How to communicate effectively & GET RESULTS!

609,392 views ใƒป 2019-04-06

English with Ronnie


์•„๋ž˜ ์˜๋ฌธ์ž๋ง‰์„ ๋”๋ธ”ํด๋ฆญํ•˜์‹œ๋ฉด ์˜์ƒ์ด ์žฌ์ƒ๋ฉ๋‹ˆ๋‹ค. ๋ฒˆ์—ญ๋œ ์ž๋ง‰์€ ๊ธฐ๊ณ„ ๋ฒˆ์—ญ๋ฉ๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.

00:00
Hello.
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์•ˆ๋…•ํ•˜์„ธ์š”.
00:01
My name's Ronnie.
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์ œ ์ด๋ฆ„์€ ๋กœ๋‹ˆ์ž…๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
00:03
Are you a mother or a father, or a teacher or someone?
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๋‹น์‹ ์€ ์–ด๋จธ๋‹ˆ์ž…๋‹ˆ๊นŒ, ์•„๋ฒ„์ง€์ž…๋‹ˆ๊นŒ, ์„ ์ƒ๋‹˜์ž…๋‹ˆ๊นŒ, ๋ˆ„๊ตฐ๊ฐ€์ž…๋‹ˆ๊นŒ?
00:08
Are you someone?
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๋‹น์‹ ์€ ๋ˆ„๊ตฐ๊ฐ€์ž…๋‹ˆ๊นŒ?
00:09
Are you a human?
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๋‹น์‹ ์€ ์ธ๊ฐ„์ž…๋‹ˆ๊นŒ?
00:10
Me too.
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์ €๋„์š”.
00:12
I want to tell you something that's really, really cool and amazing.
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์ •๋ง ์ •๋ง ๋ฉ‹์ง€๊ณ  ๋†€๋ผ์šด ์‚ฌ์‹ค์„ ๋ง์”€๋“œ๋ฆฌ๊ณ  ์‹ถ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค .
00:17
The way that we speak to students or the way that you speak to children or even other people,
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์šฐ๋ฆฌ๊ฐ€ ํ•™์ƒ๋“ค์—๊ฒŒ ๋งํ•˜๋Š” ๋ฐฉ์‹ ๋˜๋Š” ์—ฌ๋Ÿฌ๋ถ„์ด ์•„์ด๋“ค์ด๋‚˜ ์‹ฌ์ง€์–ด ๋‹ค๋ฅธ ์‚ฌ๋žŒ๋“ค์—๊ฒŒ ๋งํ•˜๋Š” ๋ฐฉ์‹,
00:25
if you're a boss or you are a manager of someone or of a company - it's very, very important
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๋งŒ์•ฝ ๋‹น์‹ ์ด ์ƒ์‚ฌ์ด๊ฑฐ๋‚˜ ๋ˆ„๊ตฐ๊ฐ€ ๋˜๋Š” ํšŒ์‚ฌ์˜ ๊ด€๋ฆฌ์ž๋ผ๋ฉด
00:34
the way that you speak to people because if you are very direct with people, they will
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์‚ฌ๋žŒ๋“ค์—๊ฒŒ ๋งํ•˜๋Š” ๋ฐฉ์‹์€ ๋งค์šฐ ๋งค์šฐ ์ค‘์š”ํ•ฉ๋‹ˆ๋‹ค. ์™œ๋ƒํ•˜๋ฉด ๋‹น์‹ ์ด ์‚ฌ๋žŒ๋“ค์—๊ฒŒ ๋งค์šฐ ์ง์ ‘์ ์ด๋ผ๋ฉด ๊ทธ๋“ค์€
00:41
not respond to you, and they will close down, they will lose their confidence, and they
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๋‹น์‹ ์—๊ฒŒ ์‘๋‹ตํ•˜์ง€ ์•Š์„ ๊ฒƒ์ด๊ณ  ๊ทธ๋“ค์€ ๋ฌธ์„ ๋‹ซ์„ ๊ฒƒ์ด๊ณ  ๊ทธ๋“ค์€ ์ž์‹ ๊ฐ์„ ์žƒ์„ ๊ฒƒ์ด๊ณ 
00:48
will not do what you need them to do.
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๋‹น์‹ ์ด ๊ทธ๋“ค์—๊ฒŒ ์š”๊ตฌํ•˜๋Š” ๊ฒƒ์„ ํ•˜์ง€ ์•Š์„ ๊ฒƒ์ด๊ธฐ ๋•Œ๋ฌธ์ž…๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
00:52
I'm a teacher.
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๋‚˜๋Š” ์„ ์ƒ๋‹˜์ด๋‹ค.
00:54
Surprise.
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๋†€๋ผ๋‹ค.
00:56
And in a classroom, there is certain language that you can use to help students motivate them...
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๊ทธ๋ฆฌ๊ณ  ๊ต์‹ค์—๋Š” ํ•™์ƒ๋“ค์ด ๋™๊ธฐ๋ฅผ ๋ถ€์—ฌํ•˜๋Š” ๋ฐ ์‚ฌ์šฉํ•  ์ˆ˜ ์žˆ๋Š” ํŠน์ • ์–ธ์–ด๊ฐ€ ์žˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค...
01:03
To help motivate students, and there's also certain language that you can use with children
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ํ•™์ƒ๋“ค์—๊ฒŒ ๋™๊ธฐ๋ฅผ ๋ถ€์—ฌํ•˜๊ธฐ ์œ„ํ•ด ์‚ฌ์šฉํ•  ์ˆ˜ ์žˆ๋Š” ํŠน์ • ์–ธ์–ด๊ฐ€ ์žˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค. ์•„์ด๋“ค
01:09
or with employees to help motivate them or encourage them.
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์ด๋‚˜ ์ง์›์—๊ฒŒ ๋™๊ธฐ๋ฅผ ๋ถ€์—ฌํ•˜๊ฑฐ๋‚˜ ๊ฒฉ๋ คํ•˜๊ธฐ ์œ„ํ•ด ์‚ฌ์šฉํ•  ์ˆ˜ ์žˆ๋Š” ํŠน์ • ์–ธ์–ด๋„ ์žˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
01:13
So, what I'm going to teach you today is English phrases that you probably use, and maybe they're
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๊ทธ๋ž˜์„œ ์ œ๊ฐ€ ์˜ค๋Š˜ ์—ฌ๋Ÿฌ๋ถ„์—๊ฒŒ ๊ฐ€๋ฅด์ณ ๋“œ๋ฆด ๊ฒƒ์€ ์—ฌ๋Ÿฌ๋ถ„์ด ์•„๋งˆ ์‚ฌ์šฉํ•˜๊ณ 
01:22
not getting the results that you need in your place of work, at home with children, or in
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์ง์žฅ์—์„œ, ์•„์ด๋“ค์ด ์žˆ๋Š” ์ง‘์—์„œ, ๋˜๋Š”
01:27
a classroom.
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๊ต์‹ค์—์„œ ํ•„์š”ํ•œ ๊ฒฐ๊ณผ๋ฅผ ์–ป์ง€ ๋ชปํ•  ์ˆ˜๋„ ์žˆ๋Š” ์˜์–ด ํ‘œํ˜„๋“ค์ž…๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
01:29
And the reason why is it's because how people react to what you say.
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๊ทธ ์ด์œ ๋Š” ์‚ฌ๋žŒ๋“ค์ด ๋‹น์‹ ์˜ ๋ง์— ์–ด๋–ป๊ฒŒ ๋ฐ˜์‘ํ•˜๊ธฐ ๋•Œ๋ฌธ์ž…๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
01:34
If someone throws you negative energy, you're not going to respond very well to them.
