Advanced English Conversation: Daily Routine English

Vanessa: Today's lesson was created by you, I  

asked you to ask us your top questions about daily  routines. So today, I'm here with my husband, Dan.

Dan: Hello.

Vanessa: And we're going to be answering your questions.  

Will your question be featured in today's lesson?  I don't know. We'll watch to find out. Hi,  

I'm Vanessa from speakenglishwithvanessa.com. And  like always, I have created a free PDF worksheet,  

which is here over Dan's face. And it is going  to include all of the wonderful questions,  

all of the vocabulary that we're going to use  today, definitions, extra sample sentences so that  

you can use this vocabulary yourself. Because the  goal of today's lesson is to help you understand  

real conversations, but also be able to have  real conversations yourself. So please download  

this free worksheet, expand your vocabulary  and your speaking skills so that you can go  

into the world with confidence. You can click on  the link in the description to download that free  

PDF worksheet today. All right, are you ready to  get started with our first category of questions?

Dan: I'm  

ready. I'm coming in blind too,  so this should be interesting.

Vanessa: Yeah. Dan has  

no idea what these questions are. The first  category are questions about daily routine.  

The second category are questions about  food, and the third category are questions  

about activities or hobbies. And there  are a lot of questions, so we're going to  

try to whip through these lightning speed,  and just see what happens. Are you ready?

Dan: I'm ready.

Vanessa: All right. Questions  

about daily routine. The first question  is, "What is your routine every morning?"

Dan: My routine every morning. Well,  

as you know, I get out of bed, I look in the  mirror for two seconds, and I go like this.

Vanessa: And I always laugh  

because I think that is such a non-woman way to  get ready in the morning. Just, "Okay, I'm good."

Dan: Yeah, okay, nothing on my face, all right,  

go. And then maybe brush my teeth sometimes, and  then go make breakfast. So I make breakfast for  

both my kids, but not you, because you like to eat  later. And then I pack my son a lunch, and myself  

a lunch. And then we go to school, we drive to  school together. So gather all this stuff and go.

Vanessa: Yep, that's a morning routine.

Dan: How about you?

Vanessa: Well, while Dan is making breakfast,  

I wake up, I nurse our baby, and walk into the  kitchen, try to spend a little time with our  

kids. I make some tea, we eat breakfast together,  and I help our oldest get out the door with Dan.

Dan: That could be a challenge.

Vanessa: And then I spend some time with our three-year-old  

before we go to preschool. So our carpool friends  pick him up to take him to preschool, about 30  

minutes after they leave. So we have a nice 30  minutes of quality time together. And usually, I  

push him on the swing outside, that's his favorite  thing. Then he goes to preschool with our carpool  

friends, and I put our baby down for a nap, and my  day begins. All right, question number two, "How  

has your morning routine changed now that you have  three kids?" What hasn't changed is the question.

Dan: Well,  

the biggest thing is school, for me. We  never had to get ready for school before,  

and I work at the school too. So pretty  much everything has changed about the  

morning routine because of the children.  But as far as three children go, I mean-

Vanessa: Two, three-

Dan: Yeah.  

Our third baby's so easy. She doesn't  really count as far as a lot of work yet.

Vanessa: Yeah, I feel like the routine changing was more  

no kids or kids. When you don't have kids, your  morning routine is really different, we just spent  

more time, it was quieter. I don't even know what  life was like... drank my tea quietly. But now,  

you're always multitasking, I'm reading a book,  nursing a baby, and drinking my tea at the same  

time. There's just more going on all the time.  Yeah, I'd say that's the biggest thing for me.  

All right. Next question, "What is the best part  of your daily routine that you really enjoy?"

Dan: Coffee.

Vanessa: It doesn't have  

to be morning routine. It could be like-

Dan: I thought you said morning routine?

Vanessa: Daily routine.  

That's the thing that's changed  the most since having three kids.

Dan: The most about-

Vanessa: Anything that routinely  

happens in your day is considered your daily  routine. So something that happens regularly.

Dan: It might still be coffee. Yeah,  

I don't know. I have a morning coffee and an  afternoon coffee, and try to cling to those  

moments when I can. Yeah, I also like lunchtime.  Food and drink are really nice. It's routine,  

it's like, this is what I do every day. The  ride to and from school is nice as well,  

because I usually listen to something  with my son, either music or an audiobook,  

and we chat together as well. And so that's  a nice routine that we have going every day.

Vanessa: Yeah, some quality time together. Yeah.

Dan: And how about you?

Vanessa: 

Well, I had the privilege of reading these  questions in advance, so I had a moment to think  

about them. I think one of the parts of my day  that I enjoy the most is, at the end of the day,  

when we sit at the table and we eat dinner, we  often ask each other a very simple question,  

"What was the best part of your day?" Sometimes we  also ask, "What was the most challenging part of  

your day?" If a day was particularly challenging,  or just if we remember it. And it's interesting  

to hear what everyone has to say. For our kids,  sometimes it's this meal right now. They only  

live in the moment, they don't remember  what happened 10 minutes ago. It's just,  

"What was the best part of your day?" "Right now."  So I like that, kind of a moment together. Yeah,  

I think that's something that I look forward  to, coming together at the end of the day. Next  

question is, "What do you do at night when you are  going to sleep?" So what's your nighttime routine?

Dan: A nighttime routine  

for me? I don't really think I have much of a  nighttime routine... I mean, I brush my teeth.

Vanessa: Good.

