily express yourself and so that you can understand other people when they

speak.

Hi, I'm Vanessa from SpeakEnglishWithVanessa.com.

A few weeks ago you saw this lesson where my husband, Dan and I, answered your questions

about our third baby pregnancy.

It was a wonderful lesson where you got to immerse yourself in real conversation.

And today I would like to break down some of the key vocabulary that we used in that

conversation.

Like always, I have created a free PDF worksheet for you with all of today's important expressions

for daily conversation, the sample sentences, the definitions, and at the bottom of the

worksheet, you can answer Vanessa's challenge question so that you never forget what you've

learned.

You can click on the link below this video to download the free PDF worksheet today.

It is my gift to you.

All right, let's get started with the first expression that you heard in that conversation.

To scroll through.

In the conversation we said, "I scrolled through all of them here."

We're talking about all of the names.

This means that you're moving the information on the computer or on your phone so that you

can see more.

So you might say you should stop scrolling through social media and just take a walk

outside.

Dan: My process was to look at the most popular

names, the top 1,000 basically.

Vanessa: 1,000.

Dan: Yes.

I scrolled through all of them.

My process was to look at like the most popular names, the top 1,000 basically.

Vanessa: 1,000.

Dan: Yes.

I scrolled through all of them.

Vanessa: The next important daily life expression is

an interesting one.

What sold me on...

Was I buying something?

In the conversation I said, "What sold me on the name was the nickname, Tilly."

So we're choosing to name our third child, this girl Matilda, but there is a cute nickname,

Tilly.

So I said, "What sold me on the name was Tilly, the nickname."

Can you guess what this means?

It means what made me interested or excited about the name was the nickname.

I didn't buy something, but it made me excited.

When I heard the nickname, I thought, oh, that's so cute.

So you might say, what sold me on Vanessa's English lessons was her energy.

So here on YouTube, all of these lessons are free.

You don't have to purchase them, but you might say it got me interested and excited because

Vanessa has a lot of energy.

Even on days like today when I have a cough.

I think what sold me on the name was not so much the full name, but I really like the

nickname, which is Tilly.

I think what sold me on the name was not so much the full name, but I really like the

nickname, which is Tilly.

The next expression is to lag behind.

The name Matilda is very popular in other countries, but it is not popular in the US.

So we said, "I don't know why the US is lagging behind."

This means that they're moving slowly and they're not keeping up with the group.

Another way you could use this is this.

Since the pandemic, a lot of students are lagging behind in their education.

They're not up to the standard that there was before the pandemic.

I was so surprised.

So I don't know why the US is lagging behind, but we are here-

Dan: We always are.

Vanessa: ... bring back Matilda.

I was so surprised.

So I don't know why the US is lagging behind, but we are here-

Dan: We always are.

Vanessa: ... bring back Matilda.

The next expression is to grow on.

Am I talking about getting taller?

Here, in the conversation, we said, "The name Matilda has grown on me a lot."

Has grown on me?

Well, yes, there is a baby that is growing in me, but instead this expression to grow

on someone means that you like something more and more as time passes.

Maybe at the beginning you weren't sold on it, and then over time it grew on you.

So you might say, "I didn't want a dog, but when I saw that cute dog at the shelter, it

grew on me."

Your love for the dog grew and grew and you took it home.

Dan: Although I think I might call her Matilda

a lot.

Vanessa: Yeah, we've been calling her Matilda.

Dan: That name has grown on me quite a bit.

Although I think I might call her Matilda a lot.

Vanessa: Yeah, we've been calling her Matilda.

Dan: That name has grown on me quite a bit.

Vanessa: The next expression is it came down to.

We're not talking about literally going down somewhere.

Take a look at how it was used.

I said, "It came down to me thinking, well, would I miss out on something?"

Here we're talking about the decision to have a third child.

This was not a decision that we took lightly.

It was a very serious decision for us.

And in the end, my conclusion overall, it came down to the summary was, well, am I missing

out on something?

You only live once?

Right?

And this was the most important part of the decision for me.

So you could also say this, when we were deciding whether or not to start our own business,

it really came down to having a flexible life for our family.

So this business where I teach you English, it provides my family with a lot of flexibility.

I could make a lesson for you on Monday and then Tuesday go on a hike with my family.

Cool.

It's very flexible and that's what it came down to for us is the flexibility.