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๋ˆ„๊ตฐ๊ฐ€๊ฐ€ ๋‹น์‹ ์—๊ฒŒ ๋ถ€์ •์ ์ธ ์—๋„ˆ์ง€๋ฅผ ๋˜์ง€๋ฉด ๋‹น์‹ ์€ ๊ทธ๋“ค์—๊ฒŒ ์ž˜ ๋ฐ˜์‘ํ•˜์ง€ ์•Š์„ ๊ฒƒ์ž…๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
01:40
For example, if you're upset and someone says: -"Just relax.
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์˜ˆ๋ฅผ ๋“ค์–ด, ๋‹น์‹ ์ด ํ™”๊ฐ€ ๋‚ฌ์„ ๋•Œ ๋ˆ„๊ตฐ๊ฐ€๊ฐ€ "์ง„์ •ํ•˜์„ธ์š”.
01:47
Don't worry."
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๊ฑฑ์ •ํ•˜์ง€ ๋งˆ์„ธ์š”."๋ผ๊ณ  ๋งํ•œ๋‹ค๋ฉด.
01:48
-"Don't tell me to relax.
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-"์ง„์ •ํ•˜๋ผ๊ณ  ํ•˜์ง€๋งˆ.
01:49
I'm angry."
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๋‚˜ ํ™”๋‚ฌ์–ด."
01:50
The worst thing you can do is tell someone to relax, because it makes it worse.
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๋‹น์‹ ์ด ํ•  ์ˆ˜ ์žˆ๋Š” ์ตœ์•…์˜ ์ผ์€ ๋‹ค๋ฅธ ์‚ฌ๋žŒ์—๊ฒŒ ๊ธด์žฅ์„ ํ’€๋ผ๊ณ  ๋งํ•˜๋Š” ๊ฒƒ์ž…๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
01:55
So, I'm going to go through some harsh phrases and how to make them softer to encourage people
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๊ทธ๋ž˜์„œ ๋ช‡ ๊ฐ€์ง€ ๊ฑฐ์นœ ํ‘œํ˜„์„ ์‚ดํŽด๋ณด๊ณ  ์‚ฌ๋žŒ๋“ค์ด ์›ํ•˜๋Š” ๊ฒƒ์„ ํ•˜๋„๋ก ๊ฒฉ๋ คํ•˜๊ธฐ ์œ„ํ•ด ๋ถ€๋“œ๋Ÿฝ๊ฒŒ ๋งŒ๋“œ๋Š” ๋ฐฉ๋ฒ•์„ ์‚ดํŽด๋ณด๊ฒ ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค
02:03
to get them to do what you want.
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.
02:05
"Manipulation" is another word.
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"์กฐ์ž‘"์€ ๋˜ ๋‹ค๋ฅธ ๋‹จ์–ด์ž…๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
02:08
So, as a teacher, I know that sometimes students do not understand something.
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๊ทธ๋ž˜์„œ ๊ต์‚ฌ๋กœ์„œ ์ €๋Š” ๋•Œ๋•Œ๋กœ ํ•™์ƒ๋“ค์ด ๋ฌด์–ธ๊ฐ€๋ฅผ ์ดํ•ดํ•˜์ง€ ๋ชปํ•œ๋‹ค๋Š” ๊ฒƒ์„ ์••๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
02:15
Now, I know because of their faces; they have a blank stare, or they look around, or they
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์ด์ œ ๋‚˜๋Š” ๊ทธ๋“ค์˜ ์–ผ๊ตด ๋•Œ๋ฌธ์— ์••๋‹ˆ๋‹ค. ๊ทธ๋“ค์€ ๋ฉํ•˜๋‹ˆ ์ณ๋‹ค๋ณด๊ฑฐ๋‚˜ ์ฃผ์œ„๋ฅผ ๋‘˜๋Ÿฌ๋ณด๊ฑฐ๋‚˜
02:22
look at the ground.
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๋•…์„ ์ณ๋‹ค๋ด…๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
02:24
So, as a teacher, you say: "Okay.
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๊ทธ๋ž˜์„œ ๊ต์‚ฌ๋กœ์„œ ๋‹น์‹ ์€ ์ด๋ ‡๊ฒŒ ๋งํ•ฉ๋‹ˆ๋‹ค. "์•Œ๊ฒ ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
02:27
Do you have any questions?"
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์งˆ๋ฌธ์ด ์žˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๊นŒ?"
02:29
And, of course, you are shy.
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๊ทธ๋ฆฌ๊ณ  ๋ฌผ๋ก , ๋‹น์‹ ์€ ๋ถ€๋„๋Ÿฌ์›Œํ•ฉ๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
02:34
You don't want to ask the teacher a question.
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๋‹น์‹ ์€ ์„ ์ƒ๋‹˜์—๊ฒŒ ์งˆ๋ฌธํ•˜๊ณ  ์‹ถ์ง€ ์•Š์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
02:37
Maybe you will look stupid if you ask the teacher a question.
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์„ ์ƒ๋‹˜๊ป˜ ์งˆ๋ฌธ์„ ํ•˜๋ฉด ๋ฐ”๋ณด์ฒ˜๋Ÿผ ๋ณด์ผ์ง€๋„ ๋ชฐ๋ผ์š” .
02:41
So, teachers, instead of saying: "Do you have any questions?" and waiting in silence, it
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๋”ฐ๋ผ์„œ ๊ต์‚ฌ๋Š” "์งˆ๋ฌธ์ด ์žˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๊นŒ? "๋ผ๊ณ  ๋งํ•˜๋Š” ๋Œ€์‹ ์— " ์งˆ๋ฌธ์ด ์žˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๊นŒ?" ๊ทธ๋ฆฌ๊ณ  ์กฐ์šฉํžˆ ๊ธฐ๋‹ค๋ฆฌ๋ฉด์„œ ์ด๋ ‡๊ฒŒ
02:49
would be better to say: "I'm here to help.
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๋งํ•˜๋Š” ๊ฒƒ์ด ๋” ๋‚˜์„ ๊ฒƒ์ž…๋‹ˆ๋‹ค
02:52
Please ask me."
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.
02:55
It's the same thing if you are in a job, or you are the manager of someone, or you are
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๋‹น์‹ ์ด ์ง์žฅ์— ์žˆ๊ฑฐ๋‚˜ ๋ˆ„๊ตฐ๊ฐ€์˜ ๋งค๋‹ˆ์ €์ด๊ฑฐ๋‚˜ ๋‹น์‹ ์ด
03:04
the boss of someone.
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๋ˆ„๊ตฐ๊ฐ€์˜ ์ƒ์‚ฌ๋ผ๋ฉด ๋งˆ์ฐฌ๊ฐ€์ง€์ž…๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
03:06
Instead of saying: "Do you have any questions?" you can be nice and say: "I'm here to help
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"์งˆ๋ฌธ์ด ์žˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๊นŒ?"๋ผ๊ณ  ๋งํ•˜๋Š” ๋Œ€์‹  ๋‹น์‹ ์€ ์ƒ๋ƒฅํ•˜๊ฒŒ "๋‚˜๋Š” ๋‹น์‹ ์„ ๋•๊ธฐ ์œ„ํ•ด ์—ฌ๊ธฐ ์žˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค
03:09
you, so please ask me questions.
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. ๊ทธ๋Ÿฌ๋‹ˆ ์ €์—๊ฒŒ ์งˆ๋ฌธ์„ ํ•ด์ฃผ์„ธ์š”.
03:12
Feel free to ask me questions."
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์ž์œ ๋กญ๊ฒŒ ์งˆ๋ฌธํ•˜์„ธ์š”."๋ผ๊ณ  ๋งํ•  ์ˆ˜ ์žˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
03:14
This makes you more approachable.
