Build Confidence in English - How to Build Confidence with English

so have you ever felt nervous while  speaking english maybe you feel a little shy  

or nervous and when you try to speak you  forget the words i know this happens to me  

sometimes when i try to speak a second  language so has that ever happened to you  

have you ever struggled with confidence  when using english so have you ever felt  

not very confident when using english or have  you ever wished you could feel more comfortable  

using english so actually these are all things  that some of our followers on facebook and youtube  

have commented so uh you guys i hope  today i can help you feel a little bit  

better about using english so let's learn how to  be more confident with english okay you guys ready  

so we're gonna talk about three things today  having a plan something called fake it till you  

make it we'll talk about that and something called  self-compassion so don't worry we will talk about  

all of these words and what they mean so here is a  three-step plan to be more confident using english  

step number one have a plan so do  you have a study plan right now

what is a plan you need to choose what and  when you will study so do you have that  

do you have uh do you know exactly  what you study and exactly when  

you study it do you have a plan or is it  just random and whenever you feel like it  

so you need to choose what and when you will study  so this means you need methods which are what and  

a schedule which is when so let's talk about  these things so step one of having a plan is  

you need methods or ways to study so a method  is what you do right this is the thing that you  

do to study it is very important  this is something i talk about a lot  

your methods should be enjoyable so this means  you should like the methods you choose so if you  

like to study english maybe you love to study  vocabulary well that's a method you like maybe you  

like to use flashcards when you study well then  do that because you like it you enjoy it if you  

don't like to do that that's okay you don't have  to study that way you can study any way that you  

enjoy but extremely very very very important  that your methods are enjoyable so how how  

can we do this maybe you're thinking oh what  does that mean how can i like studying well  

an easy thing is to think of what you  already like and add english to it  

so for example maybe you love watching youtube  well then watch youtube videos about topics you  

like in english maybe you love to watch videos  about food i do i like cooking videos so how can i  

make this about language study well i can watch  youtube videos about cooking in the language i'm  

trying to learn so if i want to learn english well  i can watch cooking videos in english or maybe  

you like sports okay watch some sports in english  you can do this on youtube you can do this in  

many places online so watch things if you like  youtube watch youtube videos about topics you like  

in english maybe you love listening to music well  then a great enjoyable method for you to study  

would be to learn about and explore english music  and use that to study study the music and read  

the lyrics or the words to the song and study the  words music and lyrics which are again the words  

in a song are a great way to study so if you love  music that could be an enjoyable method for you or  

maybe like so many people you love playing video  games well play your game let's if it's an online  

game or a game you can play with other people  then play on an american or british or australian  

server and chat with the players in english this  is a really nice way because you don't have to  

show your face right you can just type in practice  and you can learn a lot of english slang and  

see how conversations work with many people so  make sure to have methods this is very important  

but what's also important is having a schedule  a schedule is when right it is impossible  

or not possible you can't do it you can't learn  a skill like language without committing regular  

time to it so this means maybe every day  or once a week or whatever works for you  

make sure your schedule is doable which means  can do it and enjoyable which means can enjoy  

so make sure you can do your schedule and you  can enjoy did you notice here again enjoyable  

the best way to learn is to find a way that you  enjoy learning whether it's learning how to ski  

ride a bike or speak english it is best to and  and uh will help you if you enjoy it so also  

make sure your schedule is specific so this  means don't just say i'll study once a week  

okay well we're getting started on a specific  schedule but for example instead of saying once  

a week say and commit or always do it i will  study every tuesday morning for 10 minutes  

or i will study three days a week for 15  minutes on my way to school or on my way to work  

so maybe i choose monday wednesday friday right  on my way to work i will study however i want to  

maybe that means listening to an english podcast

but that you have methods and a schedule this  is the best way to learn okay so step one for  

being more confident have a plan when you are  doing something and sticking to your schedule  

and being regular always studying in a way  you enjoy at the same times it will help you  

feel more confident right unless what should  i do right so have a plan have a schedule  

okay step number two is called fake it till you  make it so this is an english idiom we talk about  

idioms a lot on our channel this is  an english idiom that means to pretend  

you're good at something until you are so to fake  it means to pretend right and then make it means  

you can do it so fake it till you make it  we use this idiom pretty often in english  

especially when maybe i am starting a new job  for example and i don't feel very confident  

well i will just pretend to be confident until  i am and we can do that with english as well  

pretend you are confident using english and  eventually maybe maybe even in a few minutes  

if you are pretending to be confident or maybe  it takes some time you will really feel more  

confident and comfortable so does this sound  crazy maybe it does but i promise it really works  

so what does it mean to pretend you're confident  how do we pretend to be confident using english  

well what do con confident people look and what do  confident people sound like well confident people  

have good posture good volume and humor right can  we can laugh at ourselves if we feel confident so  

let's talk about each of these first good posture  so confident someone who has who is confident has  

good posture part of this means sitting up  straight like i'm doing so if you are using  

english make sure to stand or sit up straight it  helps you really does help you feel more confident  

make sure you don't start shrinking right and  doing this we do this when we feel nervous  

right so make sure to sit up straight and it  really does help you feel a little more confident  

another part of good posture is don't do something  called fidgeting so for example let's say i am  

looking for oh let's say i'm holding a pencil  and i'm using english and maybe i feel a little  

nervous so this is fidgeting right or maybe  i'm doing something like this don't fidget  

make sure to be aware of the things you do when  you feel nervous and to help yourself feel more  

confident make sure to don't do those things  right so sit up straight and don't fidget i notice  

when i'm nervous if i i'm wearing a ring i  play with my ring so i have to not do that  

