ENGLISH MASTERCLASS | 36 THINGS YOU MUST STOP DOING IN ORDER TO IMPROVE YOUR ENGLISH FLUENCY

Let's jump right in.

Phrase number one, you must stop saying this English phrase.

The phrase is I'm never going to learn English.

I get it.

I understand that as you're on this English journey, you

are going to have hard days.

And I know that English is a challenging language to learn.

I've seen thousands of students go through this very situation

where they say this to themselves.

I'm never going to learn English.

I'm just not good enough.

I keep trying, but I'm not improving.

I'm just never going to learn English.

You have, you have to stop saying this to yourself.

Why am I telling you to stop saying this?

Stop saying this.

Because it's not true with time and dedication.

Anyone listen closely.

I am so passionate about this.

Anyone can learn English and improve their language skills.

I have a gentleman that just joined my academy.

He's a part of our family and the speak English with Tiffany Academy.

He is 75 years old.

I have another student who's 65 years old.

It doesn't matter how old you are.

It doesn't matter where you live.

It doesn't matter what your current situation is.

You can learn English.

So my friend.

The first thing I need you to stop saying is I'm never going to learn English.

Don't say this ever again.

Number two, the second thing I need you to stop saying to never say is.

My English is so terrible.

I've heard students say this over and over again, and I've watched

how detrimental it is to them.

I've watched the words literally come out of their mouth and

their confidence go down with it.

Literally having a conversation and they'll say, ah, my English is so

terrible, their shoulders start to drop, their head starts to go low.

They start to look insecure.

My English is so, so terrible.

Stop saying this.

Why stop saying this because negative talk can lower your confidence

and make it harder to improve.

I want you to understand why I'm so passionate, why I'm so passionate

about this specific lesson, where I'm teaching you the nine phrases you must

Stop saying, because I have literally watched students come to me, join my

academy, join my programs, and they, they were telling themselves, I'm not

good at English, my English is terrible.

I'm never going to learn English.

Shoulders down, head down, lacking confidence.

Then two months later, speaking with confidence, shoulders back, head

up, and telling new students, Hey, never say your English is terrible.

Hey, never say you can't do it.

Believe in yourself.

The same student that I was encouraging now, encouraging another student.

Listen, when you stop saying this phrase, your confidence will go

up and your English will improve.

You are smarter than you realize.

I'm talking to you.

Yes.

The individual, right?

Yes.

Right here with me.

You are smarter than you realize.

So the moment you stop saying to yourself, my English is bad.

My English is terrible.

My English is just, it's just not good.

The moment you stop saying that is the moment your English will start

improving because you're telling yourself, wait a minute, wait a minute.

Wait a minute.

I

can do better.

My English is not bad.

Stop telling yourself.

Okay.

Stop saying to yourself that your English is terrible.

Number three, the third thing I need you to stop saying right now is I'll never

be able to understand native speakers.

I've heard this thousands of times.

I'll never be able to understand native speakers.

Now this comes from watching television, watching movies, listening to podcasts

and missing a few words, missing an expression, missing a colloquialism,

a slang term, missing the pacing.

Let me ask you this question right now.

Do you know where I'm from?

It's okay.

You can answer.

Do you know where I'm from?

That's right.

I'm from America.

Do you know what my mother tongue, my first language is?

You got it.

English.

That makes me what?

A native speaker.

And you are understanding me.

Come on.

I need you to realize what I'm realizing about you.

I see your potential.

I know that you can achieve your English goals.

You have to believe it.

So you have to stop saying to yourself, I'll never be able to understand native

speakers, teacher, Tiffany, I am a native speaker and you understand me.

So immediately this statement needs to go out the window.

You can understand native speakers.

There might be a time when a native speaker says something

that you don't catch.

There are some things that native speakers say that I'm like, what?

And I'm a native speaker.

Why?

Because we have different accents, different parts of America.

Sound people sound different.

From the South to the North, to the West, and it's totally okay.

We're human beings.

Stop saying to yourself, I'll never be able to understand native speakers.

Here's the thing.

Stop saying this because with practice and exposure to English speakers, you

can improve your comprehension skills.

I've been told multiple times in the comment section under my YouTube videos.

Tiff, I've been watching your English lessons for months.

When I first started watching your lessons, I missed a few things.

I could understand the majority of what you were saying, but I

didn't understand everything.

However, now I understand everything that you say.

Why I didn't change teacher.

Tiffany didn't change.

You changed.

You started believing that you'd be able to understand what I was saying.

You started enjoying the lessons.

You started relaxing.

You started to encourage yourself and experience this positive English lesson.

Hopefully it's positive for you, right?

Yeah.

We'll smile.

So it's all about how you're thinking.

So stop saying I'll never be able to understand native speakers.

Again, I am passionate when it comes to this topic of negative

speaking or discouragement.

I'm really passionate about this.

And the reason is because many times, and I'll pause real quick.

We're going to get to number four.

Don't worry.

Many times what happens with English learners, you probably included

the the hiccup, the barrier.

The stop in your journey that you're experiencing has nothing

to do with your intelligence.

Has nothing to do with the difficulty of English.

It has all to do with the way that you're viewing yourself.

Listen to me, you're beating yourself up because you're not learning as

fast as John or Samantha over there.

You're frustrated because you don't think you speak like a native speaker.

Just yet.

You don't sound the way you'd like to sound.

You make mistakes and you, you get upset with yourself.

It's all about how you're feeling about yourself.

If I, and this is one of my main goals.

If I can help you feel confident, if I can help you overcome the negative

thoughts, overcome the negative feelings, then I have done my job.

You are intelligent.

You already speak another language, your mother tongue, and you're

listening to a woman speak in another language and your understanding.

Believe that you are intelligent.

Believe that you are amazing.

If I can help you, if I can help anybody find more confidence,

be more confident in themselves.

I have done my job.

I have done my job and I'll be full of overwhelming joy.

My goal is to help you be more confident in yourself.

Yes.

I'm teaching you English, but I've realized my purpose is so

much bigger than words on a page.

My purpose is to help you believe in yourself.

Believe in yourself and I'll give you tools along the way, teaching

you English words, expressions, some tips and tricks, five W's.

But if I can help you be confident in yourself, listen, you'll

transfer that to your children.

You'll transfer that to your friends.

We affect each other.