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์ด๊ฒƒ์€ ๋‹น์‹ ์„ ๋” ์ ‘๊ทผํ•˜๊ธฐ ์‰ฝ๊ฒŒ ๋งŒ๋“ญ๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
03:17
"Approachable" means easier to talk to, because you need to make sure that the people respect
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"์ ‘๊ทผ ๊ฐ€๋Šฅ"์€ ์‚ฌ๋žŒ๋“ค์ด ๋‹น์‹ ์„ ์กด์ค‘ํ•˜๋Š”์ง€ ํ™•์ธํ•ด์•ผ ํ•˜๊ธฐ ๋•Œ๋ฌธ์— ๋Œ€ํ™”ํ•˜๊ธฐ๊ฐ€ ๋” ์‰ฝ๋‹ค๋Š” ๊ฒƒ์„ ์˜๋ฏธํ•ฉ๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
03:23
you, and then you can have a good relationship, whether it be in the classroom, at a job,
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๊ทธ๋Ÿฌ๋ฉด ๊ต์‹ค์—์„œ๋“ , ์ง์žฅ์—์„œ๋“ ,
03:29
or with your children, or anyone really.
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์ž๋…€ ๋˜๋Š” ๋ˆ„๊ตฌ์™€๋“  ๊ด€๊ณ„์—†์ด ์ข‹์€ ๊ด€๊ณ„๋ฅผ ์œ ์ง€ํ•  ์ˆ˜ ์žˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
03:32
"Why don't you understand?
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"์™œ ์ดํ•ด๋ฅผ ๋ชปํ•ด์š”?
03:35
Oh my god, you're so stupid."
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์˜ค ๋งˆ์ด ๊ฐ“, ๋‹น์‹ ์€ ๋„ˆ๋ฌด ๋ฐ”๋ณด์ž…๋‹ˆ๋‹ค."
03:39
So, obviously there is a problem; maybe with instructions, or language, or communication.
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๋”ฐ๋ผ์„œ ๋ถ„๋ช…ํžˆ ๋ฌธ์ œ๊ฐ€ ์žˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค. ์ง€์นจ, ์–ธ์–ด ๋˜๋Š” ์˜์‚ฌ ์†Œํ†ต์ด ์žˆ์„ ์ˆ˜ ์žˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
03:48
Instead of asking the person: "Why don't you understand?" because they don't know why they
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๊ทธ ์‚ฌ๋žŒ์—๊ฒŒ "์™œ ์ดํ•ดํ•˜์ง€ ๋ชปํ•ฉ๋‹ˆ๊นŒ ? "๋ผ๊ณ  ๋ฌป๋Š” ๋Œ€์‹ ์—. ๊ทธ๋“ค์ด ์ดํ•ดํ•˜๋Š” ์ด์œ ๋ฅผ ๋ชจ๋ฅด๊ธฐ ๋•Œ๋ฌธ์—
03:53
understand, you could say something like: "Oh, hey.
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๋‹ค์Œ๊ณผ ๊ฐ™์ด ๋งํ•  ์ˆ˜ ์žˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค. "์˜ค, ์ด๋ด.
03:57
Let me show you again."
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๋‚ด๊ฐ€ ๋‹ค์‹œ ๋ณด์—ฌ์ค„๊ฒŒ."
03:59
Or: "Let me tell you again how to do it."
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๋˜๋Š” "๋ฐฉ๋ฒ•์„ ๋‹ค์‹œ ์•Œ๋ ค ๋“œ๋ฆฌ๊ฒ ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค."
04:02
Again, you're taking the person and making them help you.
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๋‹ค์‹œ ๋งํ•˜์ง€๋งŒ, ๋‹น์‹ ์€ ๊ทธ ์‚ฌ๋žŒ์„ ๋ฐ๋ ค๊ฐ€์„œ ๊ทธ๋“ค์ด ๋‹น์‹ ์„ ๋•๋„๋ก ๋งŒ๋“ค๊ณ  ์žˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
04:07
You want to help the person.
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๋‹น์‹ ์€ ๊ทธ ์‚ฌ๋žŒ์„ ๋•๊ณ  ์‹ถ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
04:09
You don't want the person to feel stupid or feel not good about themselves; you want to
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๋‹น์‹ ์€ ๊ทธ ์‚ฌ๋žŒ์ด ์–ด๋ฆฌ์„๋‹ค๊ณ  ๋Š๋ผ๊ฑฐ๋‚˜ ์ž์‹ ์— ๋Œ€ํ•ด ์ข‹์ง€ ์•Š๊ฒŒ ๋Š๋ผ๊ธฐ๋ฅผ ์›ํ•˜์ง€ ์•Š์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
04:16
encourage people in a classroom, you want to encourage your children to learn.
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๊ต์‹ค์—์„œ ์‚ฌ๋žŒ๋“ค์„ ๊ฒฉ๋ คํ•˜๊ณ  ์‹ถ๊ณ  ์ž๋…€๊ฐ€ ๋ฐฐ์šฐ๋„๋ก ๊ฒฉ๋ คํ•˜๊ณ  ์‹ถ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
04:21
As soon as you stop doing that, people shut off; they don't want to learn from you, they
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๋‹น์‹ ์ด ๊ทธ ์ผ์„ ๋ฉˆ์ถ”๋Š” ์ˆœ๊ฐ„ ์‚ฌ๋žŒ๋“ค์€ ์ž…์„ ๋‹ค๋ฌผ ๊ฒƒ์ž…๋‹ˆ๋‹ค. ๊ทธ๋“ค์€ ๋‹น์‹ ์—๊ฒŒ์„œ ๋ฐฐ์šฐ๊ธฐ๋ฅผ ์›ํ•˜์ง€ ์•Š์œผ๋ฉฐ
04:25
don't want to take guidance from you, especially in a job.
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ํŠนํžˆ ์ง์žฅ์—์„œ ๋‹น์‹ ์—๊ฒŒ์„œ ์ง€๋„๋ฅผ ๋ฐ›๊ณ  ์‹ถ์–ดํ•˜์ง€ ์•Š์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค . ๊ด€๋ฆฌ์ž
04:29
You're supposed to be a leader if you're a manager.
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๋ผ๋ฉด ๋ฆฌ๋”๊ฐ€ ๋˜์–ด์•ผ ํ•ฉ๋‹ˆ๋‹ค .
04:32
You're supposed to give people guidance.
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์‚ฌ๋žŒ๋“ค์—๊ฒŒ ์ง€์นจ์„ ์ œ๊ณตํ•ด์•ผ ํ•ฉ๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
04:34
And if you don't do that properly, no one's going to follow you.
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๊ทธ๋ฆฌ๊ณ  ๋‹น์‹ ์ด ๊ทธ๊ฒƒ์„ ์ œ๋Œ€๋กœ ํ•˜์ง€ ์•Š๋Š”๋‹ค๋ฉด, ์•„๋ฌด๋„ ๋‹น์‹ ์„ ๋”ฐ๋ฅด์ง€ ์•Š์„ ๊ฒƒ์ž…๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
04:38
Your team, it's not going to work too well.
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๋‹น์‹ ์˜ ํŒ€์€ ์ž˜ ์ž‘๋™ํ•˜์ง€ ์•Š์„ ๊ฒƒ์ž…๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
04:42
So: "Shut up!
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๊ทธ๋ž˜์„œ: "๋‹ฅ์ณ!
04:44
Oh my god!"
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์˜ค ๋งˆ์ด ๊ฐ“!"
04:46
I understand, as a parent, children are loud, or in a classroom the classroom gets crazy;
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๋‚˜๋Š” ๋ถ€๋ชจ๋กœ์„œ ์•„์ด๋“ค์ด ์‹œ๋„๋Ÿฝ ๊ฑฐ๋‚˜ ๊ต์‹ค์—์„œ ๊ต์‹ค์ด ๋‚œ๋ฆฌ๊ฐ€ ๋‚œ๋‹ค๋Š” ๊ฒƒ์„ ์ดํ•ดํ•ฉ๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
04:53
students are loud.