Dan: And sometimes,  

I shower. These are things I sometimes do every  night, or most nights. Yeah. But other than that,  

I am the kind of guy who just hits the pillow  and falls asleep pretty quickly. Before kids,  

I had trouble going to sleep, and wouldn't  fall asleep. But now that I have children,  

when I go to bed, I'm just  going to sleep, typically.

Vanessa: You're just really tired.

Dan: Yeah, not too much of a bedtime routine. I've  

tried to throw some stuff in there before, like  trying to do breathing exercises and meditation,  

but I would say, I'm not consistent enough in  those practices to say it's a routine, as of now.

Vanessa: Okay. All right. Well,  

that's maybe the goal in the future at some point.

Dan: Yes. And for you?

Vanessa: Nighttime routine,  

what do you do at night when you're going to  sleep? I think, usually, after the kids go to bed,  

I tidy up a little bit, like you do the  dishes a little bit, I read a book usually,  

or sometimes lately, I've been listening to a  book, very exciting. And usually, like Dan said,  

I'm zonked by the end of the day, and brush my  teeth, maybe take a shower, and go to sleep.

Dan: Maybe take a shower.

Vanessa: Maybe take a shower,  

I don't know. They say it's not  healthy to take a shower every day-

Dan: Somebody says that.

Vanessa: That's what we're going with.  

But I feel like that's pretty much it. Nighttime  is a little bit more relaxed than mornings,  

because in the morning, you're trying to manage  multiple people and get started in the day,  

and there's more energy. So the end of the  day is just kind of more... All right. The  

question we touched on just a second ago, "Who  helps you?" So I think they're talking about me,  

"Who helps me in your daily chores?" So  let's talk about what chores means first,  

and then we can talk about who does daily chores.

Dan: 

The chores are any work that you have to do to  make the household run. So the classic example  

is laundry and dishes. Doing the dishes,  that's my job. I don't know if it's 50/50,  

but we split the chores. We try to be relatively  even about it. So yeah, I do the dishes and-

Vanessa: I do the laundry.

Dan: You do the laundry. Those are  

the big ones. There's a lot of kid chores, you got  to give them a bath, you got to put them to bed-

Vanessa: You make breakfast.

Dan: Those are chores.

Vanessa: I make lunch.

Dan: Oh, cooking as well. Yeah.

Vanessa: And then we both make dinner. I  

think instead of saying, "Every other day we make  dinner," it's more that there's specific meals  

that I cook and specific meals that you cook. And  depending on what we've scheduled for the week,  

we try to schedule two weeks of meal plans. And  that way, we know Monday... We have different  

days, miso Monday, taco Tuesday, soup Saturday,  stuff like this, fish Friday. And that way,  

we have some routine about food, because when  you have kids, especially when you have kids,  

just feeding them can feel really overwhelming  because they're always hungry, there's always  

something more to make. And then you're also  trying to spend time with them while you're  

cooking, and sometimes they want to help,  and that is good, but it's also chaotic. 

So I think having that routine for what you're  going to eat, when you're going to eat it,  

who's going to make it, I think that's  really important. And I would say one  

more thing about sharing chores. The  way that our lives work... we both work,  

we both have a job, and we also are parents.  So our professional and personal lives are  

very similar. I have some friends who, for  example, their husband works, and the mother,  

her 100% job is the home and the children. So  she cooks every meal because that is her job,  

that is her professional job to do that.  And it's a lot, it's very difficult.

Dan: A lot of times,  

it's harder than a real job, "a real job."

Vanessa: A moneymaking  

job is usually easier than taking care of the  home and the children. So in that situation,  

their roles would be a little bit different,  

but for us, we can split it a little more evenly  because our lives are just set up like that.

Dan: Yep. You are home more now,  

so you probably pick up more little stuff than I  do. Literally, picking up little stuff everywhere.

Vanessa: Yeah, that's a good phrase. It means you also  

do more things, but also, in the home, you have  to tidy up a lot. So you have to pick up books,  

and toys, and I don't know what... raisins on  the floor. Anyway, let's go to our next question.

Dan: Raisins.

Vanessa: There's a  

lot of raisins on the floor. This is  the last one for daily routine and  

then we'll go to food. The question is,  "How much TV do your kids watch per day?"

Dan: 

So our children don't watch any TV if they are  going to school. So they don't watch any TV that  

day, because they've had enough stimulation at  school and they don't need anymore after that.  

And we usually just read a book to them,  or do something outside for the evening-

Vanessa: And they get home late,  

and I don't want them to just watch TV and  then go to bed. There's not much time together.

Dan: Yeah. And because  

it's not a habit for them during school days, they  don't really beg for it, which is what you want.

Vanessa: They're also young,  

six years old and three years old, so they don't  know. Maybe later when they get older, they'll  

beg, "Please, I want to do this, I want to watch  this." So I don't know what the future holds.  

Maybe they'll do that in the future, but for right  now, this is the routine and they're okay with it.

Dan: Yes. And then  

so on non-school days, they're allowed to watch  30 minutes, and maybe an hour on one day a week,  

like Sunday, we let them watch a little more.  But typically, it's no more than 30 minutes.

Vanessa: Usually, I would say it's an hour, because  

they each get to choose one show. And I think the  important thing for us with TV is choosing which  

shows are okay. Because there's a lot of shows  that they say they're for kids, but it's just  

not good for kids. It's too fast, it's too much  violence, or bad attitudes, or bad role models,  

or whatever it might be. So we want to make  sure our kids are being exposed to good stuff.

Dan: Our children watch educational cartoons.