I want you to believe in yourself.

This wasn't even in my notes.

This wasn't a part of the lesson.

It's just something that I'm so passionate about.

I want you to believe.

In your self and in believing yourself, there are things you have to stop saying.

Number four, stop saying, I'll always make grammar mistakes.

Listen closely.

No matter who you are, yes, mistakes will be made, but this statement right

here, when you say it to yourself.

It has a negative effect.

Listen very closely.

I want you to stop saying this because everyone makes grammar mistakes,

even native speakers practice and improving your grammar takes time.

So this is very different from saying, Hey, I'm always going

to make grammar mistakes.

It's okay.

Let me just keep working.

That's a positive statement.

What I'm speaking about is this statement.

I'm

always going to make grammar mistakes.

I mean, I try my hardest and I, I just always make grammar mistakes.

That feels different.

Doesn't it?

That's what I'm talking about.

The negative self talk.

I, I mean, there's, I've tried hard and I just, I'm always

going to make grammar mistakes.

Stop saying that.

Stop saying that.

Number five, and I want you to be writing these things down so

that you'll stop saying them.

Number five, why can't I speak English fluently like everyone else?

Let me say this.

You are not everyone else.

You are unique.

God made you special.

You are one of a kind with that in mind, you can not compare

yourself to anyone else.

For example, I'm an English teacher.

I teach English online.

There are tons and tons of other English teachers online.

Absolutely amazing English teachers.

I'm not like them and they're not like me.

We are individually.

Amazing.

I'm including all of us, right?

Amazing English teachers.

We each have our own unique skills.

We can help students in our own unique ways.

So I'm not comparing myself to any other English teacher.

Why?

They're awesome.

They're amazing.

And I think I am too.

Why?

Because each and every person living on this earth is awesome is amazing.

We just have to realize it.

So my friend.

My awesome, amazing friend.

I need you to realize it does not matter what anyone else around you is doing.

It doesn't matter what any other English learner is doing.

Stop asking this question.

Why can't I speak English fluently?

Like them focused on your journey?

Why everyone learns and improves.

At their own pace.

Don't compare yourself to others.

You're not like anyone else.

You are uniquely you.

You are special.

Be patient with yourself and learn at your own pace.

You got me good.

The sixth saying that I want you to stop saying is I'll never be able to

pronounce English words correctly.

Don't say that.

Don't say that ever again.

I've had so many students who have improved their

pronunciation with practice.

Right.

They dug deep.

Like you talked about in our last lesson and they improved their pronunciation.

Don't think it's impossible.

It is possible.

Here's the thing.

This is important.

Stop saying this because with practice and specific exercises,

you can improve your pronunciation.

There are many English teachers right now on YouTube that will teach you

how to improve your pronunciation.

One of the teachers I used to recommend my students to all the time.

And even now she's an amazing teacher.

Rachel's English.

What?

Come on now.

Excellent.

You want to improve your pronunciation.

You can improve your pronunciation.

I have an app English with Tiffany app on the app.

Literally there are tons of lessons to help you improve your pronunciation.

It's not impossible.

You just have to find the right tips and techniques that work for you.

Maybe Rachel's lessons will help you.

Maybe my lessons will help you.

Maybe another English teachers lessons will help you.

It's not impossible.

And you have to remember that as you're on this English journey.

Tip number seven.

The thing I need you to stop saying number seven, English is too difficult for me.

You're lying.

Listen, that's a lie.

That's a lie.

Hi, that's a lie.

You are more intelligent than you realize.

You understand what I'm saying right now.

You're understanding the words that are coming out of my mouth.

Proof that you're intelligent.

Do you need extra time?

Possibly it's your journey, but English is not too difficult for you.

Listen to me very closely.

Stop saying this because every language can be challenging to learn.

Korean was not easy.

It was a very difficult language to learn, but it wasn't impossible.

But with time and practice, you can improve, but you have to believe that.

Again, stop saying English is too difficult for me.

Number eight, the next phrase I need you to stop saying is I can't

understand English movies or TV shows.

Stop saying that.

Stop saying, I can't understand.

I can't understand what they're saying or what's going on.

Why do I want you to stop saying this?

With consistent practice, you can improve your listening skills and increase

your comprehension of English media.

Listen, when I first started studying Korean, I was level one.

I was learning the basics, but every day in the background, I would

play Korean dramas, Korean news programs, Korean cooking shows.

I didn't know what they were talking about.

I was a beginner, 99 percent of the show.

I was like.

I don't know that word, don't know that word, but I continue to listen.

And over time I started understanding more why, because with practice, your

listening skills and comprehension of the media will improve.

It's not impossible.

And number nine, the phrase I need you to stop saying to yourself,

I'm too old to learn English now.

At the beginning of this lesson, I told you about two of my students.

One is 75, one is 65.

Now there are a ton of other students that are older, but I mentioned these

two individuals because they're proof.

It does not matter how old you are.

Your brain's still working.

You can still speak.

Can't you?

Then you're never to learn to learn.

You're never too old to learn.

Check this out.

Stop saying this because.

Age is not a barrier to learning a new language.

Like, ah, you 85 now you're done.

No age is not a barrier to learning a new language.

Many people learn languages later in life and find great success in doing so.

You're never too old to learn.

Stop saying this.

The very first thing you must stop saying is my English is bad.

And you're probably smiling or shaking your head because you've said this before.

Oh, I'm sorry.

My, my English is bad.

Why do you need to stop saying this this year?

Here's the reason why you must stop saying this.

When you say my English is bad, this phrase undermines.

Your confidence and also discourages conversation.

What do you mean teacher Tiffany?

Let me explain it more.

The moment you say my English is bad.

Your brain says, okay, well, we're not going to work hard.

We're not going to work hard.

If you already believe that your English is bad, why is your brain going to work

overtime to help you find the words or expressions in your brain's database?

It actually decreases your confidence in yourself.

When you say my English is bad, you're not believing in yourself.

Remember, I tell you all the time I believe in you, but you

have to believe in yourself.

The second thing is it also discourages conversation.

If you start off the conversation by saying my English is bad, well, the person

listening will say, okay, well, we're not going to have a good conversation

because you don't have the ability to express yourself in this language.

So a part of their listening suddenly turns off.

Oh, well, this person can't speak English.

So.