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ํ•™์ƒ๋“ค์€ ์‹œ๋„๋Ÿฝ๋‹ค.
04:54
You want to just scream: "Shut up!" or "Be quiet!"
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"๋‹ฅ์ณ!" ๋˜๋Š” " ์กฐ์šฉํžˆ ํ•ด!"
04:59
Okay, do it.
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์ข‹์•„, ํ•ด.
05:01
But if that doesn't work, another method you could say is, especially to children: "Please
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ํ•˜์ง€๋งŒ ๊ทธ๋ž˜๋„ ์ž‘๋™ํ•˜์ง€ ์•Š๋Š” ๊ฒฝ์šฐ ํŠนํžˆ ์–ด๋ฆฐ์ด์—๊ฒŒ ๋งํ•  ์ˆ˜ ์žˆ๋Š” ๋˜ ๋‹ค๋ฅธ ๋ฐฉ๋ฒ•์€ "
05:07
speak in a quieter voice."
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์กฐ์šฉํ•œ ๋ชฉ์†Œ๋ฆฌ๋กœ ๋งํ•˜์‹ญ์‹œ์˜ค."์ž…๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
05:10
So, maybe your kids are running around the house, screaming and yelling, or they're just
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๋”ฐ๋ผ์„œ ์ž๋…€๊ฐ€ ์ง‘ ์•ˆ์„ ๋›ฐ์–ด๋‹ค๋‹ˆ๋ฉฐ ๋น„๋ช…์„ ์ง€๋ฅด๊ฑฐ๋‚˜
05:16
so excited: "Wah!
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"์™€!
05:17
Oh my god!"
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์˜ค ๋งˆ์ด ๊ฐ“!"
05:18
That's good.
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์ข‹์•„์š”.
05:19
It's good to show excitement, but it's better to say to them: "Please talk in a quieter
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ํฅ๋ถ„์„ ํ‘œํ˜„ํ•˜๋Š” ๊ฒƒ๋„ ์ข‹์ง€๋งŒ, ๊ทธ๋“ค์—๊ฒŒ ์ด๋ ‡๊ฒŒ ๋งํ•˜๋Š” ๊ฒƒ์ด ์ข‹์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค. "์กฐ์šฉํ•œ
05:26
voice.
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๋ชฉ์†Œ๋ฆฌ๋กœ ๋งํ•˜์‹ญ์‹œ์˜ค.
05:27
Please be more quiet.
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์ข€ ๋” ์กฐ์šฉํžˆ ํ•˜์‹ญ์‹œ์˜ค.
05:28
You don't have to stop talking, but just keep the level down."
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๋ง์„ ๋ฉˆ์ถœ ํ•„์š”๋Š” ์—†์ง€๋งŒ ์ˆ˜์œ„๋ฅผ ๋‚ฎ์ถ”์‹ญ์‹œ์˜ค."
05:32
There's something I think from The Simpsons, and they had a thing: "Inside voice and outside voice."
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The Simpsons์—์„œ ์ œ๊ฐ€ ์ƒ๊ฐํ•˜๋Š” ๊ฒƒ์ด ์žˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค. ๊ทธ๋“ค์€ "๋‚ด๋ถ€ ๋ชฉ์†Œ๋ฆฌ์™€ ์™ธ๋ถ€ ๋ชฉ์†Œ๋ฆฌ"๋ผ๋Š” ๊ฒƒ์„ ๊ฐ€์ง€๊ณ  ์žˆ์—ˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
05:40
So, when you go outside, you have to speak louder because there's more interference;
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๊ทธ๋ž˜์„œ ๋ฐ–์— ๋‚˜๊ฐ€๋ฉด ๊ฐ„์„ญ์ด ๋” ๋งŽ๊ธฐ ๋•Œ๋ฌธ์— ๋” ํฌ๊ฒŒ ๋งํ•ด์•ผ ํ•ฉ๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
05:45
when you're inside, your voice should be quieter.
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๋‹น์‹ ์ด ์•ˆ์— ์žˆ์„ ๋•Œ, ๋‹น์‹ ์˜ ๋ชฉ์†Œ๋ฆฌ๋Š” ๋” ์กฐ์šฉํ•ด์•ผ ํ•ฉ๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
05:48
So, some people say: "Use your inside voice", which means be a little quieter.
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๊ทธ๋ž˜์„œ ์–ด๋–ค ์‚ฌ๋žŒ๋“ค์€ "๋‹น์‹ ์˜ ๋‚ด๋ฉด์˜ ๋ชฉ์†Œ๋ฆฌ๋ฅผ ์‚ฌ์šฉํ•˜๋ผ"๊ณ  ๋งํ•˜๋Š”๋ฐ, ๊ทธ๊ฒƒ์€ ์กฐ๊ธˆ ๋” ์กฐ์šฉํžˆ ํ•˜๋ผ๋Š” ๋œป์ž…๋‹ˆ๋‹ค. ํ•ญ์ƒ
05:55
Do you know people that use their outside voice all the time?
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์™ธ๋ถ€ ๋ชฉ์†Œ๋ฆฌ๋ฅผ ์‚ฌ์šฉํ•˜๋Š” ์‚ฌ๋žŒ๋“ค์„ ์•Œ๊ณ  ์žˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๊นŒ ?
05:59
Like on the phone: "Hey, Mom!
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์ „ํ™”์ƒ์œผ๋กœ: "์—„๋งˆ,
06:01
How's it go-..."
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์–ด๋•Œ์š”-..."
06:02
Hey.
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ํ—ค์ด.
06:03
Don't yell at the phone; your Mom can hear you.
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์ „ํ™”์— ์†Œ๋ฆฌ๋ฅผ ์ง€๋ฅด์ง€ ๋งˆ์‹ญ์‹œ์˜ค. ๋‹น์‹ ์˜ ์—„๋งˆ๋Š” ๋‹น์‹ ์„๋“ค์„ ์ˆ˜ ์žˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค .
06:08
This is a problem with children, with other people who aren't children (adults) - a lot
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์ด๊ฒƒ์€ ์–ด๋ฆฐ์ด์™€ ์–ด๋ฆฐ์ด๊ฐ€ ์•„๋‹Œ ๋‹ค๋ฅธ ์‚ฌ๋žŒ๋“ค(์„ฑ์ธ)์˜ ๋ฌธ์ œ์ž…๋‹ˆ๋‹ค. ๋งŽ์€
06:15
of kids like to say bad words.
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์–ด๋ฆฐ์ด๋“ค์ด ๋‚˜์œ ๋ง์„ ํ•˜๋Š” ๊ฒƒ์„ ์ข‹์•„ํ•ฉ๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
06:17
I say bad words.
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๋‚˜๋Š” ๋‚˜์œ ๋ง์„ ํ•œ๋‹ค.
06:20
But you don't want your child to go to school and tell someone off or use bad words to children
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๊ทธ๋Ÿฌ๋‚˜ ๋‹น์‹ ์€ ๋‹น์‹ ์˜ ์•„์ด๊ฐ€ ํ•™๊ต์— ๊ฐ€์„œ ๋ˆ„๊ตฐ๊ฐ€์—๊ฒŒ ๋‚˜์œ ๋ง์„ ํ•˜๊ฑฐ๋‚˜ ์ข‹์ง€ ์•Š์€ ๋ง์„ ํ•˜๋Š” ๊ฒƒ์„ ์›ํ•˜์ง€ ์•Š์„ ๊ฒƒ์ž…๋‹ˆ๋‹ค
06:27
because it's not cool.
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.
06:29
So, you can say to your child: "Hey, hey, hey.
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๊ทธ๋ž˜์„œ, ๋‹น์‹ ์€ ๋‹น์‹ ์˜ ์•„์ด์—๊ฒŒ ์ด๋ ‡๊ฒŒ ๋งํ•  ์ˆ˜ ์žˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
06:33
Do you know what?