Vanessa: Well, it can be entertaining too,  

but they each get to choose one thing, so 20  minutes, 20 minutes. And I think not watching  

it on school days has been a really good routine  for us, because they get home from school... And  

for me, when I've had a really busy day, I need  to decompress and process what's happened. And if  

I jump into just media and watching a movie, or  TV, or looking at my phone, I just don't feel as  

calm. It doesn't help. And I don't want my kids  to learn that the way that you can decompress at  

the end of the day is by watching TV. I think  it's better to connect with them, at least at  

this young age, when they're still okay with  that. I understand when Theo is 13 years old,  

he's not going to say, "Mom, let's read a story  together." That would be nice, but that's okay,  

I understand it won't happen. So while they're  young, I think that's important to focus on  

connecting with them at the end of the day. All right, next category. Questions about  

food. We talked a little bit about who  cooks what, but this is, "What kind of  

meals specifically for breakfast, specifically  for lunch, and for dinner, do you cook for  

your family?" So let's start with breakfast.  What kind of things do we eat for breakfast?

Dan: Okay, well-

Vanessa: Breakfast man.

Dan: When the chickens  

were laying eggs, because we have chickens, and  they've stopped laying eggs because it got cold,  

and they molted, and whatnot. So now, we're  getting one egg every two days. Anyway,  

but before that, I cooked eggs every single day.  I would make either scrambled eggs, or fried eggs,  

and a piece of toast with some jam. And then  if not that, then I make oatmeal. And those  

are the two breakfasts, works every time. Then  for lunch, I'll make a sandwich of some kind-

Vanessa: Especially on the school day-

Dan: ... or I'll bring leftovers  

from home, which is probably what I prefer. But  sandwiches are good too. Classic American meals.

Vanessa: Yeah,  

when I make lunch for Freddy, or when we're  all home, like on a vacation, for lunch,  

because I usually make lunches if we're all home,  some type of bread, some type of spread or dip,  

so maybe it's peanut butter, or almond butter  bread, or hummus, and olives, and carrots,  

and apples, stuff like that, like little  munchies, little things like that, usually.

Dan: She is the queen of munchy lunch, that's for sure.

Vanessa: Yeah, just one big  

plate with lots of stuff on it and everyone eats  it. It doesn't have to be anything spectacular,  

but you just choose what you want. Little  pieces of cheese cut up, whatever it might be,  

you just eat it. I think for dinner, usually,  we have, like I said, a meal plan. So we have  

specific things that we make. So every Monday, Dan  is miso man, miso soup, we have fish-based miso,  

and then there's a beef-based miso. So there's  a couple of different types. We make tacos  

on Tuesdays. They're not really Mexican  tacos, they're just Vanessa style tacos.

Dan: I like Taco Tuesday.

Vanessa: So we make  

breakfast tacos with sausage, and eggs, and  potatoes. There's beef tacos, fish tacos,  

I'm sure I've made sweet potato tacos, tons  of different types. We make lots of soup.  

Some salads, depending on if it's the summertime,  and we have a lot of fresh stuff in our garden.

Dan: Borscht.

Vanessa: Oh, we made borscht yesterday. Yeah,  

lots of different things. I think in the US, it's  unusual because we don't have "American cuisine,"  

we don't have a long history of the same type  of food. So I know that when we lived in Korea-

Dan: Sure we do, it's called hot dogs and hamburgers.

Vanessa: But our ancestors 100 years ago, were  

not eating that. It's not like something that's  been passed down. So when we lived in Korea-

Dan: I got some German heritage.

Vanessa: Okay, maybe they've been  

eating sausage for a long time. They ate Korean  food at every meal, and there's no question.

Dan: Yeah, it's very different.

Vanessa: "Are we going to eat  

tacos today? Are we going to eat..." I don't know-

Dan: Miso soup.

Vanessa: "Miso soup. What are we going to eat?" No,  

it was always Korean food. So there's that food  tradition. And so I think in the US, that's a  

pro and a con, that people often struggle with  knowing, "What should I eat? What should I make?"  

And also, maybe not having that food tradition  makes people, this is my theory, more susceptible  

to fad diets, because they don't have a strong  culture of, oh yeah, wheat, rice and kimchi,  

and seaweed every day for breakfast. You're more  susceptible to being, "I'm going to eat four  

pounds of watermelon for breakfast because that's  the new diet." Okay, well, that's not healthy.

Dan: That's Vanessa diet for sure.

Vanessa: Well, I do love watermelon,  

that was an example. But anyway, so that's  stuff that we make. And I think we spend a  

lot of time cooking, but we try to include our  kids, and we try to prioritize healthy food,  

eating together. It seems hectic  sometimes, but trying to slow  

down and prioritize those essentials in  life, especially when our kids are young,

Dan: You try to include the kids.

Vanessa: I try to include kids.

Dan: I'm like,  

"No, I need to be able to chop something  without cutting off a finger or whatnot."

Vanessa: Yeah. It is definitely  

a specific task to try to cook with children.  You have to manage them, it's not a solo quiet-

Dan: On your average day,  

it's not something I want to do just because  it's the end of the day kind of thing.

Vanessa: Yeah, that makes  

sense. All right, let's go to the next question,  this is a fun one, "What meals make your family  

say that they think they've died and gone to  heaven?" So what's our family's favorite meals?

Dan: For Theo and Freddy, it's half  

of them. They'll be like, "This is amazing.  This is the greatest thing I've ever had."

Vanessa: They love food.

Dan: Yeah, they are very good, non-picky eaters.