I'll just kind of listen, uh, kind of, and then I'll keep walking.

Don't say my English is bad.

Listen, I'm trying to help you improve your English this year.

I want you to be able to speak English fluently, but you must

stop saying my English is bad.

So what's the alternative?

What should you say?

This is what I want you to say.

I'm still learning English.

So please bear with me.

I love this one.

Hey, I'm still learning English.

So please just bear with me.

In other words, Hey, I'm still on my journey.

I'm still on my journey to speak English fluently.

Would you mind just being patient with me?

I guarantee the response is going to be much different

from, Oh, my English is bad.

Okay.

Well, turn off my ears.

I'm on my English journey.

Would you be patient?

Sure.

I'm going to.

Open my ears even more, pay attention, even more, my friend, stop saying

my English is bad and instead say, I'm still learning English.

Please bear with me.

You got it.

Listen, write this down.

This is going to help you this year.

Let's move on to the second thing.

I need you to stop saying this year.

The second thing is this.

It's too difficult.

It's too difficult.

Stop saying this.

When you say it's too difficult, once again, you're telling your

brain, turn off, I don't need you.

I don't need your effort because this is too hard.

It's too difficult.

English.

I can't do it.

Why do I want you to stop saying this?

Here's the main reason.

When you say this.

It can discourage others and limit personal growth.

Listen closely.

It can discourage others and also limit your personal growth.

What do you mean?

What I'm saying is as human beings, we affect each other.

So the moment you say it's too difficult, the person listening

to you, another English learner, maybe you were their goal.

You were like, Hey, they were like, man, if she can do it, if

he can do it, I know I can do it.

The moment you say it's too difficult, all of a sudden, Well, if it's too

difficult for them, I know I can't do it.

You can not intentionally inadvertently start discouraging someone else.

And also it will limit your own growth.

Similar to the first thing I told you not to say, when you

say this, it's too difficult.

Again, your brain says, well, we're not going to grow in this area

because you believe it's too hard.

Stop believing that stop saying that.

What should you say instead, instead of it's too difficult.

I want you to say this.

I find it challenging.

That's a fact, but I'm willing to figure it out.

Ooh, I get so excited when these are the words that replace the old words.

Listen, I find it challenging.

I'm admitting this is not the easiest.

It is challenging, but I am willing.

To figure it out, listen, my goal is to help you this year.

Speak English fluently.

Do you believe in yourself?

Are you willing to figure it out?

Listen, I feel good.

I hope you feel good.

So again, instead of saying it's too difficult, I want you to say,

I do find it challenging, but I'm willing to figure it out.

You know what?

Say it with me.

I find it challenging, but I'm willing to figure it out.

Yes.

Let's move on.

Number three.

What's the third thing I need you to stop saying this year.

I'll try

once again, I'll try.

You're probably thinking to yourself, wait, why is I'll try

something that I shouldn't say.

Here's the reason.

The phrase leaves room for doubt and uncertainty, doubt and uncertainty.

I'm realizing that this is an English lesson, but also a motivational lesson.

So I'm hoping you're feeling motivated when you say I'll try.

Even watch my body language.

If you're watching this lesson on YouTube, watch my body language.

I'll try.

I don't really believe I can do it per se, but I mean, I

mean, I'll, I'll give it a try.

There's this measure of doubt, this measure of uncertainty, like, ah, I

don't know the a hundreds that believe that I can do it, but I'll try.

So what do I want you to say instead of I'll try, this is what I want you to say.

I will do my best.

Such a different phrase.

I'll try, not sure if it's going to happen, but I mean, I'll

try versus I will do my best.

I'll give it my all.

I'll give 110%.

Listen as your English teacher, and I'm sure, or I hope you guys can feel this.

I hope you realize how passionate I am about helping

you achieve your goal this year.

I'm not trying, I'm doing my best.

I'm giving 110%.

Why?

Because I believe in you.

I am giving my best.

I'm not just, well, I'm trying.

I mean, I'm trying to record a video.

No, when I get in front of this camera, when I get on this microphone, I am

here for you giving my all my friend.

I need you to do the same thing when it comes to your English.

Don't try.

Give your best.

Don't slack off.

Don't be lazy.

You have control of your English journey.

Listen, man, I believe in you so much.

You have the power to take yourself to the next level.

Why you have a teacher who cares about you.

I care about you.

We've never met in person probably, but I care about you.

And now I just need you to believe in yourself.

Do your best, give your best, and I guarantee you will see results.

So stop saying I'll try and instead say, I'll do my best.

You got it.

Ooh, I felt that one.

I felt that one.

Here we go.

Number four.

I need you to stop saying this.

Stop saying.

It's impossible.

Stop saying it's impossible.

It's not again.

I'm your English teacher.

English is my first language.

Yes.

I understand that, but I have watched too many students do what

you might think is impossible.

It doesn't matter your age.

I don't care if you're 75 years old.

It's not impossible.

I don't care if you've been studying English for 25 years.

It's not impossible.

Here's the reason I need you to stop saying this.

This phrase can indicate a closed mindset and lack of creativity, a closed mindset.

Nope.

Hey, I'm done.

I mean, it's impossible.

It's impossible for me to speak English fluently.

Why am I trying?

That's a closed mindset.

And it also shows a lack of creativity.

You see, here's the truth of the matter.

As human beings, we all learn differently.

We each have a different learning style.

Some people are visual.

Some people need to hear things auditory, right?

Some people simply need a book and they can read it and boom, they get it.

But just because what you've been doing now has not worked,

it doesn't mean it's impossible.

You just need to get creative and find another way.

Way of studying my goal as an English teacher is to hopefully provide you

with various methods, different ways of studying English that are more

enjoyable, that are creative to help you move forward along your journey.

To speaking English fluently.

So stop saying it's impossible instead.

Here's the alternative.

It seems challenging.

You want to acknowledge?

Yes.

I mean, it's a fact.

It seems challenging, but let me look for possible solutions.

Listen, I've been studying English for 15 years.

It's I'm not going to lie to you.

It it's challenging, but I'm willing to look for possible solutions.

There has to be another way to do what I'm doing.

People are speaking English fluently.

There's a way to get moving, to move forward on my journey.

I'm willing to look for possible solutions.

Man, I can't wait for the day when I can meet you in person.

And see all of the changes, all of the improvements witness in person,

your English speaking ability.

