IELTS Essay - How to Write an Introduction (Using Paraphrasing)

272,589 views ・ 2018-05-18

Oxford Online English


Please double-click on the English subtitles below to play the video.

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Hi, I’m Daniel.
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Welcome to Oxford Online English!
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In this lesson, you can learn about paraphrasing in IELTS essays.
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First question: what’s paraphrasing?
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Paraphrasing means saying the same thing in a different way.
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But, I’m guessing you already knew that.
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Probably, you’re watching this video because you think you need to paraphrase the question
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in your IELTS essay introduction, and you aren’t sure how to do it.
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We’re making this video because there’s a lot of bad or inaccurate advice about paraphrasing
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around, and many IELTS students have the wrong idea about what paraphrasing is and how they
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should use it in their IELTS essay.
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With our IELTS students, we often have to spend time breaking down bad habits and bad
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ideas which students have about this.
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So, in this lesson, you can learn the truth about paraphrasing in your IELTS essay.
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You’ll see the number one mistake that IELTS students make with paraphrasing, and you’ll
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learn how to use paraphrase effectively in your IELTS writing exam.
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Let’s start with something that might surprise you:
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What?
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But wait, I saw this video, and it said I should paraphrase the question in my introduction.
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But wait, I read this article, and it said I should paraphrase the question in my introduction.
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But wait, my teacher told me I should paraphrase the question in my introduction.
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Okay, we know.
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There’s a lot of IELTS advice out there that says, ‘paraphrase the question in your
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introduction.’
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Why should you listen when we say you don’t need to?
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Don’t pay attention to us; pay attention to the official IELTS scoring scheme.
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To save you time, we’ve added links to the official scoring scheme under the video.
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You can read it right now!
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Go ahead; read the scoring scheme and find the word ‘paraphrase’.
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We can save you some time: it isn’t there.
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Remember, this is the official scoring system, which the examiners use to mark your IELTS
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writing exam.
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The writing mark scheme does not talk about paraphrase AT ALL.
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Why not?
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Because you don’t have to paraphrase the question in your introduction.
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Okay, you think, so how do I start my essay?
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Surely paraphrasing the question is better than nothing?
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I don’t know what else to do…
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Here’s how a lot of students approach paraphrasing.
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See if this looks familiar to you.
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Let’s take a question:
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Robots, computers, and machines are becoming more advanced, and can perform many jobs which
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used to be done by people.
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What problems does this cause, and how can these problems be solved?
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So, let’s practice bad paraphrasing!
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Let’s see now, we need to change the words.
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Let’s find some synonyms:
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robot = automaton advanced = cutting-edge
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machine = apparatus job = assignment
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people = folks
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Wow, great synonyms, right?
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Let’s plug them into our sentence to create a bad paraphrase:
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Automata, computers, and apparatus are becoming more cutting-edge, and can perform many assignments
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which used to be done by folks.
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Let’s change a couple of small things so it’s not so close to the original:
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Automata, computers, and apparatus are more and more cutting-edge, and can do many assignments
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which were done by folks in the past.
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Finished!
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What a great paraphrase!
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No, no, no!
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This is terrible, and it will only hurt your IELTS score.
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Don’t do this!
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This is what many IELTS students do, but it’s a bad idea.
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Let’s see why this doesn’t work.
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First, a question: what’s a synonym?
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You probably said something like, “a word with the same meaning as another word.”
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That’s more or less true.
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However, a true synonym is a word which can replace another word in any sentence.
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So, imagine you have two words: A and B.
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If word A can be replaced with word B in any sentence, they’re synonyms.
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If word A can be replaced with word B sometimes, but not always, they’re not true synonyms.
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Maybe they have a similar meaning, but they aren’t the same.
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What’s the point of all this?
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The point is that there are very few true synonyms in English, or any language.
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Just because two words have the same meaning does not mean they can be used in the same
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way.
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The words people and folks have the same basic meaning, but that doesn’t mean that you
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can say folks any time you say people.
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They aren’t true synonyms.
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Why not?
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Because vocabulary usage depends on more than just meaning.
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Register and collocation are equally important.
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Also, many words which have a similar meaning don’t have exactly the same meaning.
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Machine and apparatus are similar, but they aren’t the same.
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Job and assignment are similar, but they aren’t the same.
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So, that’s problem number one.
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When you use words that you think are synonyms, they probably aren’t true synonyms.
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That means you’re changing the meaning—which is dangerous—and also making language mistakes,
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which can hurt your vocabulary score.
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There’s a second problem: this is a really weird and unnatural thing to do.
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Imagine someone asks you a question.
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What do you do?
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Do you repeat the question back, using different words?
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Hey!
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How was your weekend?
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Ah…
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You wish to enquire about my recent non-working days?
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How’s the weather in the US?
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So…
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You want to know about the climatic conditions in North America?
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No!
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This is weird!
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When someone asks you a question, you answer the question.
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Your IELTS essay is the same.
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The task asks you a question.
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Your essay should answer the question.
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Your answer starts from your first sentence.
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Bad paraphrase adds nothing to your answer.
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No paraphrase is better than bad paraphrase.
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A bad paraphrase is only an empty sentence with language mistakes.
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That’s all the examiner will see.
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For your IELTS score, this is only negative.
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Ok, you think, so how do I start my essay?
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You have two options, and it depends on your target score.
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Let’s look.
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This is going to be a short section.
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If your target score is 6 or maybe 6.5, and you don’t know how to start your essay,
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here’s what you do:
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Write an introduction which is one sentence.
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Write a thesis statement.
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That means you explain what you’re going to talk about and what you’re trying to
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prove with your essay.
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For example:
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In this essay, I will discuss possible solutions to the problems caused by robots and computers
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taking people’s jobs.
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Or: I intend to show that the problems caused by robots and computers taking people’s
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jobs are serious, but also possible to solve.
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Or even: Robots and computers are replacing people at work.
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This is a serious problem, and I will discuss how we can solve it.
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That’s all you need.
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But, you say, isn’t that too short?
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No—not at all.
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First of all, your introduction can be any length.
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Your introduction can be one sentence.
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Here’s an important point: your introduction is the least important part of your IELTS
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essay.
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Are the example introductions you saw above great?
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No.
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They’re not great, but they are easily good enough.
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Your conclusion is super-important.
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How you organise your ideas into paragraphs is very important.
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How you support and connect your ideas is extremely important.
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Your introduction is not that important.
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You can get a high score with a very basic introduction.
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So, here’s a simple solution: if you don’t know what to write in your IELTS essay introduction,
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don’t write much at all.
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Write a short thesis statement, and then start the body of your essay.
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This is good advice if your target is 6 or 6.5, but what if you’re aiming for a higher
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score?
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So, what does effective paraphrase look like?
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Remember, you’re thinking about writing a strong IELTS essay here.
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That means an essay which scores between seven and nine.
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Here’s the thing: when you write a strong essay, you can’t think about it as lots
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of separate things.
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Lots of IELTS students write essays in this way: “Ok, first I have to paraphrase the
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question, then I need to write a thesis statement.
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Ok, first body paragraph: I need a topic sentence, then a supporting example, then a linking
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phrase, then a second supporting example… et cetera.”
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That can work for intermediate IELTS scores: 5.5 to 6.5, but it’s not a good approach
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for higher scores.
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For higher scores, your essay needs to be one coherent, connected piece.
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What does that mean, practically?
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And what does it have to do with paraphrasing?
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First point: your first sentence should be connected to everything else in your essay.
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That means you need to know exactly where your essay is going before you start writing.
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Before you put one word on the page, you need to know all the important things you want
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to say.
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Practically, that means you need to know what your conclusion is going to be before you
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start writing.
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You also need to know exactly how many body paragraphs you’re going to have, and what
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you’re going to put in each one.
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To be clear, that means when you write your first sentence, you aren’t just thinking,
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“How can I find a synonym for this word?”
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Good paraphrasing isn’t about that.
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You already know the conclusion you want to reach, and you know the ideas you want to
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discuss.
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Effective paraphrasing includes this.
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It shows your reader—the examiners—where your essay is going.
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Effective paraphrasing shows how you understand the key ideas in the question, and what conclusion
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your essay is trying to reach.
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So, the main point: paraphrasing depends on planning.
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It’s not a simple thing; it’s not just taking some words and replacing them with
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other words—it’s connected to other parts of your essay.
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It’s connected to your ideas and opinions.
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If you don’t know the conclusion of your essay, you can’t write a good introduction.
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To write a good introduction, you need to know exactly where you’re trying to go.
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Let’s see how this can work in practice.
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To paraphrase effectively, you need to take the ideas in the question and add your own
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interpretation.
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Here’s the question you saw before: Some questions:
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The question talks about robots, computers, and machines.
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What do these words mean in this context?
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Can you think of specific examples?
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What exactly does advanced mean?
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Advanced in what way?
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The question mentions jobs which used to be done by people.
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Like what?
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The question asks: what problems does this cause?
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Are these problems serious, or not?
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Why or why not?
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Pause the video and think about these.
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If you want to write a good introduction, you need to have clear answers to all of these
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questions!
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Now, let’s see how you could effectively paraphrase this question:
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Advances in technology have led to the automation of many jobs, especially low-level or manual
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positions.
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This has led to many serious problems, including unemployment and increasing rates of poverty
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and inequality.
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This is what a good paraphrase looks like.
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Here’s a question: which way do you think this essay is going?
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Do you think the writer will be positive, negative or neutral about the effects of automation?
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It sounds negative.
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You can guess that the essay will conclude that automation causes serious problems which
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are not easy to solve.
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Someone who reads the first sentence of your introduction should be able to do the same
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thing; they should be able to guess where your essay is going.
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Remember: this starts in your head.
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Everything needs to be clear in your head before you write anything.
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Another point to notice: our paraphrase doesn’t have the same sentence structure as the task.
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The paraphrase is two sentences, while the task is just one.
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The task asks a question: “What problems does this cause?”
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Our paraphrase replaces this with a statement: “This has led to many serious problems.”
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Also, our paraphrase replaces general ideas in the question with more specific ideas.
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The question mentions “many jobs,” but our paraphrase talks about “low-level or
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manual positions.”
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The question mentions “problems,” but our paraphrase talks about “serious problems,
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including unemployment and inequality.”
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To review, to write an effective paraphrase, you need to do three things:
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One: have a clear plan in your head, with a clear conclusion, which should be obvious
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to your reader from the first sentence of your essay.
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Two: don’t try to stick too closely to the sentence structure in the question.
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Paraphrasing is about ideas, not just words.
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Three: interpret and develop the ideas in the task, so that you replace general ideas
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in the task with your own more specific ones.
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Now, you should understand more about how to paraphrase in your IELTS essay.
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Good luck if you have an IELTS exam coming up soon!
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You can find more free English lessons, including IELTS preparation lessons, on our website:
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Oxford Online English dot com.
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Thanks for watching!
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See you next time!
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