There's a lot more duties on me and run this business and take care of our other children.

So there's a lot of hesitation, but in the end, I think it came down to the question

of what if we chose not to?

There's a lot more duties on me and run this business and take care of our other children.

So there's a lot of hesitation.

But in the end, I think it came down to the question of what if we chose not to?

The next expression is to shoot for something.

Is this talking about a gun?

No.

Instead, look at how it was used in the conversation.

Dan asked me, "Were you shooting for a girl at all?

Were you shooting for a girl?"

Well, this question is talking about in my heart, was I dreaming about having a girl

and that was why I chose to have a third child, and the answer was no.

I was not shooting for a girl.

So what's this expression mean?

It's when you're trying or making an effort for something.

So in another context, we could say this.

When I started this YouTube channel, I wasn't shooting for 5 million subscribers.

But guess what?

Here we are.

Thank you.

I don't know.

Let's see.

Dan: Were you shooting for a girl at all?

Did you think about that?

Vanessa: You know what?

I did not think about the gender.

I don't know.

Let's see.

Dan: Were you shooting for a girl at all?

Did you think about that?

Vanessa: You know what?

I did not think about the gender.

The next expression is a very pregnancy related one, and it is trimester.

The first three letters, T-R-I mean three.

So we're talking about three segments, and here it's the three segments of pregnancy.

So in the conversation we said morning sickness is common in the first trimester, and then

in the second trimester they say usually you feel a little bit better.

Then in the third trimester where I am now, your body's just feeling very tired and ready

to be done with pregnancy.

So these are the three segments of pregnancy.

Morning sickness, which is when you feel nauseous.

During the first trimester, that was pretty similar.

I think it's just that everything happened sooner.

Morning sickness, which is when you feel nauseous during the first trimester, that was pretty

similar.

I think it's just that everything happened sooner.

The next expression is two for one.

We are going to compare surprise versus accident.

What do you think might be the difference between these two words?

In the conversation we explain that if you say, this baby is a surprise versus this baby

is an accident, there is a big difference between these two phrases.

The first one, this baby is a surprise, is very positive.

It means I wasn't planning to have a baby, but that's okay.

I'm happily surprised, but accident is much more negative.

If you say this baby was an accident, then it kind of feels like I didn't want this baby.

This is not really what I wanted with my life.

It's a much more negative feeling, and we can take that meaning to other situations

as well, not just pregnancy.

You might say, "I was so surprised when I found $20 on the street."

You get this is a positive thing.

Wow, I found free money.

What a great surprise.

But on the other hand, my brother-in-law messaged me the other day.

He said, "Sorry, it was an accident.

I bumped into your mailbox when I was backing out of your driveway.

Oops."

So this was a negative thing.

I don't want him to bump into my mailbox with his car, but he did.

At least he apologized and he said it was an accident.

He didn't want for that to happen, and he knows it's a negative thing.

Can you guess what it is?

Dan: Was she an accident or on purpose?

Vanessa: That's it.

That's one of the- Dan:

That's the rude way to say it.

Vanessa: Yeah.

So Gloria asked us in a very nice way.

She said, "Did you plan this baby or was it a surprise?"

Surprise is very positive words.

Dan: That's the nice way to-

Vanessa: Can you guess what it is?

Dan: Was she an accident or on purpose?

Vanessa: That's it.

That's one of the- Dan:

That's the rude way to say it.

Vanessa: Yeah.

So [inaudible 00:10:24] asked this in a very nice way.

She said, "Did you plan this baby or was it a surprise?"

Surprise is a very positive word.

Dan: That's the nice way to say it.

Vanessa: The next expression is another interesting

one, and it is to be put on the spot.

So in the conversation, Dan said that the question did you plan this baby is often a

rude question because it puts you on the spot.

You have to convey something very personal.

Did you want this baby?

Did you plan this baby?

This is a very personal thing, and in the conversation I said, it was no problem that

my students asked me this because I let them ask me anything.

But in general, this question can put you on the spot, make you feel uncomfortable or

nervous.

This is something that often happens in the classroom.

So you might say, "The teacher put me on the spot when she asked me about the reason for

World War II starting."

Ugh, I was not prepared for such a big difficult question.

She put me on the spot.

I might feel like, oh, they might think I don't love my child.

Dan: It puts you on the spot.