When you stop saying it's impossible and start saying, Hey, it's, it's challenging.

Yes, but I'm looking and willing to look for possible solutions.

That's called confidence, baby.

You can have confidence as a beginner, as an intermediate and

as an advanced English learner.

Listen, believe in yourself, wherever you are on your journey.

It's challenging, but I'm willing to look for some possible solutions.

You, you better say it, be confident in yourself.

Here we go.

Number five, number five.

The fifth thing I need you to stop saying, I don't need help.

I'm good.

I'm good.

I can do it on my own.

I don't need help.

Let me say this wasn't even planned, not in my notes at all.

When you say I don't need help, you are limiting yourself in so many different

ways, I'm your English teacher, and I'm going to be very transparent right now.

I'm going to be very honest with you.

I'm building this community, right?

We have this YouTube family, a YouTube community.

I have my Academy with my family.

Uh, students are called my family.

Again, you can join the Academy if you'd like links in the description, but the

purpose of what I'm saying right now is.

In the community, right?

Family members among the family members, the students that I teach,

there's a select group, student leaders, and you guys know who you are.

I have student leaders and they help manage our family.

I am one person.

I have a huge goal to help 1 billion English learners.

I can not do it alone.

I need help.

So the student leaders step up and say, Tiff, we got you.

We're with you.

We're with you on this mission to help 1 billion English learners.

And the way my heart is warmed when I see my student leaders helping other students,

and I'm like, man, you guys care.

They're like, Tiff, we have a mission.

We're trying to help 1 billion English learners.

I needed help.

And I still need their help today.

I can't do it alone.

So if me as your English teacher, if I can't do it alone, I need you to

stop saying that you don't need help.

We're human beings together.

We work better.

Here's the main reason when you say, I don't need help as an English

learner, this phrase can prevent others from offering assistance for you.

Or support other people around you have the desire to see you succeed.

I want you to succeed.

And I haven't even met you in person, but I'm in your corner.

I want you to succeed.

Imagine those around you that know you personally that

have watched you over years.

They want to help you.

They want to be your support.

When you say I'm good, I don't need any help.

I got this.

You limit them from being able to help you instead of saying, I don't need help.

I want you to say, thank you.

I appreciate your offer.

I could use some help with this.

I appreciate your offer.

I appreciate your desire to help me.

I could use some help with this.

Just like your English, Tiffany, I appreciate your help.

And I've seen it in the comments and I do read the comments and I

appreciate each and every one of you.

When you say, Tiff, thank you for this lesson.

You've changed my life.

This lesson has helped me.

I speak English more fluently.

You know what happens when I read those messages?

They make me want to record more lessons.

You are helping me give back to you even more.

Let people help you.

We become better individuals when we allow those around us to support us

and help us on your English journey.

Let people help you.

You got me.

All right, here we go.

Number six, the sixth thing I need you to stop saying, I'm not good at English.

I'm just not good.

My English is not good.

Similar to the first thing I'm bad.

I, I, my English, I'm not good at English.

Stop saying this.

Stop saying that you're not good at English.

The very fact that you're saying it in English.

Isn't that ironic?

I'm not good at English, but you're speaking English.

You're speaking English.

Stop saying I'm not good at English.

Here's the reason when you say I'm not good at English, this phrase in

and of itself limits your own belief in your language learning abilities.

Remember, I keep harping on this point.

I keep emphasizing this point.

I keep saying this over and over again.

I.

Tiffany known to some as teacher, Tiffany, others as Tiff, Tiffany.

I believe in you, but you have to believe in yourself.

Stop saying I'm not good at English.

Instead, here's the alternative.

I want you to say this.

I'm still developing my language skills, but I'm determined to To

improve, man, if I have a student that says that to me, you're talking about

the smile that'll come on my face.

Why?

Because this is a sign of confidence.

Listen, I'm still developing.

I'm in the process.

I'm on my journey and I'm determined.

I have made a decision to improve.

You have to make a decision.

This year is your year.

You have to tell yourself, listen, yes, I'm on this journey,

but I am determined to improve.

Stop saying I'm not good.

Remind yourself that you're on a journey and be patient with yourself.

You ready?

Let's move on.

Here we go.

Number seven, number seven.

Stop saying I'll do it later.

I'm okay.

I'll do it later.

Stop procrastinating.

That's what this is called.

I'll do it later.

Here's the reason why this phrase, I need you to stop saying it.

This phrase can lead to what did I just say?

Procrastination and unfinished tasks.

Listen, I mean, I enjoy these YouTube videos with Tiffany.

One day I'd like to study with her.

I'll do it later.

Now, I'm not telling you, you have to study with me and my Academy.

I'm not saying that there are many other great English teachers and you

might be studying with them right now.

That is totally okay.

What I'm saying though, is, you know, where you are on your English journey.

You know, what you need to do to get to the next level.

You know, my friend, you know, you're smart.

Stop saying I'll do it later.

Maybe it's a book, you know, you need.

Maybe it's a course you need to enroll in.

Maybe it is my Academy you want to enroll in.

Maybe it's a teacher that you want to study with in your native country.

Whatever it is, stop saying I'll do it later.

Instead, I want you to say this, I'll start on it now, or I'll

set a specific time to do it.

Stop saying I'll do it later and either do it now or set a specific time.

For my students in my Academy, in the daily English lessons program, I have

365 daily English lessons in one year, moving them to the advanced English level.

Every day, they follow a specific lesson that I've set up for them.

Why did I set the program up like that?

Because every day they know what they have to do.

Stop saying I'll do it later and do it now.

We're talking about you, my friend, achieving your English goals this year.

I believe in you, but I need you to believe in yourself.

the very first thing you should never say to a stranger is how old are you?

Again, how old are you?

Now, here's the main reason why you should never say this to a stranger.

You see, it is considered impolite, unkind, or rude to

ask a stranger about their age.

Now I want you to pay attention.

Notice that I am emphasizing the.

Asking a stranger, his or her age, you can ask your friend or possibly

an acquaintance, but never ask a stranger their age in English.

This is seemed to be impolite.

Now, as you are on your English journey, you're going to be in many

different situations and sometimes you're going to feel uncomfortable.

Maybe you forget a word, maybe you forget an expression, but I don't want you to

be uncomfortable because you asked the wrong question or said the wrong thing.