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06:34
Let's... let's please speak with respect to other people.
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06:38
You might be angry right now or you might have a problem, but bad words do not solve anything.
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์•„๋ฌด ๊ฒƒ๋„ ํ•ด๊ฒฐํ•˜์ง€ ๋ง๊ณ 
06:45
Let's talk with respect and try and work out the problem."
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์ •์ค‘ํ•˜๊ฒŒ ์ด์•ผ๊ธฐํ•˜๊ณ  ๋ฌธ์ œ๋ฅผ ํ•ด๊ฒฐํ•˜๋„๋ก ๋…ธ๋ ฅํ•ฉ์‹œ๋‹ค."
06:49
It's the same in an office.
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์‚ฌ๋ฌด์‹ค์—์„œ๋„ ๋งˆ์ฐฌ๊ฐ€์ง€๋‹ค.
06:50
If two office...
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์‚ฌ๋ฌด์‹ค์ด ๋‘ ๊ฐœ์ธ ๊ฒฝ์šฐ...
06:51
If co-workers are going crazy, and they're...
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๋™๋ฃŒ๋“ค์ด ๋ฏธ์ณ๋ฒ„๋ฆฌ๋ฉด ๊ทธ๋“ค์€...
06:53
They're: "Ah!"
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๊ทธ๋“ค์€: "์•„!"
06:54
They hate each other, they want to kill each other or there's a problem - don't use bad
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๊ทธ๋“ค์€ ์„œ๋กœ๋ฅผ ๋ฏธ์›Œํ•˜๊ณ , ์„œ๋กœ๋ฅผ ์ฃฝ์ด๊ณ  ์‹ถ์–ดํ•˜๊ฑฐ๋‚˜ ๋ฌธ์ œ๊ฐ€ ์žˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค. ๋‚˜์œ ๋ง์„ ์‚ฌ์šฉํ•˜์ง€ ๋งˆ์„ธ์š”
06:59
words because, again, that escalates into violence.
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.
07:02
Oh, that's chaos.
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์˜ค, ๊ทธ๊ฑด ํ˜ผ๋ˆ์ด์•ผ.
07:04
Not that bad, but it just has bad energy.
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๊ทธ๋ ‡๊ฒŒ ๋‚˜์˜์ง€๋Š” ์•Š์ง€๋งŒ ๋‚˜์œ ์—๋„ˆ์ง€๊ฐ€ ์žˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
07:08
So, try and get the person to use a calmer voice and talk about things.
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๋”ฐ๋ผ์„œ ๊ทธ ์‚ฌ๋žŒ์ด ๋” ์ฐจ๋ถ„ํ•œ ๋ชฉ์†Œ๋ฆฌ๋ฅผ ์‚ฌ์šฉํ•˜๊ณ  ์‚ฌ๋ฌผ์— ๋Œ€ํ•ด ์ด์•ผ๊ธฐํ•˜๋„๋ก ํ•˜์‹ญ์‹œ์˜ค.
07:15
This is really good for children because kids love to do this.
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์•„์ด๋“ค์ด ์ด๊ฒƒ์„ ์ข‹์•„ํ•˜๊ธฐ ๋•Œ๋ฌธ์— ์ด๊ฒƒ์€ ์•„์ด๋“ค์—๊ฒŒ ์ •๋ง ์ข‹์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค .
07:19
I guess I'm a kid; I like to make a mess, too.
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๋‚˜๋Š” ์–ด๋ฆฐ์• ์ธ ๊ฒƒ ๊ฐ™๋‹ค. ์—‰๋ง์œผ๋กœ ๋งŒ๋“œ๋Š” ๊ฒƒ๋„ ์ข‹์•„ํ•ฉ๋‹ˆ๋‹ค .
07:22
So, kids like to make a mess.
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๊ทธ๋ž˜์„œ ์•„์ด๋“ค์€ ์—‰๋ง์ง„์ฐฝ์„ ์ข‹์•„ํ•ฉ๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
07:25
"Make a mess" means put things everywhere, get things dirty, colour on things, leave
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"Make a mess"๋Š” ๋ฌผ๊ฑด์„ ์•„๋ฌด๋ฐ๋‚˜ ๋‘๊ฑฐ๋‚˜, ๋ฌผ๊ฑด์„ ๋”๋Ÿฝํžˆ๊ฑฐ๋‚˜, ์ƒ‰์น ํ•˜๊ฑฐ๋‚˜,
07:32
toys everywhere.
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์žฅ๋‚œ๊ฐ์„ ์•„๋ฌด๋ฐ๋‚˜ ๋‘๋Š” ๊ฒƒ์„ ์˜๋ฏธํ•ฉ๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
07:34
Kids do this; it's natural.
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์•„์ด๋“ค์€ ์ด๋ ‡๊ฒŒ ํ•ฉ๋‹ˆ๋‹ค. ๊ทธ๊ฒƒ์€ ์ž์—ฐ ์Šค๋Ÿฝ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
07:36
And you get angry because you have to clean it.
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๊ทธ๋ฆฌ๊ณ  ๋‹น์‹ ์€ ๊ทธ๊ฒƒ์„ ์ฒญ์†Œํ•ด์•ผ ํ•˜๊ธฐ ๋•Œ๋ฌธ์— ํ™”๋ฅผ ๋ƒ…๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
07:40
But, hey, how about you get your kid to clean it?
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ํ•˜์ง€๋งŒ, ์•„์ด๊ฐ€ ๊ทธ๊ฒƒ์„ ์ฒญ์†Œํ•˜๊ฒŒ ํ•˜๋Š” ๊ฒƒ์€ ์–ด๋–ป์Šต๋‹ˆ๊นŒ? ๊ทธ๋“ค์˜ ์ผ์—
07:44
How about you teach them how to be responsible with their things?
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์ฑ…์ž„์„ ์ง€๋Š” ๋ฐฉ๋ฒ•์„ ๊ทธ๋“ค์—๊ฒŒ ๊ฐ€๋ฅด์น˜๋Š” ๊ฒƒ์€ ์–ด๋–ป์Šต๋‹ˆ๊นŒ ?
07:48
So, instead of saying: "Ah, you made a mess!" you can say: "Woo!
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๋”ฐ๋ผ์„œ "์•„, ์—‰๋ง์œผ๋กœ ๋งŒ๋“ค์—ˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค! "๋ผ๊ณ  ๋งํ•˜๋Š” ๋Œ€์‹ ์—. ๋‹น์‹ ์€ ๋งํ•  ์ˆ˜ ์žˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค: "์šฐ!
07:53
It looks like you had fun today.
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์˜ค๋Š˜ ์ฆ๊ฑฐ์› ๋‚˜ ๋ณด๋„ค์š”.
07:57
Let's clean it up now.
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์ด์ œ ์น˜์šฐ์ž.
07:59
I'll help you."
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๋‚ด๊ฐ€ ๋„์™€์ค„๊ฒŒ."
08:00
Or: "You'll clean this up and it'll be better."
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๋˜๋Š”: "์ด๊ฒƒ์„ ์ •๋ฆฌํ•˜๋ฉด ๋” ์ข‹์•„์งˆ ๊ฒƒ์ž…๋‹ˆ๋‹ค."
08:04
You want to encourage the child to clean up his or her own mess.
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๋‹น์‹ ์€ ์•„์ด๊ฐ€ ์Šค์Šค๋กœ ์–ด์งˆ๋Ÿฌ ๋†“์€ ๊ฒƒ์„ ์น˜์šฐ๋„๋ก ๊ฒฉ๋ คํ•˜๊ณ  ์‹ถ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค .
08:10
Not you; you're not the maid of your child.