Vanessa: Yeah, it kind of feels like maybe you don't

care about your child as much as someone who plans their pregnancy.

I might feel like, oh, they might think I don't love my child.

Dan: It puts you on the spot.

Vanessa: Yeah, it kind of feels like maybe you don't

care about your child as much as someone who plans their pregnancy.

The next expression is, should you need.

Here, we're talking about giving birth outside of the hospital and we said, "The midwives

have all of the medical supplies should you or your baby need anything."

Should you need anything, they are prepared.

Here, we can just substitute the phrase, if you need anything, they are prepared, so we

could use it like this too.

Should you need more information, feel free to call or message me.

This is something that's really useful in the workplace.

You'll probably see people use this in writing or maybe in a voicemail if they tell you,

"Hey, here's some information, but should you need more information.

If you need more information, feel free to call or message me."

Both of these phrases are interchangeable.

But they have all of the emergency supplies.

Should your baby need oxygen, if you hemorrhage and you can't stop bleeding, they can help

you with all of that.

But they have all of the emergency supplies.

Should your baby need oxygen, if you hemorrhage and you can't stop bleeding, they can help

you with all of that.

The next expression is growing pains.

This can be very literal.

If you are a small child or if you're a teenager, that's when your body is growing a lot.

So you might experience literal growing pains.

I know that my five year old has told this to me that, "My legs are hurting today."

Oh, poor guy.

Well, his legs are growing.

He's getting taller.

Give him a little massage and he goes on his way.

But this is literal growing pains, but we use this in a more figurative way in the conversation.

We were talking about whether our two children would be jealous of the new baby, and we said,

"Well, there's always going to be growing pains."

When something changes in the family, it's always going to be a little bit difficult,

and that's just to be expected.

Usually this is used when something gets larger or bigger.

So for example, if you are growing your company or growing your business, well, there are

going to be some growing pains as you grow your business.

Maybe this means that you're going to miss something important or you're going to have

to stay up late at night.

You're going to hire the wrong person and have to fire them and find the right person.

This is normal and expected as something gets bigger and larger.

There's just some growing pains.

They are expecting her to be a cute little play thing.

I think it will become harder as she gets older and starts grabbing their things, like

it's always growing pains.

But they are expecting her to be a cute little play thing.

I think it will become harder as she gets older and starts grabbing their things, like

there's always growing pains.

The next expression is I've found that.

This is the reduced version of the full expression I have found that, and we're not talking about

something that's literally lost and found.

Instead, we're talking about your experience, something that you've learned.

So in the conversation I said, "I've found that having a newborn is okay, but having

a three year old is very tough."

So I am expecting that the difficulty when my baby's born will not be with the newborn,

but it will be mainly the common difficulties of having a three-year-old.

So nothing new, but this is to be expected.

You might also use this expression by saying something like this, "I've found that buying

higher quality items actually saves me money, even though they're more expensive because

they last longer."

Okay, this is something that you've learned.

I've found that.

In general, what I've found is that having a newborn is okay.

Having a three-year old is the problem.

In general, what I've found is that having a newborn is okay.

Having a three-year-old is the problem.

The next expression is to be set in stone, but we often use this in the negative version

like this.

It's not set in stone yet who will help with our baby.

A lot of you were concerned.

You're very kind about who will help with our children and our family after the baby's

born, and we gave some examples, but in the end we said, well, it's not set in stone yet.

That means it's not definite.

It's not for certain yet, but we have some options.

So you could also say related to English, your English future is not set in stone yet.

You can learn more, you can become fluent, but you have to decide to do it.

Dan: I believe my mom will be here for a while,

right?

Vanessa: We'll see how long a while is.

Dan: I don't think this is set in stone yet.

Vanessa: It's not.

Dan: I believe my mom will be here for a while,

right?

Vanessa: We'll see how long a while is.

Dan: I don't think this is set in stone yet.

Vanessa: It's not.

The next expression is to be sane.

You might know the expression insane, which is crazy.

Well, this is the opposite.

To be sane.

So in the conversation we said that having help with our children keeps us sane.

Having a babysitter come over and watch our children when we need a break keeps us sane.

This is important so that you can think rationally, think clearly, have a clear mind so that you

can be sane.

If you have a really busy job, you might say, my coworkers keep me sane during the day.

They're so funny, and we're always sharing funny pictures with each other online.