Vanessa: Yeah,  

I think there's a term we often say for kids  that they're good eaters. If a kid is not picky,  

we'd say, "Oh, they're such good eaters. I'm so  grateful." And that's true for our kids. They  

ate everything. We made borsch yesterday, and they  said, "This is so good. I love this." And I think-

Dan: I'm trying  

to remember the last thing they were  like, "This is the best thing ever."

Vanessa: I think the  

only meals they don't like...  Theo doesn't like fried rice.

Dan: He doesn't like shiitake mushrooms.

Vanessa: He doesn't like shiitake mushrooms-

Dan: ... or  

mushrooms in general. Oh,  they really like my pizza.

Vanessa: Yeah, your pizza-

Dan: Hard not to like that.

Vanessa: ... they love miso,  

they love tacos, they love soups, and  salads, and they'll grab handfuls of  

anything in the garden, like raw kale and  cabbage. They'll just grab it and eat it.

Dan: Yeah, they enjoy  

it a lot more if they pick it themselves.

Vanessa: Yeah. And they say, "Oh, there's a bug on  

it. Okay, it doesn't really matter." Yeah, they're  really not picky. And I think for us too, we enjoy  

food. So whenever we go on a date, something  that we like to do is go to a restaurant that  

we enjoy the food. It's special food, food that  we don't cook at home, because we cook a lot of  

special food at home. So something that's unique  and different, and that's an interest for us as  

adults. So I think it's something fun to share  with our kids that, "Oh, we're excited to try  

this." And they're actually excited too. That's  nice. So we'll see for our baby. Hopefully, she's  

not picky too. Hopefully, she loves food. We'll  see. All right, let's go to the next one. This is  

the last question about food. It is, "What is your  favorite type/style of coffee to drink daily?"

Dan: Oh, coffee.

Vanessa: This is for you.

Dan: We're going to coffee.

Vanessa: Yeah. What kind  

of coffee, type or style of coffee do you like?

Dan: So I like a medium roast coffee. Yeah,  

right in the middle. And I like Colombian  coffees. It's a very cliche kind of coffee.

Vanessa: For reference, if someone doesn't know anything  

about any of those, what would you label Starbucks  as? Because most people are familiar with-

Dan: Burnt. They just... over roasted. Yeah.

Vanessa: Okay. So it's like dark, dark, dark, roast.

Dan: They have a couple that are okay, but for  

the most part, if you want to make Starbucks taste  any good, you got to put a bunch of stuff in it.

Vanessa: That's what people usually do.

Dan: And that's what a lot of  

people who go to Starbucks do. Although  there are some people who like dark roast  

and they just... I don't know. Like my dad,  his taste buds have been burnt for ages,  

and so he'll drink just about any coffee and be  like, "Yeah, it's coffee." I feel a little bit  

like that sometimes too. Coffee drinkers, if you  need coffee, you just go and get coffee, right?

Vanessa: I've definitely  

seen you drink gas station coffee before on a-

Dan: Yeah, and I like it  

too. But I pictured gas station coffee  like it's been made in a lab somewhere,  

and they're like, "How can we make this a  little more appealing to the truck drivers?"  

They drop in a little something. It has  that flavor to it. Gas station coffee.

Vanessa: Well, I don't like coffee, so that's it.

Dan: But at home, I like a  

variety, but yeah, I like typically Colombian  coffee, classic nutty, roasty, chocolatey.

Vanessa: If any of  

you are from Columbia and you want to send Dan  whole roasted coffee beans, he would love that.

Dan: 

Actually, the coffee from Costa Rica  was very good too. You even liked that.

Vanessa: Yeah. I was going to say,  

the only time I've ever liked coffee and  drank a full cup of coffee, because in the US,  

we don't just have little espresso shots  of coffee, we have full cups of coffee-

Dan: Well, people do the little K-cup things.

Vanessa: Well,  

it becomes a big cup though in the end. It becomes  a mug of coffee. I'm thinking about how in Italy,  

there's just a little tiny espresso,  and that's your coffee for the day.

Dan: That drove me nuts.  

In Italy, it's like, "I want  coffee. Can I have a coffee?  

Can I get your biggest coffee?" And it'd  be like, this is their biggest coffee.

Vanessa: It's like the most American thing ever.

Dan: Yeah, I was very American. Yes.

Vanessa: Well,  

at the farm we stayed at in Costa  Rica, they grew their own coffee beans,  

and something about it was just perfect,  it was smooth, it wasn't bitter.

Dan: Not too acidic.

Vanessa: Not too acidic, I think that's  

the big thing. And I don't like the way that  coffee makes me feel. The amount of caffeine is  

just too much for me. I drink tea, I drink black  tea, and that has caffeine in it. But coffee on  

a regular basis, makes me feel too jittery and  anxious. And I've met other people like this,  

and it's like my soulmates, we just understand  that feeling. Because a lot of people that drink  

coffee regularly, like you, you're like, "I don't  know what that feels like. What do you mean?"

Dan: I'm very acclimated, I guess.

Vanessa: Yeah, I think so. So anyway,  

that's my answer is, only the coffee from  a specific farm in Costa Rica, otherwise-

Dan: Must be grown in your backyard in Costa Rica.

Vanessa: Yes,  

I'm the pickiest of all. All right,  let's go to our next category,  

which are questions about hobbies and activities.  The first question is, "Do you have much time  

for reading?" What goes along with that is,  "What's the last book you read?" And there's  

a couple others that are just questions for me.  Yeah. Do you have much time for reading, Dan?

Dan: Yeah, technically, I do.

Vanessa: What was the last book you read?