So the very first English phrase I need you to remember to never

ask a stranger is how old are you?

You got it.

Excellent.

All right.

The second English phrase you must never say to a stranger is

how How much do you weigh ? Now listen, I'll say it one more time.

How much do you weigh?

Now I'm gonna tell you the reason and then I'm going to go into even more detail.

So this is a personal question that can make people feel.

Uncomfortable.

Now, this lesson is specifically about English phrases and questions.

You should never mention or ask a stranger, but to be very honest, this

one right here, how much do you weigh?

Even if you're close friends, sometimes this is not the best question to ask.

And you might be smiling now, especially if you are a female.

As females, we are a bit more sensitive about our weight.

So we don't talk about our weight as much as say a man would.

And maybe you're a man and for you, you're like, Hey, Tiff, I don't care.

I'll tell you my weight.

But we're talking about English phrases.

You never say to a stranger, and this is a question you never ask a stranger.

Again, if you are speaking to a man, let's say you're at a gym, you're working out.

And a guy walks up guys, they're a little bit different when it comes to the weight

question, different, not in a bad way, but meaning that they're not as sensitive.

But the best practice is for you to never ask a stranger how much he or she weighs.

Be very careful.

You got it.

Excellent.

All right, here we go.

Number three, the third phrase.

I never want you to ask.

Or say is how much money do you make again?

How much money do you make?

Now, the reason why you shouldn't ask a stranger, this question is because.

Discussing finances is generally considered inappropriate.

Now there are many unspoken rules in English, right?

And I'll specifically speak about America, right?

In American culture, there are certain things that you might not find in a book.

Right.

Do this, don't do this, or you might not learn in a specific class.

This is one of them.

You don't speak about finances in such detail with a stranger.

Hey, um, how much money do you make a year?

Immediately, this will kind of turn the stranger off in most situations.

You don't talk about finances in this way with a stranger.

So again, we're talking about things you shouldn't say or.

Or ask when you are speaking with a stranger, my goal is to help

you speak English with confidence.

But speaking English with confidence is not just about the words and expressions

or grammar rules that, you know, it's also about understanding the mindset of the

individuals you will be speaking with.

And that includes knowing what to say and what not to say.

You got me excellent.

So again, the third thing, never ask a stranger how much money they make.

You got it.

Excellent.

All right, here's number four, number four.

Now these are phrases and questions.

Why don't you have kids as I'm teaching you this lesson again, I organized and

prepared this lesson for you, but even as I'm teaching it to you, I'm realizing

once again, how important each and every question, each and every phrase I'm

going to teach you is for you to remember why Not to say this one right here.

Why don't you have kids?

This can be, here's the reason this can be a sensitive topic for some people.

And now I'm going to speak to you as a woman, right?

And I know even guys can experience this as well.

There are many couples, many individuals.

Who want to have children.

Maybe they got married 10 years ago and they've been trying, but failure after

failure, miscarriage, which means you lose a baby miscarriage after miscarriage.

So many women are struggling to have children.

Many couples, husbands, and wives want children, but are

not able to have children.

So if you again, innocently ask them, Hey, why don't you have kids?

How do you think they'll feel?

They might not tell you, Oh, we've been struggling for 10 years to have children,

or we've been struggling for the last year to have children, but we lost a child.

They're not going to go into detail, but you asking that question can be considered

insensitive in American culture.

Now, when I lived overseas, this was not the case, right?

People would ask you all the time.

Hey, why don't you have kids?

They'd ask me, I wasn't married or they'd ask other couples.

But again, being American, that question would always kind of catch me off guard.

Why?

Because in American culture, we are very sensitive.

We understand that people have been through things and it's not saying that

people in your culture are not sensitive.

It's just, we are from different backgrounds, right?

That's the beauty of the world, right?

Globalization.

We learn from each other, right?

We learn how we think differently.

Right?

So I want you to please keep this in mind.

Never ask a stranger.

Why don't you have kids?

I literally have friends who have experienced the loss of a child or

who have experienced years of trying.

So be very careful.

Don't ask this question.

You got me.

Excellent.

All right, here we go.

Number five, number five, you look tired.

I'm laughing at the, I'll say it one more time.

You look tired.

Now I'm laughing because again, I have been exposed to many

different cultures, right?

I have lived amongst many different cultures.

Um, even where I am from, there are many different cultures

living together here in America.

So I've heard this, this statement before, this phrase has been said to me.

I've heard someone say it to another person.

I've heard someone say to a person, they just met a stranger.

Now here's the reason why you should never ever say this to a stranger.

You look tired.

Here's the reason this might imply that they look bad or unwell.

It's like you're telling the person, whoo.

Baby, you don't look good today.

Or, Ooh, man, you had a rough night.

How do you think that person will feel?

Oh no.

All of a sudden they'll become more self conscious.

Oh, do I have bags under my eyes?

Oh no.

Did I not put my makeup on right?

For those that wear makeup.

Oh no.

You don't want an individual to be uncomfortable, right?

We're talking about helping you speak English with confidence, right?

Part of that, again, it's not just the words and expressions and

grammar rules, but it's also about understanding the mindset of the

individuals you will be speaking with.

And if you know, saying you look tired to someone will make them feel uncomfortable

or not feel confident in themselves, that's automatically going to affect

your communication with that person.

Your conversation will experience a glitch, right?

Their facial expression will change.

Maybe they'll get irritated.

Maybe they'll think that you're being rude.

So I never want you to say to a stranger.

You look tired.

You got it.

Excellent.

All right, here we go.

Number six, you've put on weight

again, you've put on weight and I'm going to be very vulnerable

and transparent with you.

So this is very true.

Now I'll tell a reason first, and then I'm going to explain something to you.

Commenting on someone's body is considered rude.

Unless it's a compliment.

If you're like, girl, your hair looks good.

Or you say to a guy, man, your haircut.

Yes, you are looking handsome.

That is totally okay.

But when you comment on someone's appearance in a way that is not

flattering, not a compliment that is considered rude.

So I said, I was going to be very transparent and vulnerable with you.

Remember the statement, the phrase we're saying, you should never say to

a stranger is you've put on weight.

So this is actually something that I'm experiencing now in the last two and

a half years, I have put on weight.

Why?

Because I was taking some medicine.

I'm totally okay, but I was taking some medicine and one of the

side effects of the medicine was.