Okay, maybe your job is stressful, but what helps you to maintain a clear mind?

You're wonderful coworkers.

They keep you sane.

In the end, I'm not exactly sure what will happen this time, but we do have several babysitters

who help in our daily lives now so that I can film these videos and do my job.

Dan: And be sane.

Vanessa: And be sane.

Everyone needs help in their life.

In the end, I'm not exactly sure what will happen this time, but we do have several babysitters

who help in our daily lives now so that I can film these videos and do my job.

Dan: And be sane.

Vanessa: And be sane.

Everyone needs help in their life.

The next expression is to be taken care of, and because you are worried about who is going

to be taken care of us, we use this expression, "Don't worry, we will be taken care of."

This means that someone will be taking care of us.

Our neighbors will bring us food.

Our babysitters and family will help with our older children.

We will be taken care of.

Someone is going to be attending to our needs.

So you could also say, "Whenever we visit our family for the holidays, we are well taken

care of."

We often use the word well with this expression.

I was well taken care of when I visited my family for the holidays.

I didn't have to think about doing the dishes, making food, doing the laundry.

Really, everyone else did it all.

I was well taken care of.

If you want to give us something, please give us food.

Please make a meal and we can put it in our freezer.

I think that's the perfect gift.

So I think we will be taken care of I hope.

If you want to give us something, please give us food.

Please make a meal and we can put it in our freezer.

I think that's the perfect gift.

So I think we will be taken care of I hope.

The next expression is a little bit of a negative one.

It's not worth it.

So you are asking if the government provides any subsidies for families who have children,

and we said, not really.

There's a little bit of a tax benefit, but it's not worth it.

Here, I was explaining that yes, there is a little bit of a tax benefit, but the cost

of children is so much higher than that tax benefit that no one thinks that, oh, well,

at least I'm getting some government help.

No, it's not worth it.

That little bit of help is, yeah, it's not useful.

So you could also say in the US, for a lot of Americans, getting a university or college

degree is not worth it because you graduate with a lot of debt and you don't have any

skills for a particular job.

This is a really difficult part of American society right now that a lot of people think

their expensive degrees were not worth it.

Dan: You count them on your taxes and you probably

pay less taxes.

Vanessa: There's a little bit less taxes for each child,

but it's not much.

It's not worth it.

Dan: They certainly don't give you money.

You count them on your taxes and you probably pay less taxes.

Vanessa: There's a little bit less taxes for each child,

but it's not much.

It's not worth it.

Dan: They certainly don't give you money.

Vanessa: The next expression is a fun one, the short

end of a stick.

I wish I knew the origin of this expression.

If you know, please let me know in the comments, but here we're talking about something that's

just not fair.

So I said, when you're self-employed, like me, I run my own business, Speak English with

Vanessa.

I get the short end of the stick when it comes to aha, wonderful expression, when it comes

to health insurance, because we have to pay 100%.

I don't have a business who is paying half of it and then I pay the other half.

I have to pay all of it.

It's just not fair.

If you are the youngest in your family, you might use this expression quite often.

For my sister, she was always the youngest of our friend group, so she often said, "Hey,

I always get the short end of the stick.

Why do you get all the best toys and the best clothes and you can run faster than me?

That's not fair."

The short end of the stick, it's just not fair.

Your health insurance is much cheaper than someone like us.

Dan: Yeah.

We're not the best people to ask because we're self-employed.

Vanessa: Oh, and you get the short end of the stick.

Let me tell you why.

You got to pay the full price of health insurance.

You have to find your own health insurance independently.

Your health insurance is much cheaper than someone like us.

Dan: Yeah.

We're not the best people to ask because we're self employed.

Vanessa: Oh, and you get the short end of the stick.

Let me tell you why.

You got to pay the full price of health insurance.

You have to find your own health insurance independently.

The next expression is, that's what I thought.

Here you are emphatically agreeing with someone.

When we were talking about the overall cost of giving birth in the US in the hospital

system, Dan said, "Well, that's less than I thought."

And I agreed with him strongly.

That's what I thought.

So I am just showing him, yep.

I think so too.

So let's imagine that you're out to eat with your friends at a restaurant and you see your

friend at the end of the table doing something surprising.

You might whisper and say, "Hey, she's eating a steak.

Isn't she vegetarian?"