Dan: 

Oh, goodness, it's probably a nonfiction book  of some kind. I don't know, I haven't finished  

a book in a long time, honestly. I start a lot of  books, and then I scan the footnotes and all that.

Vanessa: That's okay. I read enough for four people.

Dan: Yeah. Honestly, I don't read that much,  

but I like reading when I do, I just don't. I  just tend to watch videos and do other stuff.

Vanessa: Yeah. Yeah. Take care of kids.

Dan: 

Well, yeah, there's that too. I listen  to audiobooks, children's audiobooks,  

with my son. And I read a lot of stories to  them, but these are children's books. Yeah,  

I don't really even remember the last book I  read. But I am going in blind on these questions.

Vanessa: If you think of it later, let us know.

Dan: Okay. But  

I do know somebody who reads  a lot, and that's my wife.

Vanessa: That's me.  

So I think at any given time, I'm  probably reading three books. Right now,  

I just finished listening to one of the most  amazing books that I've ever listened to.

Dan: Oh, yeah,  

she tells me all about them too,  so I don't need to read them.

Vanessa: Yeah, he reads vicariously  

through me. So this book is actually one that I  want to listen to together. It's called Endurance,  

and it's about Earnest Shackleton's failed  Antarctic exploration. And it's considered  

the greatest survival story of all time, and it  is so incredibly unbelievable. It is 100% true.  

It includes so many of their diary segments,  so their individual thoughts, and their words,  

and the way that the guy reads it, he's such a  good reader. I think reading the book yourself  

would be nice, but the way that his voice... he  has a different accent for each of the people  

because they're from a lot of different British  Isles countries, another guy's from Australia  

in the story. So he just reads it so well. So if  you have, for example, like an Audible account,  

I highly recommend listening to Endurance,  about Ernest Shackleton. It's so good.

Dan: So you're  

counting that as reading, even  though you listened to it?

Vanessa: Yes, it is consuming a book, not just short form  

content, like an article or something like that.  Yeah, I read a lot. I feel like the times that I  

read a lot are when I'm nursing. Because I have a  small baby, so I nurse her a lot, and oftentimes,  

while I'm nursing her, she's almost asleep.  So if the other children are taken care of,  

and I'm not trying to nurse her and take care  of them, if I'm in the quiet of the bedroom,  

I have a Kindle, which is great, it has a little  light. So I can read on my Kindle and I have 30  

minutes, maybe 15 minutes sometimes, and I  can read my book, or I deleted social media  

stuff off of my phone. So that really helped. I  upped my reading when I did that because I found  

myself just in those spare moments, especially  because my life is so busy, there's just always  

kids and there's work, and then there's our house. There's always something demanding my attention,  

that in those precious free moments, my animal  brain just wanted a hit of dopamine. Like,  

"Oh, watch a YouTube video." "Oh, look at social  media." And it was difficult to resist. So I had  

an interesting conversation with my sister, and we  both decided just to delete all social media off  

our phones. And both of us since then have read so  much. It was like as if this veil had been lifted,  

and all of a sudden, you have more time than  you think you do. So if you're feeling like  

you don't have much time to learn English, maybe  you do, just delete social media off your phone,  

and watch my YouTube videos on your  computer, on a laptop, and something that's-

Dan: Have YouTube somewhere.

Vanessa: Something that's not instantly accessible,  

something where you have to consciously choose  to sit down and open it up. I think the phone is  

the dangerous part, that has helped me so much to  have time to read, and I read so many books now.  

I'm also reading another book called Braiding  Sweetgrass. I'm reading another book called The  

Highly Sensitive Person, which is a psychology  book. A lot going on. And depending on, "Oh,  

I feel like reading this now. I feel like  reading this." I've got lots of options.

Dan: Well, if we're counting audiobooks,  

the last impactful audiobook I listened to  with Theo was Little House on the Prairie.

Vanessa: Classic.

Dan: Yeah. And we  

started Anne of Green Gables too, but that one  was a little bit over his head. Very verbose.

Vanessa: Yeah,  

it's probably better for a  10-year-old than a 6-year-old.

Dan: Yeah.  

But Little House on the Prairie, that was  very entertaining for an adult, I think.

Vanessa: Yeah, I love those books.

Dan: Very  

historically interesting, and all  that. So yeah, that was great.

Vanessa: There's a  

part two to this question, which  is talking about reading. It says,  

"Do you have time to read your students' comments?  Do you consider this distracting or extra work?"

Dan: I don't.

Vanessa: You don't read the comments. I  

feel like reading YouTube comments, I generally  read the comments on the most recent videos,  

and I don't read 100% of the comments, but I  read most of them and respond to some of them-

Dan: I have noticed,  

going to some videos, I see your  responses more than your average YouTuber.

Vanessa: Yeah. I try to  

respond to 10 comments or so for all the videos.  And yeah, I enjoy reading them. I don't read them  

for hours every day. And it says, "Do you consider  it distracting or extra work?" I try to consider  

everything related to my job to be work, and it  doesn't mean it has to be annoying or difficult  

work, but I try my best. I don't always succeed.  I try to separate my personal life from my work.  

So when I'm spending time with my kids, I'm not  looking at the YouTube comments on my video,  

or when I'm cooking, I'm not spending time looking  at the comments on YouTube, or if I'm waiting to  

pick up my kid from school, I'm not looking at  the comments. I only do that during my work time. 

And I think that really helps me to just feel more  at ease. Because I'm really good at multitasking,  

but after I multitask, I feel really  totally beat, just really drained of  

energy. Because I've been working so hard  to multitask and do all these things,  

so it's better for me, and I think  it's better for the people around me,  

if I focus on one thing instead of trying to do  it all at the same time. So if that makes sense.