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๋„ˆ ๋ง๊ณ ; ๋‹น์‹ ์€ ๋‹น์‹  ์•„์ด์˜ ๊ฐ€์ •๋ถ€๊ฐ€ ์•„๋‹™๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
08:15
You want to teach the kid responsibility and how to do things for themselves; very important.
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๋‹น์‹ ์€ ์•„์ด์—๊ฒŒ ์ฑ…์ž„๊ฐ๊ณผ ์Šค์Šค๋กœ ์ผ์„ ํ•˜๋Š” ๋ฐฉ๋ฒ•์„ ๊ฐ€๋ฅด์น˜๊ณ  ์‹ถ์–ดํ•ฉ๋‹ˆ๋‹ค. ๋งค์šฐ ์ค‘์š”.
08:20
Next one.
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๋‹ค์Œ.
08:22
Now, this is something that is very frustrating.
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์ž, ์ด๊ฒƒ์€ ๋งค์šฐ ์‹ค๋ง์Šค๋Ÿฌ์šด ๊ฒƒ์ž…๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
08:27
You give people instructions at a job, in a classroom, or for anyone, and they do it
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๋‹น์‹ ์€ ์ง์žฅ์—์„œ, ๊ต์‹ค์—์„œ, ๋˜๋Š” ๋ˆ„๊ตฌ์—๊ฒŒ๋‚˜ ์‚ฌ๋žŒ๋“ค์—๊ฒŒ ์ง€์‹œ๋ฅผ ๋‚ด๋ ธ๋Š”๋ฐ, ๊ทธ๋“ค์ด
08:35
wrong or they just don't do it, and you say: "Oh my god.
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์ž˜๋ชปํ–ˆ๊ฑฐ๋‚˜ ๊ทธ๋ƒฅ ํ•˜์ง€ ์•Š์•˜์„ ๋ฟ์ด๊ณ , ๋‹น์‹ ์€ ์ด๋ ‡๊ฒŒ ๋งํ•ฉ๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
08:40
I already told you how to do this.
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08:45
Why didn't you do it the correct way?
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์˜ฌ๋ฐ”๋ฅธ ๋ฐฉ๋ฒ•์œผ๋กœ ํ•˜์ง€ ์•Š์Šต๋‹ˆ๊นŒ?
08:48
What's wrong with you?"
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๋ฌด์Šจ ๋ฌธ์ œ๊ฐ€ ์žˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๊นŒ?"
08:50
So this shuts the person down; they will not want to do anything for you again.
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๊ทธ๋ž˜์„œ ์ด๊ฒƒ์€ ๊ทธ ์‚ฌ๋žŒ์„ ๋‹ซ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค. ๊ทธ๋“ค์€ ๋‹น์‹ ์„ ์œ„ํ•ด ๋‹ค์‹œ๋Š” ์•„๋ฌด๊ฒƒ๋„ ํ•˜๊ณ  ์‹ถ์–ดํ•˜์ง€ ์•Š์„ ๊ฒƒ์ž…๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
08:55
So, instead of saying this, you can say: "Oh, do you know what?
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๋”ฐ๋ผ์„œ ์ด๋ ‡๊ฒŒ ๋งํ•˜๋Š” ๋Œ€์‹ ์— ์ด๋ ‡๊ฒŒ ๋งํ•  ์ˆ˜ ์žˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค. "์˜ค, ๊ทธ๊ฑฐ ์•„์„ธ์š”?
08:59
Let me give you another example of how I want you to do this or how this could be done."
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์ œ๊ฐ€ ๋‹น์‹ ์ด ์ด๊ฒƒ์„ ์–ด๋–ป๊ฒŒ ํ•˜๊ธฐ๋ฅผ ์›ํ•˜๋Š”์ง€ ๋˜๋Š” ์–ด๋–ป๊ฒŒ ํ•  ์ˆ˜ ์žˆ๋Š”์ง€์— ๋Œ€ํ•œ ๋˜ ๋‹ค๋ฅธ ์˜ˆ๋ฅผ ๋“ค์–ด ๋ณด๊ฒ ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค."
09:05
Maybe the person didn't really understand you, and that's why they didn't do it the
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๊ทธ ์‚ฌ๋žŒ์ด ๋‹น์‹ ์„ ์ œ๋Œ€๋กœ ์ดํ•ดํ•˜์ง€ ๋ชปํ–ˆ๊ธฐ ๋•Œ๋ฌธ์— ๋‹น์‹ ์ด ์›ํ•˜๋Š” ๋Œ€๋กœ ํ•˜์ง€ ์•Š์•˜
09:12
way you wanted them to, or they're just being disrespectful.
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๊ฑฐ๋‚˜ ๊ทธ๋ƒฅ ๋ฌด๋ก€ํ•˜๊ฒŒ ๊ตด์—ˆ์„ ์ˆ˜๋„ ์žˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
09:17
You always have to find out the proper situation first.
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ํ•ญ์ƒ ์ ์ ˆํ•œ ์ƒํ™ฉ์„ ๋จผ์ € ์ฐพ์•„์•ผ ํ•ฉ๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
09:22
Is the person doing this because they just want to, or do they clearly not understand
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๊ทธ ์‚ฌ๋žŒ์ด ์›ํ•˜๊ธฐ ๋•Œ๋ฌธ์— ๊ทธ๋ ‡๊ฒŒ ํ•˜๋Š” ๊ฒƒ์ž…๋‹ˆ๊นŒ , ์•„๋‹ˆ๋ฉด ๋ฌด์Šจ ์ผ์ด ์ผ์–ด๋‚ฌ๋Š”์ง€ ๋ช…ํ™•ํ•˜๊ฒŒ ์ดํ•ดํ•˜์ง€ ๋ชปํ•˜๋Š” ๊ฒƒ์ž…๋‹ˆ๊นŒ
09:30
what's happened?
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?
09:31
If that's the case, give them another example, tell them again, help them.
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๊ทธ๋ ‡๋‹ค๋ฉด ๋‹ค๋ฅธ ์˜ˆ๋ฅผ ๋“ค์–ด ๋‹ค์‹œ ๋งํ•˜๊ณ  ๋„์™€์ฃผ์„ธ์š”.
09:36
If you help them, they help you; it's a two-way street.
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๋‹น์‹ ์ด ๊ทธ๋“ค์„ ๋•๋Š”๋‹ค๋ฉด ๊ทธ๋“ค์€ ๋‹น์‹ ์„ ๋•์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค. ๊ทธ๊ฒƒ์€ ์–‘๋ฐฉํ–ฅ ๊ฑฐ๋ฆฌ์ž…๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
09:41
This is a big one, too.
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์ด๊ฒƒ๋„ ํฐ์ผ์ž…๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
09:43
Now, people overreact all the time.
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์ด์ œ ์‚ฌ๋žŒ๋“ค์€ ํ•ญ์ƒ ๊ณผ์ž‰ ๋ฐ˜์‘ํ•ฉ๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
09:47
And as I told you at the beginning: "Relax.
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์ฒ˜์Œ์— ๋งํ–ˆ๋“ฏ์ด "์ง„์ •ํ•˜์„ธ์š”.
09:49
Oh my god.
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์„ธ์ƒ์—.
09:50
You're taking life too seriously."
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๋‹น์‹ ์€ ์‚ถ์„ ๋„ˆ๋ฌด ์‹ฌ๊ฐํ•˜๊ฒŒ ์ƒ๊ฐํ•˜๊ณ  ์žˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค."
09:52
Well, everyone is entitled to their own emotions.