And your friend might say, "That's what I thought."

So here your friend is agreeing with you.

I thought she was a vegetarian, but look, she's eating a steak.

We are all surprised.

They had a C-section and they did not have insurance, and it cost $10,000, which is a

lot of money.

Dan: It's less than I would've expected.

Vanessa: But that's what I thought.

Yeah, I thought it would be like $100,000.

They had a C-section and they did not have insurance, and it cost $10,000, which is a

lot of money.

Dan: It's less than I would've expected.

Vanessa: But that's what I thought.

Yeah, I thought it would be like $100,000.

The next expression is out of the question.

We said four children is out of the question.

We have one child, two children.

Now three children, but four, four children is out of the question.

That means it is not a consideration.

We are not even thinking about it.

It is not going to happen.

A lot of people in the US right now, maybe in your country too, are saying this, buying

a house is out of the question.

The market is too expensive right now.

It is not a possibility.

Dan: I know it was already quite a push for you

to go with three.

So four is a bit- Vanessa:

If we- Dan:

As close to out of the question as possible.

So I know it was already quite a push for you to go with three.

So four is a bit- Vanessa:

If we- Dan:

As close to out of the question as possible.

Vanessa: So the next expression is actually two for

one.

We are going to compare the expression a nanny versus a babysitter.

This is possibly a regional difference or a cultural difference in the US.

But usually when we think of a nanny, we think of someone who provides full-time care for

your children.

So they come over in the morning, maybe 8:00, and they stay with your children until 5:00

when you come home from work.

This is full-time care.

So in the conversation, Dan said, "We could have a nanny, but we have some good babysitters."

So we don't have someone who comes and watches our children all day.

Instead, we have some babysitters and there is a gray area.

Some people might call themselves a nanny, and really they're a babysitter, but there's

a little bit of gray area.

In general, a babysitter is someone who provides short-term as needed care.

Maybe you call them and say, "Hey, we want to go on a date this weekend.

Can you watch our kids Saturday night?"

That's a babysitter.

Or maybe someone who watches your children two days a week.

For example, that's what we have.

We have someone who comes a few mornings per week for three hours so that I can record

these lessons for you and do other things, and this is a babysitter.

Now, that person might call themselves a nanny, and that's okay.

There's a little gray area, but in general, that's the difference.

A nanny is more long-term and longer care, and a babysitter is more short term or shorter

care.

I don't know.

Dan: Well, babysitters are pretty key.

We could have a nanny, honestly, but we have good babysitters already.

Vanessa: I don't know.

Dan: Well, babysitters are pretty key.

We could have a nanny, honestly, but we have good babysitters already.

Vanessa: The next expression is hours.

So you might be thinking, I know this.

Seconds, minutes, hours.

Well, really, this is a slightly different way to use this phrase.

In the conversation I said, "Dan has the same hours as our oldest son."

Is Dan a clock?

He has hours?

Nope.

Instead, I'm talking about the time that he works.

So he works during school hours and that's when our oldest son goes to school.

So it lines up perfectly.

You might say this about a restaurant.

I really like that restaurant, but they have weird hours.

Well, they're probably not open at the times that you want to go.

Maybe their hours are 3:00 to 5:00, Tuesday and Thursday.

Okay, that's really weird hours for a restaurant to have.

But this is talking about the time that people are working there or that they're available.

And Dan will be working at our oldest school.

Dan: Our oldest son's school.

Vanessa: Yes.

So he has the same hours, the same vacations.

And Dan will be working at our oldest school.

Dan: Our oldest son's school.

Vanessa: Yes.

So he has the same hours, the same vacations.

The next expression is whether you know it or not.

In the conversation I said, "There's a lot of people who help this business Speak English

with Vanessa to run, whether you know it or not."

So a lot of people do work behind the scenes, and this is the same for every business.

For example, if you watch a movie, you see the famous actors and you think those are

the people who help the movie to work.

But really there are thousands of people behind the scenes that make the movie happen.

So whether you know it or not, there are a lot of people who are helping you to learn

English.

10 or so people who participate in helping make this business run, help to edit videos,

help to- Dan:

She's got a real team now.

Vanessa: ... answer student questions.

All of this, whether you know it or not, there's a lot of work that goes into making this run.

So it's not just me.

10 or so people who participate in helping make this business run, help to edit videos,

help to- Dan:

She's got a real team now.