Dan: Yeah. I would say, Vanessa probably has less  

interest in YouTube comments than probably your  average YouTuber. You don't seem to really care  

that much about what people say, positively. She's  not looking for praise is what I'm trying to say.

Vanessa: I feel like I try not to base my worth,  

my individual personal worth, on the comments  and other people's opinions. I appreciate when  

people write nice comments... and especially my  favorite types of comments are when people say,  

"I've been watching your videos and my English has  improved," that is my goal as a teacher, I want  

you to improve. So when I see that kind of change  and the dedication of watching and studying,  

and that something that I provided actually helped  you, that makes me feel really good. So I think  

that detailed personal type of comment is really  important to me. But it is true, I try not to-

Dan: I don't  

want to make it sound like you don't care at all.

Vanessa: Yeah. I'm not  

the kind of person that's like,  "Oh, we got 3000 likes, yay."

Dan: That's what I mean.

Vanessa: Yeah. Those  

kinds of social media markers don't matter  to me as much, but personal change, that's  

really special. So please keep sharing things  like that. The next question is mainly for me,  

"How do you have time to prepare videos  and still be present with your family?"

Dan: I ask that all the time, honestly.

Vanessa: So the question is, how is your work  

life balance? How do you work and have a family?  I think the only way that my job still exists with  

having kids is that there's other people on my  team who help to make that happen. So there's  

someone who helps with my emails, there's someone  who helps to edit the PDFs that are downloaded for  

free for you, you can download today's free  PDF, there's someone who helps to edit these  

videos. All of that makes it possible because  I don't have 40 hours every day to do it all.

Dan: Yeah.  

Her team used to be me, but since we've  changed that, it's gotten better actually.

Vanessa: Well,  

I've certainly been able to diversify. Different  people can specialize in different types of  

jobs. So that really helps everything to  run smoothly. Before this school year,  

my three-year-old went to preschool this year  for the first time. So he's at school from nine  

to one o'clock. Before that, we had a babysitter  come over to our house for three mornings a week,  

9 o'clock to 12 o'clock for three mornings a week.  So I had, what is that, nine hours? Nine hours to  

work every week. Sometimes it wasn't exactly  nine hours, sometimes it was like seven hours.

Dan: Well, that's  

not including anything in the evening that you do.

Vanessa: Yeah. My goal is to  

try to not work in the evening after the kids go  to bed, but sometimes I would be pressed to have  

to do that. And now, I try to delegate tasks. That  means give tasks to other people so that I'm not  

feeling too overwhelmed, or stressed, and I can  focus on the things that I do best, like making  

these videos for you. The next question goes also  with managing, but it involves you, "With managing  

your house, YouTube channel, your teaching  job, and kids, do you have time to work out?"

Dan: Oh, work out,  

huh? Actually, yes. So lately, I have  been running, which is pretty new for me.

Vanessa: It's been a couple of months.

Dan: Yeah, I've slacked a bit lately, but-

Vanessa: When the  

time changed and it got dark early,  that made it really hard for you.

Dan: Yeah. I  

don't like running in the pitch black, but-

Vanessa: There's a lot of bears where we live.

Dan: Yeah, I have time for sure. It's  

obviously hard to find the motivation sometimes  after a long day. That's the main thing. But I  

found that if I go for a run and I just start,  it actually feels good. Especially if I'm like,  

"I'm going to put on some headphones," or  even if just to get some fresh air and-

Vanessa: You're actually alone.

Dan: I don't  

want this to sound like I want to  be away from my kids, but sometimes,  

when you go for a run and they're not  there, it's kind of nice. So, yeah.

Vanessa: That's how I feel about going to the  

gym. So last year, I was pregnant for the whole  year. And then when our baby was born in June,  

I had some recovery time over the summer. And then  at the end of the summer, I started going to the  

gym a couple of times a week. I got sick for a  little bit and had to take a pause. But I think  

this same idea of doing something by yourself...  When you're surrounded by people a lot-

Dan: When you're a parent-

Vanessa: ... or your job  

is teaching with lots of kids, and your  responsibilities are just pulling at you all  

the time, going to the gym and just listening  to music, or an audiobook, like I like to do,  

and running or lifting some weights, it  feels actually pretty calming, like a break-

Dan: You might go to the gym  

and find Vanessa just punching a punching  bag. I didn't know she had that in her.

Vanessa: It feels  

really good to just be... especially at night  when it's dark outside and I go to the gym,  

it's just around the corner from our house,  and I see other people out, and I think, "Oh,  

it's only eight o'clock, but other people's  days is not ending. It's going still." Yeah,  

it's really nice, I think, to be able to do  something like that, especially when you're  

around a lot of people all day. All right, next  question. "What kind of weather do you like?"

Dan: Sunny weather. I mean, really.

Vanessa: Yeah. Where we live,  

it's really mild. So our summers are hot,  but one hour south from where we live,  

in South Carolina where I grew up, it's like  10 degrees hotter all the time, in Fahrenheit.

Dan: It feels significant. Yeah.

Vanessa: Yeah. So here, it's pretty mild.  

We get a couple of days of snow in the winter,  but it's pretty good. You get a couple of weeks  

where it feels like spring in the middle of winter  too, so it's not unbearable, where you get snow  

in October and the snow doesn't melt until May.  We don't live somewhere like that, thankfully.