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๊ธ€์Ž„, ๋ชจ๋“  ์‚ฌ๋žŒ์€ ์ž์‹ ์˜ ๊ฐ์ •์— ๋Œ€ํ•œ ๊ถŒ๋ฆฌ๊ฐ€ ์žˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
09:57
If something makes you angry or something makes you sad, that's fine; those are your
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๋‹น์‹ ์„ ํ™”๋‚˜๊ฒŒ ํ•˜๊ฑฐ๋‚˜ ์Šฌํ”„๊ฒŒ ํ•˜๋Š” ๊ฒƒ์ด ์žˆ๋‹ค๋ฉด ๊ดœ์ฐฎ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค. ๊ทธ๊ฒƒ์€ ๋‹น์‹ ์˜
10:02
emotions, and you have the right to express them any way you want.
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๊ฐ์ •์ด๋ฉฐ ์›ํ•˜๋Š” ๋ฐฉ์‹์œผ๋กœ ํ‘œํ˜„ํ•  ๊ถŒ๋ฆฌ๊ฐ€ ์žˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค .
10:05
But if you tell someone: "You're overreacting!
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๊ทธ๋Ÿฌ๋‚˜ ๋‹น์‹ ์ด ๋ˆ„๊ตฐ๊ฐ€์—๊ฒŒ ๋งํ•œ๋‹ค๋ฉด: "๋‹น์‹ ์€ ๊ณผ์ž‰ ๋ฐ˜์‘์„ ํ•˜๊ณ  ์žˆ์–ด์š”!
10:08
Relax!
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์ง„์ •ํ•˜์„ธ์š”!
10:09
Calm down!" this makes the person sadder, makes them cry more, or it makes them more angry.
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์ง„์ •ํ•˜์„ธ์š”!" ์ด๊ฒƒ์€ ๊ทธ ์‚ฌ๋žŒ์„ ๋” ์Šฌํ”„๊ฒŒ ๋งŒ๋“ค๊ณ , ๋” ๋งŽ์ด ์šธ๊ฒŒ ๋งŒ๋“ค๊ณ , ๋” ํ™”๋‚˜๊ฒŒ ๋งŒ๋“ญ๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
10:18
You don't want to do that.
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๋‹น์‹ ์€ ๊ทธ๋ ‡๊ฒŒํ•˜๊ณ  ์‹ถ์ง€ ์•Š์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
10:19
You want the person to relax, but without telling them.
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๋‹น์‹ ์€ ๊ทธ ์‚ฌ๋žŒ์ด ๊ธด์žฅ์„ ํ’€๊ธฐ๋ฅผ ์›ํ•˜์ง€๋งŒ ๊ทธ๋“ค์—๊ฒŒ ๋งํ•˜์ง€๋Š” ์•Š์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
10:23
So, you can say: "Hey, hey, hey.
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๊ทธ๋Ÿฌ๋‹ˆ ์ด๋ ‡๊ฒŒ ๋งํ•  ์ˆ˜ ์žˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค. "ํ—ค์ด, ํ—ค์ด, ํ—ค์ด.
10:25
Don't worry."
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๊ฑฑ์ •๋งˆ."
10:26
Maybe you give your child a task to do and they can't do it, say: "Don't worry.
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์•„๋งˆ๋„ ๋‹น์‹ ์€ ๋‹น์‹ ์˜ ์•„์ด์—๊ฒŒ ํ•  ์ผ์„ ์คฌ๋Š”๋ฐ ๊ทธ๋“ค์ด ๊ทธ๊ฒƒ์„ ํ•  ์ˆ˜ ์—†์„์ง€๋„ ๋ชจ๋ฆ…๋‹ˆ๋‹ค. "๊ฑฑ์ •๋งˆ.
10:32
Try it again.
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๋‹ค์‹œ ํ•ด๋ด.
10:33
You can do it."
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๋„Œ ํ•  ์ˆ˜ ์žˆ์–ด."
10:35
You need to encourage children, you need to encourage people if they fail to do it again,
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๋‹น์‹ ์€ ์•„์ด๋“ค์„ ๊ฒฉ๋ คํ•ด์•ผ ํ•˜๊ณ , ์‚ฌ๋žŒ๋“ค์ด ๊ณ„์†ํ•ด์„œ ๊ทธ๋ ‡๊ฒŒ ํ•˜์ง€ ๋ชปํ•œ๋‹ค๋ฉด ์‚ฌ๋žŒ๋“ค์„ ๊ฒฉ๋ คํ•ด์•ผ ํ•ฉ๋‹ˆ๋‹ค
10:43
and again, and again.
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.
10:45
By this time, just give up.
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์ด์ฏค๋˜๋ฉด ๊ทธ๋ƒฅ ํฌ๊ธฐํ•˜์„ธ์š”.
10:47
I mean, come on.
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๋‚ด ๋ง์€, ์–ด์„œ.
10:48
They're never going to do it.
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๊ทธ๋“ค์€ ๊ฒฐ์ฝ” ๊ทธ๋ ‡๊ฒŒ ํ•˜์ง€ ์•Š์„ ๊ฒƒ์ž…๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
10:49
But you need to tell them to at least try to do it.
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ํ•˜์ง€๋งŒ ์ ์–ด๋„ ํ•ด๋ณด๋ผ๊ณ  ๋งํ•ด์•ผ ํ•ฉ๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
10:52
It's kind of like me and math.
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๊ทธ๊ฒƒ์€ ๋‚˜์™€ ์ˆ˜ํ•™๊ณผ ๋น„์Šทํ•ฉ๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
10:55
I'm terrible in math, and I just gave up.
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๋‚˜๋Š” ์ˆ˜ํ•™์ด ๋”์ฐํ•ด์„œ ๊ทธ๋ƒฅ ํฌ๊ธฐํ–ˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
10:59
Now I have a calculator.
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์ด์ œ ๊ณ„์‚ฐ๊ธฐ๊ฐ€ ์žˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
11:01
Yes.
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์˜ˆ.
11:02
Thank you, cell phones.
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๊ณ ๋งˆ์›Œ์š”, ํœด๋Œ€ํฐ.
11:03
Math teachers, I don't need your help.
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์ˆ˜ํ•™ ์„ ์ƒ๋‹˜๋“ค, ๋‚˜๋Š” ๋‹น์‹ ์˜ ๋„์›€์ด ํ•„์š”ํ•˜์ง€ ์•Š์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
11:06
Another thing that we do because we understand more than a student, or more than a child,
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์šฐ๋ฆฌ๊ฐ€ ํ•™์ƒ๋ณด๋‹ค, ์•„์ด๋ณด๋‹ค,
11:14
or maybe more than a worker is we tell people: "What?
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์–ด์ฉŒ๋ฉด ๋…ธ๋™์ž๋ณด๋‹ค ๋” ์ดํ•ดํ•˜๊ธฐ ๋•Œ๋ฌธ์— ์šฐ๋ฆฌ๊ฐ€ ํ•˜๋Š” ๋˜ ๋‹ค๋ฅธ ์ผ์€ ์‚ฌ๋žŒ๋“ค์—๊ฒŒ ์ด๋ ‡๊ฒŒ ๋งํ•˜๋Š” ๊ฒƒ์ž…๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
11:18
It's not hard; it's easy.
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11:20
Come on.
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11:22
Why can't you do this?"
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?"
11:24
So, this makes the person feel stupid.
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๊ทธ๋ž˜์„œ ์ด๊ฒƒ์€ ์‚ฌ๋žŒ์„ ์–ด๋ฆฌ์„๊ฒŒ ๋งŒ๋“ญ๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
11:28
"Oh my god.
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"์˜ค ๋งˆ์ด ๊ฐ“.
11:29
I can't do this."
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๋‚œ ์ด๋Ÿด ์ˆ˜ ์—†์–ด."
11:30
Especially children, if you say: "Come on, you can...
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ํŠนํžˆ ์•„์ด๋“ค์ด "์ด๋ด, ํ•  ์ˆ˜ ์žˆ์–ด...
11:34
Why can't you do this?" the child feels like they don't want to try even.