Vanessa: Answer student questions.

All of this.

Whether you know it or not, there's a lot of work that goes into making this run.

So it's not just me.

The next expression is worth of.

Okay, so we already talked about something not being worth it, but this is another way

to use this wonderful word worth.

In the conversation I said, "I'm trying to film four months worth of YouTube videos."

So I make a new video for you every Friday.

That's about four or five videos every month, and that means that over four months, that's

what?

About 12 to 15 free YouTube lessons that I'm creating for you in advance before my baby's

born.

Because after my baby's born, I guarantee I will not be able to teach or think for a

little while.

But here I'm using this expression worth of to talk about a group of something.

So you can use this expression to talk about money.

You might say it's a good idea to have six months worth of living expenses saved in your

bank account.

We call this an emergency fund.

This is just in case you lose your job.

Just in case your car breaks down.

In case there's some kind of emergency, you won't freak out too much because you have

six months worth of that group, that six months worth of finances or living expenses in your

bank account.

I'm filming a lot of YouTube videos, like four months worth of YouTube videos.

I have a lot of things prepared in advance.

I'm filming a lot of YouTube videos, like four months worth of YouTube videos.

I have a lot of things prepared in advance.

The next expression is to check in with.

We said that couples therapy is a good way for us to check in with each other each week.

Because you know what?

Life is busy.

You do your own things.

Maybe you spend a lot of time together, but you don't really get to connect as much with

each other.

So couples therapy is a good way for us to check in with each other.

This verb generally just means to get information from each other, but I think in a relationship

it has a little bit of a deeper meaning.

It's more to ask the important questions.

How are you really doing today?

You're checking in with someone, but you can also check in with someone on a more surface

level.

So you might say this in the workplace.

We scheduled a meeting to check in with the rest of the team to see how the project was

going.

Okay, you're not asking them, tell me how are you doing today?

Tell me about your deepest thoughts.

No, you're not digging deep.

You're just trying to simply get more information.

So you're trying to check in with each other.

Dan: We have a couple's therapist that we see every

week or every other week or so, and so that really helps us check in with each other.

We have a couple's therapist that we see every week or every other week or so, and so that

really helps us check in with each other.

Vanessa: The next expression is a fun one, on the brink

of something.

So usually we use this in a negative way.

So I said, you don't need to be on the brink of divorce to go to therapy.

So here we're talking about you can imagine a cliff's edge.

On the cliff's edge about to fall off and say goodbye to your relationship forever.

No, you don't need to be on the brink of divorce to go to therapy.

Really, it's useful for anyone at any place in their relationship.

You might hear this used in a positive way not to talk about the brink of divorce, the

brink of disaster, the brink of destruction.

These are the most common ways, but you might hear it used in a positive way potentially.

So for example, you might hear the inventor was on the brink of figuring out the solution

to the problem when his laboratory burned down.

Oh, no.

Okay, so he's about to discover something amazing, figure out the solution and something

bad happened.

But here, figuring out the discovery is something positive.

It's not the brink of disaster.

It's the brink of figuring out something.

So you might hear it used in that way, but you're more likely to hear it used in a negative

way.

So highly recommend talking with a couple's therapist.

For anyone who is in a relationship, you don't have to be on the brink of divorce to go see

a therapist.

Dan: You don't have to wait till then.

Vanessa: No, do not wait till then.

Highly recommend talking with a couple's therapist.

For anyone who is in a relationship, you don't have to be on the brink of divorce to go see

a parent.

Dan: You don't have to wait till then.

Vanessa: No, do not wait till then.

The next five final phrases for today's lesson are from the bonus section where we were giving

some advice to those of you who might be pregnant for the first time.

The first bonus phrase is in the picture.

Okay, so when you take a picture with your phone, if something is in the picture, you

can see it.

If it's outside of the picture, well, it's not going to be captured in the picture.

So this is kind of the figurative idea that we're talking about.

You might say, I hope that your partner, the person you had the baby with is in the picture.

This isn't always the case.

This means that you hope they're in your life, and I think that's the most common way to

use this.

You might say, when I was growing up, my mom wasn't in the picture, so I'm really close

to my dad and my sister.

This means that my mom wasn't in my life.

She wasn't in the picture.

You could use that for a partner.

My partner isn't in the picture.