Dan: Yeah. To  

put a little more detail on it, I like  mild weather. I don't like anything too  

hot or too cold. Although a nice snowy day  is fun, but it's only fun twice. But yeah,  

a little bit of clouds in the sky to  give you some shade every now and then.

Vanessa: Yeah. Nice little breeze.

Dan: Breezy.

Vanessa: Yeah, not too many mosquitoes.

Dan: No mosquitoes yet.

Vanessa: Basically,  

perfect, that would be nice. All right,  next question. Going from outside to inside,  

"What kind of movies do you watch?" This is  what kind of movies do you watch on Netflix,  

but what kind of movies do you watch,  TV shows do you watch? Stuff like that.

Dan: Oh, TV shows too?

Vanessa: Movies, TV shows, media.

Dan: Yeah, we don't really watch movies.

Vanessa: I was trying  

to think of the last movie that we saw.

Dan: Man. Well,  

so I'm not the most fun person to watch a movie  with, I think. I tend to have trouble not making  

comments during the movie, especially  one-on-one with... Sometimes it's fun.

Vanessa: 

Yeah. I can't remember the last movie  that we watched. Probably a kids movie.

Dan: Oh, I know what it was, it was the Bohemian  

Rhapsody one, the Freddie Mercury one. And I was  quiet for it, I didn't make too many comments.

Vanessa: How did you enjoy it?

Dan: It was okay.

Vanessa: Okay. All right. That's a glowing review from Dan.

Dan: I'm a bit of a  

tough critic, except for silly humor. So we  watched Bob's Burgers, a silly cartoon on-

Vanessa: We watched the Great British baking show.

Dan: ... Hulu, and we watched The  

Great British baking show.

Vanessa: It's a tongue twister.

Dan: Yeah.  

And that's just fun. I don't  know, I like stuff like that.

Vanessa: Yeah, I think we don't really-

Dan: Let's have a little more low  

commitment too. You don't have to  watch a movie a really long movie.

Vanessa: Yeah. Especially at the end of the day,  

when our kids go to bed and it's eight o'clock,  a movie's like two hours. I don't want to watch  

something for two hours. So I think when our  kids get older and they want to watch movies, I  

will enjoy watching movies with them. But at this  point, they don't watch movies, so it's kind of-

Dan: Yeah, unless it's Thomas the Tank Engine.

Vanessa: It's not  

really a movie movie. So I feel like,  yeah, we don't really watch an awful lot  

of movies or TV shows, but I do watch  YouTube videos and stuff like that.

Dan: Yeah. I also don't  

like modern Hollywood movies. I just don't like  how they feel. I don't like the way the action...  

Something happens and it's not explained, and it's  too much... I don't know, it's not a clear vision.

Vanessa: Well,  

I have a recommendation for you, or a request  for you. If you have a movie that you love,  

let us know in the comments, and maybe  it's a movie that we could watch-

Dan: And just disregard my opinion.

Vanessa: ... and we could  

enjoy. So if there's something that you think  we should watch, let us know in the comments  

because we're not the experts when it comes  to movies and TV shows. I think most of the  

movies that I like are not ones that I watch  regularly, but classic movies that I like,  

I don't know, like Forrest Gump, or Shawshank  Redemption, stuff like that. That's classics.

Dan: Yeah. The  

last time I went through a movie phase, the  movie Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind-

Vanessa: In college?

Dan: Yeah.

Vanessa: 15 years ago.

Dan: Was  

like a semi modern movie that  I thought was cool and I liked.

Vanessa: Yeah, I enjoyed watching that. We watched that  

one a lot in college. All right, let's go to our  next question, which is... oh, we only have two  

more questions, we're almost there. "What do you  do in your free time with the kids?" So there's a  

little bit of a weirdness to this question because  it doesn't feel like free time when you're with  

the kids. Free time is when it's quiet and you're  by yourself, and you can do whatever you want. But  

I understand, it means when you're not cooking,  or taking them to school, and stuff like that.

Dan: When you're just having fun with your kids.

Vanessa: What do we do  

as a family? What kind of free  time things do we do as a family?

Dan: Yeah. Well, for my children,  

even when you're having free time with them,  a lot of times it's child management. Like  

my youngest son, he needs some physical time, so  I'll wrestle with him, I'll throw him on the bed,  

and whatnot. So he needs a little bit of that. And  Theo will jump in sometimes too. But Theo's a lot  

more crafty. So he likes to do puzzles, and play  board games, and stuff like that... and color,  

color, color, color. And so I'll sit down and do  that with him a lot of times. Although you usually  

do that with him because the other one needs some  action, or he might go a little crazy on you.

Vanessa: So usually, Dan is throwing  

Freddie on the bed while I am coloring with Theo.  I would say, also, we do lots of, I would say,  

dirt stuff, like digging in the dirt, planting  things, pulling weeds, walking in the woods,  

and uncovering things under the leaves, this kind  of earthy play. Which is also, it's something that  

we like to do, but I think that that is usually  when we go outside and we try to be outside,  

like 80% of the day at home, we're outside a  lot. And we're really lucky, we have a nice  

yard and area that we can play in. The last couple  of days, our kids spent hours digging a trench and  

filling it with water, and pulling up the mud,  and making a mud wall. And at the same time,  

I was weeding the garden, pulling up weeds  and preparing it for the winter. And you were-

Dan: Sometimes, they help us a little bit.

Vanessa: Yeah, it's like being together in the same area-

Dan: It improves their mood to be outside as well.

Vanessa: Yeah. Yeah. I think  

when I want to do something fun with the kids,  usually, we'll go to a park that has nature,  

so like a creek, and you'll skip rocks,  and the kids will splash in the creek,  

and I'll be with the baby, or you'll  be with the baby, and we'll play.