Gaining weight and the weight came on very quickly.

Now I've said before, I have always been an athlete.

My body type naturally is very athletic, an athletic body type, very muscular.

It was very easy for me to build muscle.

But since I started taking the medicine, I started gaining weight,

even though I was eating the same way.

I might've eaten a little bit more, but it was not normal.

So I gained.

Almost 20 pounds.

Now that's a lot to deal with.

So imagine me again, being vulnerable.

I'm trying to deal with this, right?

This weight gain.

I'm not used to it.

My entire life in high school, I was the most athletic in college.

I was the most athletic.

Now I'm dealing with this, right?

Fast forward 20 something years after college.

And now I'm dealing with this.

And if someone walks up to me.

That I first met, right?

One of my students, hi, teacher Tiffany.

Oh, wow.

You've put on weight since I first saw you on YouTube.

How do you think I would feel now?

Again, I've been around many cultures, so I would kind of roll with the punches.

I have, and I'm okay because I can be transparent.

However, if someone's already sensitive about something or thinking about

something and a stranger brings it up, or even someone they know brings it up.

What do you think will happen?

Exactly.

It will make that person feel a little bit uncomfortable.

Remember, we're talking about phrases.

You should never say to a stranger.

And the effort is to help you again, speak English fluently by

understanding the mindset of the individual you bill be speaking with.

Make sense.

All right, good.

Now, again, I'm totally okay.

I still work out.

I'm not taking the medicine anymore, so I'm fine.

I wanted to use my situation just to help you understand.

You got it.

All right, here we go.

All right, let's go to number seven, number seven,

asking someone this question.

Are you sick again?

Are you sick?

Now here's the reason why this is a question you shouldn't ask a stranger.

This could be seen as rude or intrusive.

Now, let me break this down a little bit more, right?

Because you may be wondering, well, Tiff, if they look sick, I

really actually care about them.

I want to know if they're sick.

Now, if someone is coughing and their nose is running and their eyes are

bloodshot, that's more obvious, right?

But you have to be very, very careful because someone might not be sick.

I will give you this advice.

It's better to let the person tell you what's going on than for you to guess.

Right?

Remember we're talking about things you shouldn't take to a stranger.

Say to a stranger, we're not talking about close friends.

We're not talking about family members or friends of friends, right?

We're talking about strangers.

Makes sense.

All right, good.

So don't ask them, Hey, are you sick?

This kind of goes back to an earlier phrase.

We talked about where you would ask someone like, man, are you tired?

You look tired, same level.

All right.

So let's move on now to number eight, number eight.

You're too skinny again, you're too skinny again, a phrase you

should never say to a stranger.

And I'll say, honestly, don't say that to someone, you know, either.

This honestly is considered body shaming and it's never acceptable.

Remember if you're not complimenting someone on their appearance.

Don't say anything at all.

And I know I have many students from all around the world and in

certain cultures, it's totally okay.

I have some friends who are West Indian and their parents.

It's normal in their culture.

Oh baby, you, you gained weight or old baby.

Woo, you're too skinny.

You got to put some meat on your bones or even some of my Filipino friends.

I understand that in different cultures, it's totally okay to make these comments.

But remember my goal as your English teacher is to help you

speak English confidently and to understand the mindset of the

individuals you'll be speaking with.

I don't want you to be in an uncomfortable position, right?

So again, don't say you're too skinny.

Have you ever heard of, um, anorexia, right?

Anorexia.

That's where an individual many times can become skin and bones and

still feel like they're fat, right?

It's a, it's an illness, right?

And it requires some therapy, right?

To get over and to get through it.

So imagine in your opinion, this individual is skinny.

So when you're meeting up with, right?

But that person is experiencing anorexia.

They might not have gotten to the point where their skin and bones, but

the moment you say, oh, you're too skinny, it could affect them as well.

Well, wait a minute.

I feel fat, but they say I'm skinny and then it could be a spiraling effect.

Well, wait a minute.

So am I not fat?

Am I skinny?

It's better to not say anything except if you want to give a compliment.

You got me.

All right, here we go.

Moving on to number nine, number nine.

I don't care again.

I don't care again.

It's, it's always interesting.

I prepare these lessons, but then when I'm teaching them, I remember

once again, wow, this is so important.

So this is actually taken as a sign of disrespect and lack of interest.

You have to be very careful, right?

I want you to imagine you're in this conversation with someone, right?

And they're like, Hey.

I just got a new job and you're like, I don't care.

Like, Oh, that's, that's nothing to do with me.

I'm I, I don't care.

Or Hey, we're going to get something to eat.

I don't care.

You're not intending to be rude.

You're saying, Hey, no worries.

Don't think about me.

You guys can go ahead.

I don't care implies again, I'm not interested.

And it's actually kind of disrespectful.

So you have to be very careful.

And I'm saying this again to you as an English learner, right?

Because there are many nuances in the English language.

Let's say for example, my friend, this is when it's okay to say, I don't care.

My friend says, Hey, Tiff.

Oh man, I missed your call.

I'm so sorry.

I'm like, Oh, I don't care.

You're all right.

No worries.

Even my facial expression shows warmth though.

Like I don't care.

You're okay.

That is all right.

But if my friend says, I missed your call.

I don't care.

My body language even changed.

This is why I say there are new nuances in the English language.

You have to be careful of.

All right, but just for safety.

Don't say, I don't care instead, explain, Hey, you guys want to go eat?

I'm not hungry right now.

So I'll stay here.

You guys can go ahead instead of saying, I don't care.

Makes sense.

All right, good.

Here we go.

Number 10, number 10.

You don't look like you're from here, man.

You don't look like you're from here.

This right here can make someone feel like an outsider.

Your goal is not to make the person feel uncomfortable.

So if you approach someone or someone approaches you, remember, we're talking

about phrases to never say to a stranger and you've, let's say you've come to

America and you're in, um, let's say Washington DC and you meet someone

and they don't look like what you thought an American would look like.

Don't say, Hey, you don't look like you're from here.

This can be taken as an insensitive comment and you can

make them feel uncomfortable.

Just remember, keep it inside.

Ask them like, Hey, what state are you from?

That's okay.

But remember, this can be seen as inconsiderate.

It can be seen as impolite.

You don't look like you're from here.