He is in the picture or he wasn't, and now he is.

But we're using this to talk about someone who's in your life.

Dan: Your support person is extremely important.

So even if the partner's not in the picture, then you're going to need somebody who's like

super committed to being with you.

Your support person is extremely important.

So even if the partner's not in the picture, then you're going to need somebody who's like

super committed to being with you.

Vanessa: The next expression is to give some perspective.

There's two different grammatical ways that we can use this.

In the conversation, I said, talking with someone who has more children than you can

help to give some perspective, or you could use this in a different way.

Grammatically, add a little word here, and you could say, talking with someone who has

more children than you could help to give you some perspective.

So the word you hear is optional.

You will hear some people use it, some people not use it, and really it's just your choice.

Both of these are perfectly adequate options.

Talk to other people who have two or three children or more when you're pregnant with

your first child, because I think it helps to give some perspective, talk to other people

who have two or three children or more when you're pregnant with your first child, because

I think it helps to give some perspective.

The next bonus expression is to be grounding.

Grounding.

We're talking about the ground but not freely.

In the conversation, I said it can be really grounding to hear the advice of parents who

have multiple children.

The things that you are worried about, maybe they aren't worried about because they know

that those worries are not important.

So here it can help you to be more rational, more level-headed, and less anxious or erratic.

So here we're talking about their advice can be grounding.

It can be really helpful so that you don't feel too anxious.

So you might say, after I lost my first job, it was really grounding when my dad told me

about the time he lost a job, I was feeling really worried about losing the job.

I was having all these bad thoughts about myself.

I was really worried.

And then when my dad told me that he also lost a job, all of a sudden I thought, oh,

well, my dad's okay.

He made it.

Maybe I'll be okay too.

It was really grounding.

Parents who have 11 children, don't look at the crazy ones.

Look at people who seem pretty normal still, and it can be really grounding to see their

kind of advice.

Parents who have 11 children, don't look at the crazy ones.

Look at people who seem like pretty normal still, and it can be really grounding to see

their kind of advice.

The next bonus expression in our second to last expression of this lesson is to be your

best self.

You don't want to be your worst self, right?

So I recommended a book in the conversation and I said, if you read that book, it can

help you to be your best self after having a baby.

Because after you have a baby, the world is just a blur.

Everything is unknown.

So this book can help you to be your best self.

So we might even say learning English.

Maybe learning English with Vanessa helps me to be my best self.

I feel positive about English and I learn a lot.

I hope so.

I think this book would be extremely helpful to a third time mother or a first time mother

to help you be able to be your best self.

I think this book would be extremely helpful to a third time mother or a first time mother

to help you be able to be your best self.

The final bonus expression and the final expression of this entire lesson, congratulations, you

made it, is to be set up for.

This is a three part phrasal verb, to be set up for.

Wow.

So in the conversation we said, "Taking a birth class together sets you up for being

parents together."

It's not just the woman's duty to take the birth class and then be a parent after the

baby comes.

Nope.

You're going to parent together.

So taking a birth class together prepares you for that, and that's what this phrasal

verb means.

You could say taking a birth class prepares you for being parents together, or you could

level it up and use this wonderful phrasal verb.

Taking a birth class together sets you up for being parents together.

Dan: Yeah, you need to be prepared too.

Vanessa: Yeah, I think that kind of sets you up for

the birth, but it sets you up for being parents together.

Dan: Yeah, you need to be prepared too.

Vanessa: Yeah, I think that kind of sets you up for

the birth, but it sets you up for being parents together.

And having said that, I hope that this English lesson has set you up for English success

so that you can express yourself.

You can go out into the world and use these expressions with confidence.

Well, congratulations on immersing yourself in these top 30 important daily life expressions

so that you can really speak the words that you want to use when you have English conversations

and you can understand them when other people use them.

Don't forget to download the free PDF worksheet, which includes all of these wonderful expressions,

their definitions, sample sentences, and ideas about how you can use them so that you can

be set up for going out into the world and using them with confidence.

Well, thank you so much for learning English with me, and I'll see you again next Friday

for a new lesson here on my YouTube channel.

Bye.

But wait, do you want more?

I recommend watching this video next, the original conversation from this lesson where

you will find out the answer to the ultimate question.

Was this baby a surprise or was this baby a plan?

Find out in that video and I'll see you there.