Dan: Yeah. They love  

going to a creek, playing in water, in general.

Vanessa: Yeah. I think it's not really my favorite thing to  

do kid specific things, like go to a kid's museum,  or go to... I don't know, even a playground  

is okay. Our kids don't really playgrounds  that much, I think they're more into go see-

Dan: They go all around  

where the other stuff around the playground.

Vanessa: ... go see the ducks by the lake.

Dan: They like swings a lot, though.

Vanessa: Swings are okay. Yeah,  

I think that those really busy type of  places where there's just so many activities,  

you could do painting here, and then  there's light shine things here,  

and there's animal puppets here, like kids  museums, I feel overwhelmed, my kids feel  

overwhelmed... Can you guess why I'm reading  the book The Highly Sensitive Person? And yeah,  

afterwards, they just cry, or fuss, and it's no  good. That's not fun for anyone. So generally,  

the slower activities, invite a friend to go on  a hike with us, that type of stuff is generally  

what I prefer to do. Yeah, that's about it.  All right, are you ready for the last question?

Dan: I'm ready.

Vanessa: Drum roll...  

"Do you feel like you're a different  woman after having three children?"

Dan: Oh,  

yes I do, as a matter of fact. After the  third, I finally became a woman. Yes.

Vanessa: This question is obviously for me,  

but they gave some very specific things here.  "Do you feel like you're a different woman after  

having three kids, more mature, more empathetic,  changes in your hobbies, media, daily decisions-

Dan: Estrogen levels."

Vanessa: It is true  

that they say that when a man is near  a baby, or you're around children,  

that your testosterone levels go down, and  you thus become more caring and tender.

Dan: One might say, womanly.

Vanessa: Ooh. All right. So yes,  

the answer is obviously, yes, I am a different  woman after having three kids. But I think  

there's a really beautiful, I don't know if  it's a proverb, or a phrase that I've heard,  

that when a baby is born, a mother is born too. So  it's like this page turning event. And I remember,  

when we were taking a birth class for our first  son, when I was pregnant with our first son,  

the teacher, she gave this idea of thinking about  your life, different events that you felt were a  

before and after. So maybe it was like your first  day of school was really impressionable for you,  

and you felt like that was a big change for you,  or maybe when you first went to high school,  

you thought, "I have my little friends and  it's fine." Then you went to high school,  

and there was a big school and you just felt  really different, or you move to a new city.  

Those are kind of these page turning events. And she framed it as, when you have,  

especially your first child, a page has been  turned. And there's no going back, there's no  

changing. There's a lot of obviously physical  changes, and emotional, and hormonal changes,  

but it's also just you're a different person. You  are still you, but this page has turned, and you  

are Vanessa, the mother. So yeah, I think that's  the positive way to look at your life is not the  

same, you are not the same, but there's a lot of  these instances in life that change you, and it's  

your choice if they will change you for the better  or the worse, and so you try to make the most of  

it. So yes, I would say I'm a different person.  I'm still me, but I am a different flavor of me.  

Yeah. Do you think that I am a different woman  after having three kids, or just kids in general?

Dan: Certainly, kids. Yeah. After the third... Well,  

because pregnancy is so difficult for you, I  think you just seem like you have a burden lifted.

Vanessa: Yeah, not being pregnant is great.

Dan: Yeah. But  

as far as a third child... I don't know.  I can only speak for myself because it  

just feels like our family's complete. She's  like the little cherry on top to our family.

Vanessa: Oh, our baby.

Dan: Yeah, she's  

really sweet. But yeah, I can't say for the third  child that I've noticed a huge change in you.

Vanessa: Yeah. I think the biggest change is having  

your first kid. Just going from not being a mother  to being a mother, that's the biggest change.

Dan: Yeah, for sure.

Vanessa: All right,  

well thank you so much for joining  me for all of these questions.

Dan: You're welcome.

Vanessa: If you have other questions that  

we have not answered, this is your challenge, in  the comments, ask us a question about daily life,  

daily routines. Maybe you have questions about  life in the US, maybe you have questions about  

us personally that we can answer from our own  personal experiences. Leave that in the comments,  

and maybe we'll make another video like this.  And there will be a vocabulary version of this  

video coming out in a few weeks. So all of  the expressions that you saw come up here,  

I will be explaining those in that vocabulary  video. So make sure you subscribe to the Speak  

English with Vanessa YouTube channel so that  you can get a notification when that video  

goes live. Boost your vocabulary, your skills,  have great conversation skills, you can do it. 

And don't forget to download the free PDF  worksheet, here on Dan's face, with all of  

the great questions that you all asked today,  the vocabulary, the definitions, extra sample  

sentences so that you can use them yourself. And  at the bottom of this free PDF worksheet, you can  

answer Vanessa's challenge question, so that you  never forget what you've learned. You can click on  

the link in the description to download that free  PDF worksheet today. Well, thank you so much, Dan.

Dan: You're welcome.

Vanessa: We've been on a journey today.

Dan: Yes. It was fun. I liked going in blind.

Vanessa: Oh,  

yeah. Okay. Well, maybe we'll do this  again, let us know. Thanks so much,  

and I'll see you again next Friday for a  new lesson here on my YouTube channel. Bye.

Dan: Bye.

Vanessa: But wait, do you want more? I  

recommend watching this video next, a conversation  with Dan about education. Do you know why Dan did  

not go to school until he was 13 years old?  Find out in that video and I'll see you there.