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์™œ ์ด๊ฑธ ๋ชป ํ•ด?" ์•„์ด๋Š” ์‹œ๋„์กฐ์ฐจ ํ•˜๊ณ  ์‹ถ์ง€ ์•Š๋‹ค๊ณ  ๋Š๋‚๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
11:39
So, again, you're going to encourage them.
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๊ทธ๋ž˜์„œ, ๋‹ค์‹œ, ๋‹น์‹ ์€ ๊ทธ๋“ค์„ ๊ฒฉ๋ คํ•  ๊ฒƒ์ž…๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
11:41
Say: "Do you know what?
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"๊ทธ๊ฑฐ ์•Œ์•„?
11:42
Oh, this is hard for you; that's okay.
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์˜ค, ์ด๊ฑด ๋„ˆ์—๊ฒŒ ํž˜๋“  ์ผ์ด์•ผ. ๊ดœ์ฐฎ์•„.
11:46
Let me help you.
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๋‚ด๊ฐ€ ๋„์™€์ค„๊ฒŒ.
11:48
You can do it."
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๋„Œ ํ•  ์ˆ˜ ์žˆ์–ด."
11:49
Again, when you encourage people, it makes them want to try the thing again.
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๋‹ค์‹œ ๋งํ•˜์ง€๋งŒ, ์‚ฌ๋žŒ๋“ค์„ ๊ฒฉ๋ คํ•˜๋ฉด ๋‹ค์‹œ ์‹œ๋„ํ•˜๊ณ  ์‹ถ๊ฒŒ ๋งŒ๋“ญ๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
11:56
So, if you are a teacher in a classroom and you're having control issues with your class,
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๋”ฐ๋ผ์„œ ๊ต์‹ค์˜ ๊ต์‚ฌ์ด๊ณ  ์ˆ˜์—…์— ํ†ต์ œ ๋ฌธ์ œ๊ฐ€ ์žˆ๊ฑฐ๋‚˜
12:02
or if you are a mother or a father or a babysitter or you have kids around you and you need them
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์–ด๋จธ๋‹ˆ๋‚˜ ์•„๋ฒ„์ง€ ๋˜๋Š” ๋ฒ ์ด๋น„์‹œํ„ฐ ์ด๊ฑฐ๋‚˜ ์ฃผ๋ณ€์— ์ž๋…€๊ฐ€ ์žˆ๊ณ  ์ž๋…€๊ฐ€ ๊ท€ํ•˜์˜
12:09
to follow your instructions and respect you, if you're a boss at a job or a manager and
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์ง€์‹œ๋ฅผ ๋”ฐ๋ฅด๊ณ  ๊ท€ํ•˜๋ฅผ ์กด์ค‘ํ•ด์•ผ ํ•˜๋Š” ๊ฒฝ์šฐ , ๋งŒ์•ฝ ๋‹น์‹ ์ด ์ง์žฅ์˜ ์ƒ์‚ฌ์ด๊ฑฐ๋‚˜ ๊ด€๋ฆฌ์ž์ด๊ณ 
12:16
the employees aren't working well together - I want you to examine yourself.
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์ง์›๋“ค์ด ํ•จ๊ป˜ ์ผ์„ ์ž˜ํ•˜์ง€ ๋ชปํ•œ๋‹ค๋ฉด ์Šค์Šค๋กœ๋ฅผ ๋Œ์•„๋ณด๊ธธ ๋ฐ”๋ž€๋‹ค.
12:21
I want you to look to see if you are a good leader; if you are using language that actually
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๋‚˜๋Š” ๋‹น์‹ ์ด ํ›Œ๋ฅญํ•œ ๋ฆฌ๋”์ธ์ง€ ์‚ดํŽด๋ณด๊ธฐ๋ฅผ ๋ฐ”๋ž๋‹ˆ๋‹ค. ์‹ค์ œ๋กœ
12:28
encourages people or most of the time-and I do this, too-we use language that makes
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์‚ฌ๋žŒ๋“ค์„ ๊ฒฉ๋ คํ•˜๋Š” ์–ธ์–ด๋ฅผ ์‚ฌ์šฉํ•˜๊ฑฐ๋‚˜ ๋Œ€๋ถ€๋ถ„์˜ ์‹œ๊ฐ„์„ ์‚ฌ์šฉํ•˜๋Š” ๊ฒฝ์šฐ- ์ €๋„ ์ด ์ž‘์—…์„ ์ˆ˜ํ–‰ํ•ฉ๋‹ˆ๋‹ค-์šฐ๋ฆฌ๋Š”
12:35
people close up and not want to help.
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์‚ฌ๋žŒ๋“ค์„ ๋‹ซ๊ณ  ๋„์™€์ฃผ๊ณ  ์‹ถ์ง€ ์•Š๊ฒŒ ๋งŒ๋“œ๋Š” ์–ธ์–ด๋ฅผ ์‚ฌ์šฉํ•ฉ๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
12:38
So, take a look at yourself, and then you can help the people that need your guidance.
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๊ทธ๋Ÿฌ๋‹ˆ ์ž์‹ ์„ ๋Œ์•„๋ณด๊ณ  ์ง€๋„๊ฐ€ ํ•„์š”ํ•œ ์‚ฌ๋žŒ๋“ค์„ ๋„์šธ ์ˆ˜ ์žˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
12:44
This is all the tips I have for today.
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์ด๊ฒƒ์ด ์˜ค๋Š˜ ๋‚ด๊ฐ€ ๊ฐ€์ง„ ๋ชจ๋“  ํŒ์ž…๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
12:46
Go out, have fun at work, and encourage people to be good.
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๋‚˜๊ฐ€์„œ ์ง์žฅ์—์„œ ์ฆ๊ฒ๊ฒŒ ์ง€๋‚ด๊ณ  ์‚ฌ๋žŒ๋“ค์ด ์ข‹์€ ์‚ฌ๋žŒ์ด ๋˜๋„๋ก ๊ฒฉ๋ คํ•˜์‹ญ์‹œ์˜ค.
12:50
Don't be evil.
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๋‚˜์œ ์ง“ ํ•˜์ง€๋งˆ.
์ด ์›น์‚ฌ์ดํŠธ ์ •๋ณด

์ด ์‚ฌ์ดํŠธ๋Š” ์˜์–ด ํ•™์Šต์— ์œ ์šฉํ•œ YouTube ๋™์˜์ƒ์„ ์†Œ๊ฐœํ•ฉ๋‹ˆ๋‹ค. ์ „ ์„ธ๊ณ„ ์ตœ๊ณ ์˜ ์„ ์ƒ๋‹˜๋“ค์ด ๊ฐ€๋ฅด์น˜๋Š” ์˜์–ด ์ˆ˜์—…์„ ๋ณด๊ฒŒ ๋  ๊ฒƒ์ž…๋‹ˆ๋‹ค. ๊ฐ ๋™์˜์ƒ ํŽ˜์ด์ง€์— ํ‘œ์‹œ๋˜๋Š” ์˜์–ด ์ž๋ง‰์„ ๋”๋ธ” ํด๋ฆญํ•˜๋ฉด ๊ทธ๊ณณ์—์„œ ๋™์˜์ƒ์ด ์žฌ์ƒ๋ฉ๋‹ˆ๋‹ค. ๋น„๋””์˜ค ์žฌ์ƒ์— ๋งž์ถฐ ์ž๋ง‰์ด ์Šคํฌ๋กค๋ฉ๋‹ˆ๋‹ค. ์˜๊ฒฌ์ด๋‚˜ ์š”์ฒญ์ด ์žˆ๋Š” ๊ฒฝ์šฐ ์ด ๋ฌธ์˜ ์–‘์‹์„ ์‚ฌ์šฉํ•˜์—ฌ ๋ฌธ์˜ํ•˜์‹ญ์‹œ์˜ค.

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