Now you'll notice again, as I teach English on this channel

and for those listening to the podcast, my inflections, right?

You'll notice my pronunciation, which you guys said it's very clear, but I

let you know, even if you're listening, you can tell when I'm happy, when

I'm sad, when I'm angry, when I'm upset during a story time, right?

Story time.

Don't miss today's story.

Again, as an English learner, I'm telling you not to say this because you're still

learning the proper inflections, proper body language and facial expressions.

So let's not say this one at all.

All right.

And number 11, number 11, and another important one, you don't

act like a typical, and then you put the nationality or race.

I am an African American woman.

I am a black woman.

So if someone walked up to me and said, man, you don't act like a

typical black woman, this can be a stereotype and it can be offensive,

even when it's not coming from a stranger, please, please don't say this.

I've had this said to me many times when I was in South Korea, right?

Wow.

You don't act like a typical black woman, or you don't act like the

black people I've seen on TV.

The intent, there's no bad intent.

I understand, but this can be not the best thing to say.

It can be considered offensive.

Even if you say you don't act like the typical white person or

typical Spanish person, insert the nationality or race, do not say this.

This is very offensive in certain situations.

All right.

Again, I don't want you to make the person that you're speaking with uncomfortable.

This will affect your fluency because the moment they get uncomfortable,

their body language will change.

Their facial expression will change and you'll start feeling nervous.

That's not what we want.

The very first thing that you must stop saying now is I'll never speak English.

Perfectly.

I'll never be able to speak English like a native speaker.

I'll never be able to speak English well.

Stop saying this now, I'm your English teacher and I believe in you, but

this phrase right here is hurting you.

So I need you to stop saying it.

Here is the reason why it's so detrimental.

This mindset sets an unrealistic expectation of perfection and undermines

the progress and efforts of others.

You've made when you say to yourself, I'm never going to be perfect.

Your mind basically goes into this state.

Well, If we're not going to be perfect, why are we trying everything

we've done so far means nothing.

You have to stop saying this, stop focusing on, Oh, I'm not perfect.

You have to remember all that you've done, all that you've

accomplished and how amazing you are.

So instead of saying this, I want you to say this instead.

Every day, I am improving my English speaking skills.

This makes me happy.

Listen, I really focus on helping English learners like you feel confident

and be more confident in themselves.

So when I teach lessons like this, they make me excited.

I get excited because I know how powerful they are and how much

they will change your experience.

So again, instead of saying, I'll never speak English perfectly.

I want you to start saying every day I am improving my English speaking skills.

You, yes.

And that's the truth.

Every day, you're improving every day.

You're getting better.

This is what I want you to say, moving forward.

Can you do it?

Yes, my friend.

I love it.

All right.

The second thing I need you to stop saying is.

I'm not as good as other learners.

Johnny is really good.

I'm not as good as him, man.

Samantha, her English is awesome, but I'm not as good as her.

Stop saying I'm not as good as other learners.

Why this right here is demotivating.

It takes your motivation away.

It discourages you and it disregards your personal progress and the unique

pace at which individuals learn.

Johnny might learn at this pace.

Samantha might learn at this pace and your pace might be a bit

slower, but you're on the same page.

Journey, and you will achieve your goals.

So don't say I'm not as good as someone else.

I'm not as good as other learners.

Instead, this my friend is what I want you to say.

My journey is unique and I am making progress at my own pace.

Listen, you don't understand all of these movements.

If you're watching the video, these are genuine.

I get excited when I see English learners again, students that are in my program,

in the Speak English with Tiffany Academy, they see me in real time, right?

But even for you, I get excited just realizing that you are going to be

more confident after this lesson.

You've got to believe in yourself.

You have to realize for the audio listeners.

Sorry if that clap was loud, but listen, you have to realize you are amazing.

You are awesome.

You're doing something that is challenging, learning another language.

You've got to believe in yourself.

So instead of saying, I'm not as good as other learners starting right now, I want

you to say this, my journey Is unique and I am making progress at my own pace.

Come on and smile with me.

Yes, you got it.

All right, here we go.

The third thing, my friend, that I need you to stop saying

is, I can't remember new words.

I can't do it.

I can't remember new words.

Don't say this ever again.

Listen very closely.

Don't say this ever again.

I can't do it.

I can't remember new words.

Listen, why is this so bad?

This creates a mental block that can prevent effective memory strategies

from being developed or applied.

You can remember you are intelligent enough.

You are smart enough to remember new words.

Your brain just might use different methods or different strategies

to remember things when you think about the way other people learn.

You have to stop saying, I can't remember new words.

Here's what I want you to say instead, man, I love it.

I am developing new strategies to improve my vocabulary every day.

And I want you to say it with confidence.

I want your shoulders to be back.

I want you to have a look on your face that lets the person know who

you're talking to that, Oh, this is a confident English learner.

Once again, I am developing new strategies to improve my vocabulary.

Every day, you see the difference, you see the difference, right?

It sounds different from, I can't remember new words.

Even those watching my shoulders dropped.

When, when I said, I can't remember new words, the body language even changes.

But the moment you realize, hold up, I can do this and you change the words you use.

I am developing new strategies to improve my vocabulary every day.

Oh yeah, baby.

Here we go.

All right.

Number four, the fourth thing I need you to stop saying now, I'm

too old to learn English again, I'm too old to learn English.

I want you to stay till the end because at the end during story time, I'm going

I'm going to tell you a story about being old and learning another language.

This is a story that happened to me.

Something happened to me.

All right.

So, but I'm too old to learn English.

Stop saying that.

Stop saying that in my program, I have individuals who are in their seventies.

Out here speaking English with confidence.

Why they stopped saying this I'm too old to learn English.

Why is this bad?

It perpetuates the false, the untrue belief that language

learning is age dependent.

It's not learning a language is not based on your age, the process, the

method, the strategies are based on your age, but you have the ability

to learn a new language at any age.

It will just look different.

From someone else, you are never, you are never too old to learn English.

So instead of this, I want you to say learning knows no age, and I am

fully capable of acquiring new skills.

Come on now, one more time, learning knows no age, and I am fully, not

partially, I am fully capable of learning and acquiring new skills.

Thanks.

Listen, you about to leave this lesson amazing.

Here we go.

All right.

Number five, the fifth thing I want you to stop saying, I have a terrible accent.