because it helps me feel more confident and  also other people see me as more confident  

another part of posture or just our body language  is keeping eye contact if this is difficult for  

you or maybe in your culture it's not uh as normal  to always keep eye contact when someone is talking  

that's okay just make sure that you're not looking  away because you're feeling nervous or shy okay  

so step one fake it till you make it good  posture next is good volume so this means  

speak at a normal conversational volume one  thing that we do when we feel like we don't know  

exactly how to say something in english is maybe  we start mumbling right we talk a little quieter  

because we don't we're not really sure is this  how i say it oh i i don't know so maybe you start  

speaking quiet quietly so make sure to speak at a  normal conversational volume and again maybe you  

have to force yourself to do it maybe you  feel uncomfortable speaking loudly or you  

feel uncomfortable sitting up straight  not fidgeting and keeping eye contact  

but it's okay you will feel a little uncomfortable  at first but soon it will feel normal and you will  

feel more confident and last and this is very  important is humor so humor is we often say  

someone has a good humor this means that they can  they laugh a lot or make other people laugh right  

if you have good humor so part of fake it till  you make it is humor don't be too serious laugh  

at your mistakes every person alive makes mistakes  i make mistakes you make mistakes that person over  

there makes mistakes they make mistakes everyone  makes mistakes right so it's okay if you are  

trying to sit up straight and speak clearly  and loudly and you make a mistake just laugh  

and continue it's okay to make mistakes don't uh  be too serious or too hard on yourself because  

this is just part of learning right we always  make mistakes and another thing that you can do  

if you really feel like you're making  big mistakes and you are talking to a  

native speaker just joke about your language  level oh i have so much to learn with english  

you'll be surprised at the feedback that you  get and what do i mean by this most people  

appreciate that you are trying to speak to them  in english or in their native language right  

so it's okay you don't have to be perfect  so just try to have some humor about it  

it's very important to be able to laugh at  yourself you guys see me laugh at myself  

on the live streams when i make mistakes  haha whoops and continue right so like this  

so remember good posture good volume  and humor okay our last step today  

for being more is something called self compassion  okay so what does this term mean well self is you  

or for me myself is me yourself is you and  then let's talk about the word compassion  

compassion is the feeling you get when you see  another person suffering and you want to stop  

that suffering so what is suffering this is when  someone is hurt or hurting right so maybe you  

see a child fall and cut their knee and you feel  oh i want to help i want to help that person oh  

poor oh you poor thing i want to help you that is  compassion so when we feel we see another person  

hurt we and we want to help them and help them to  stop being hurt right so how do we have compassion  

for others what do we do what is compassion  compassion could be uh your friend had a bad day  

and you just tried to make them feel better oh  don't worry about it you are so smart you're so  

great you can do it tomorrow will be better right  don't worry so we might talk to people to try to  

make them feel better right give compliments this  is compassion uh we might do something to help  

them maybe i see that my my my mom my parents are  so busy so i oh i have compassion right i feel oh  

it's so difficult for you so i might do something  like cook them dinner this is compassion so  

a good way to think about compassion with  language is ask yourself this question  

what would you tell your best friend if they  were feeling bad about their language ability  

maybe my best friend is trying to learn  english too and um she tells me oh i made  

so many mistakes today and i just feel so  bad well what would i say to my best friend  

what would you say to your best friend  well i think most of us would say hey  

don't worry you're doing a good job learning a  language is hard you're doing great maybe try  

to do this next time right so what would you tell  your best friend if they are having that struggle  

now tell that to yourself so if i tell  my friend if i would tell my friend  

hey you're doing a good job learning a language is  hard try this next time well now i'm just going to  

tell that to myself when i feel that way hey i'm  doing a good job it's hard to learn a language  

and i'm going to try this other thing next time  and then maybe not feel so bad about it right  

compassion also means patience and  forgiveness so patience means okay to wait  

so it takes a lot of time to learn how to speak a  language especially something like english which  

is a difficult language it has so many influences  from other languages and it's an old language and  

it has so many crazy rules and things that it's  supposed to be a rule but it doesn't work so  

be patient with yourself it takes time and it's  okay that it takes time and forgiveness means to  

not stay angry or unhappy about another person's  actions so it's important to forgive yourself if  

you make mistakes don't don't feel angry or upset  or bad because you're making language mistakes  

just forgive yourself oh it's okay right have  patience it takes time and forgiveness it's okay  

that i make mistakes right just keep trying if  you can't do that it will be very hard to learn  

because if you're always saying no i should have  been perfect i did this wrong i did that wrong  

no no make sure to have self-compassion  patience forgiveness and be kind to yourself too

so with practicing self-compassion uh  remember often when you're afraid of  

what others will think of you you're  putting your worries into their mind  

so if you are afraid that you of speaking to  a native english speaker because you'll make  

mistakes and you're worried that they will think  a bad thing about you usually that means you  

feel bad about you so you think the other person  is will as well but that's often not the case  

this is most often not the case so most people  are understanding and forgiving and appreciate  

you trying and know that it's hard to learn  another language so uh don't put your worry  

into someone else's mind okay so remember  most people will be understanding and will not  

uh think bad things about you okay so remember  our three steps to having confidence with english  

step one have a plan have enjoyable methods  and an enjoyable schedule so you can practice  

regularly in a way that you enjoy even  just sticking to a study schedule can  

help you feel more confident because you're  doing something and learning a little bit

step two fake it till you make it pretend to  be confident until you are have good posture  

good volume and humor make  sure you can laugh at yourself  

and step three have self-compassion so don't be  angry at yourself when you make mistakes be kind  

be patient and be forgiving and remember most  other people are kind patient and forgiving too