One more time.

I have a terrible accent.

Stop saying that.

I'm going to tell you why, but I want to add this to the lesson.

I live in America.

I live in the East coast.

Not too far from Washington, DC on the East coast.

We have a certain sound, but when I go to California or when I go to Louisiana,

or when I go to Alabama, or when I go to North Dakota, everyone sounds different.

We have different accents and I know when you watch television or you

watch the news or you watch movies, there seems to be this common accent,

common American accent, but even in America, there are varying accents.

So I need you to stop saying this.

Stop saying I have a terrible accent.

Why this can lead to unnecessary self consciousness and hinder spoken practice.

Let me break this down.

If you're constantly telling yourself, I have a terrible accent.

You'll be less likely to speak.

Oh, I, Oh, I can't say that.

Why?

Because my accent's not that good and they're not going to understand me.

And all of a sudden, this self talk.

Okay.

The words you say to yourself in your mind starts getting louder.

Ooh, don't say anything.

They're not going to understand you.

Your, your accent's not good.

Stop saying that your accent is terrible.

Instead.

I want you to say this, my accent is unique and it will improve with practice.

Again, my accent is unique and it will improve with practice.

It's okay to have a desire to sound like a certain American.

Many students tell me, Tiff, I want to speak like you.

Hey, by all means, come on, mimic me, copy me, start sounding like me.

That's totally okay.

But as you're on the journey to sounding like me, As you're going through the

process, don't discourage yourself.

Don't tell yourself you're terrible, terrible.

Instead say, my accent is unique and it will improve with practice.

I'll start sounding like Tiff eventually.

My accent right now though is unique.

You gotta remind yourself that you're on a journey and encourage yourself.

Don't put yourself down.

Here we go.

Number six, the sixth thing I need you to stop saying that was like

a tongue twister, sixth thing.

TH tongue through your teeth guys.

Here we go.

I'll never understand native speakers.

Stop saying this.

I'll never understand native speakers.

Newsflash, I'm a native speaker and you understand me.

It's funny.

Sometimes in the comment section, and I guess it's a compliment in

the comment section, I'll have some people say, wow, where are you from?

Your English is amazing.

And I always smile.

I'm like, Thanks.

I'm American.

It's cute because sometimes students assume that I'm not American,

that maybe I learned English and I'm just teaching it to you all.

So I appreciate the compliment, but yes, I am actually American.

English is my first language.

I speak Korean, but English is my first language.

So this is the thing I'll never understand.

Native speakers doesn't apply to you.

Why?

I'm a native speaker and you understand me now.

Don't say, ah, Tiff, but it's different.

You speak clearly.

I can understand you.

No, we're trying to help you stop saying these negative things to yourself.

Stop saying I'll never understand native speakers.

Tiffany, I am a native speaker and you understand me.

Here's why this is so detrimental.

It assumes a permanent state of confusion and impedes or inhibits or stops.

You're listening practice when you say I'll never understand native speakers.

Your brain says, all right, well, we don't have to put any more effort in here.

She's not going to understand them.

So why are we working hard to help them understand?

It's not a permanent state instead.

This is what I want you to say.

I will gradually understand more as I continue practicing listening out.

Hey, I'm going to continue to improve right now.

I might only understand 50%, but tomorrow I'll understand 51 and

next week I'll understand 57%.

Again, I will gradually understand more as I continue practicing listening.

You got it?

Yes, my friend.

Let's keep going.

All right, here we go.

Number seven.

The seventh thing I want you to stop saying to yourself, I'm

afraid to speak and make mistakes.

I'm afraid to speak and make mistakes.

Now, listen, if this is your first video, welcome again, I'm teacher Tiffany.

Hey, but if you've been here for a while, you've seen many of my videos

and there are points in videos where I might've said a word and said it too fast.

Just again, earlier, I said, Ooh, that was a tongue twister.

The TH sound.

I leave those things in my videos for you.

On purpose, why I'm a native English speaker.

I'm an English teacher.

And even being an American, there are moments when a word

might not come out properly.

There are moments when the pronunciation might be a bit tricky.

It happens to everyone, not just Americans, even in your own language.

There are moments when you have to pause like, wait a minute.

How do I say that again?

Or wait a minute.

That didn't come out right.

We're human beings.

So I purposely leave those moments in first to show you I'm a human being and

I enjoy what I do, and I'm just in the moment, enjoying teaching you English.

Right.

I want you to enjoy the lesson as well, but also to remind

you it's okay to make mistakes.

So here's the reason when you say I'm afraid to speak and make mistakes, it

prevents the valuable learning experience that comes from making mistakes.

Listen, mistakes will help you.

They're not gonna hurt you.

They show you what you need to work on.

So instead of saying, I'm afraid to speak and make mistakes, this is what I

want you to say, here's the alternative.

Speaking and making mistakes is a crucial or important part of my learning process.

Fact once again, speaking and making mistakes is a crucial

part of my learning process.

The end start saying this and realizing mistakes are a part of the process.

Number eight, the eighth thing I need you to stop saying.

I can't pronounce words correctly.

I can't pronounce words correctly.

Stop saying this.

I can't pronounce words correctly.

Listen, when you say I can't pronounce words correctly, it may cause avoidance.

It may cause avoidance in speaking out the fear and making errors.

It may cause avoidance and speaking out of fear of errors.

It may cause avoidance in speaking out the fear of errors.

You'll avoid speaking because you don't want to make any errors.

Instead of saying this, this is what I want you to say with practice.

My pronunciation will get better again with practice.

My pronunciation will get better.

Here's the fact you are going to improve each and every day.

So don't stop.

Number.

Nine, I can't express myself the way I want to in English.

I can't express myself the way I want to in English.

Stop saying this.

Why?

Here's the reason when you do this, when you say this over and over, it may

discourage you from practicing speaking and expressing yourself in different ways.

I, I can't express myself the way I want to saying that over and

over again will stop you from even expressing yourself in general.

So instead I want you to say this, you know, I'm learning new ways to

express myself in English every day.

Once again, you know, I'm learning new ways to express myself in English.

Every day, focus on saying this, instead of saying that you can't express

yourself the way you want to in English.

Make sense.

You got it.

Listen, I want you to speak English fluently.

I hope this lesson helped you and I can't wait to talk to you in the next one.

Talk to you then.