Saying Sorry In English - Level Up Your English Conversation

Hi I'm Oli. Welcome to Oxford Online English. I’ve got a question: have you ever forgotten  

your best friend’s birthday, or  been late for an important meeting? 

Have you ever spilt coffee on a friend’s shirt? 

What connects all these situations? 

They’re all situations where you might need to  apologise. If so, what would you say? Of course,  

to apologise, you can just say ‘I’m  sorry’, but there’s much more language  

that native-level English speakers use  to apologise and express how they feel. 

You'll learn a wide range of language to apologise in this lesson.

This video is part of a series called 'Level Up'

where you can expand your English conversation skills in everyday situations.

Don't forget to check our other videos in our 'Level Up' series, too.

Another thing: Don't forget to turn on subtitles if you need them.

This video has English subtitles. Click the 'CC' button on the video player to turn them on.

Are you ready for your class? Let's begin!

I’m really annoyed! I came here specifically  

to buy an oven dish that I saw online, but  then I was told you don’t sell them any more. 

Yes, the supplier went out  of business, unfortunately. 

I drove all the way from Linden to buy one!  Why is it on your website if you don’t have it? 

I apologise for the inconvenience. It  happened very suddenly and we haven’t  

had time to update our website yet. Well, I’m not happy with this. 

I *do* apologise. I know it must be  disappointing. Is there something else  

I can help you with instead? No thank you.

Saying ‘I apologise’ is a formal way of saying  sorry. You’ll most often hear it in a business  

environment, at an office or to someone in  authority – like a boss, or a judge or a  

police officer, someone like that. You may encounter different forms  of ‘I apologise’ – such as ‘I *do* apologise’,  

or ‘Please accept my apologies’ or ‘my  *sincerest* apologies’. Words like ‘do’  

and ‘sincerest’ add emphasis, showing the other  person that you feel bad about what happened.

These different forms of ‘I apologise’ are  often found in formal writing. Have you  

ever received a letter of apology  from a business for bad service?  

In English, those letters would often  start with something like: ‘We apologise …’

How else could you apologise in formal writing? The letter from the college came! 

That’s so exciting! What does it say? Dunno, haven’t opened it yet. 

Well, what are you waiting for? Here goes... 

Go on! What does it say? Dear Miss Phillips, we regret to inform you… 

Oh, no... I’m so sorry. “We regret to inform you that your  

application to was unsuccessful.” I’m so sorry you didn’t get  

in. I know how much you wanted it. Well, we’re here now, so we might as well get an  

What? Why? There’s a sign: “We regret to  

inform you that due to unforeseen circumstances  we will be closed until further notice.”

Communication from companies often use  the phrase ‘we regret to inform you that…’

‘We regret to inform you that you  were not selected for the interview’.

‘We regret to inform you that your insurance  policy does not cover such situations.’

But what about everyday conversations?  Perhaps you want to apologise to a friend  

or a sibling or a neighbour?

Oooh! Ouch! look what you’ve done,  you’ve spilt hot coffee all over me! 

Oh! I am so sorry! This shirt is ruined! 

Here, let me help…

I’m really sorry! That was so  clumsy of me! Please let me pay  

for the shirt. It’s the least I can do. Sometimes I don’t know where your head is. 

I know, I really should pay more  attention to my surroundings.

The simplest way of apologising is to say,  

‘I'm sorry’. It’s neutral language  which fits almost any situation.

However, if the incident is more serious,  

you could add a word like  ‘very’ or ‘really’ for emphasis.

You can also make an apology sound  stronger by emphasising the auxiliary verb.  

For example, ‘I *am* sorry’ sounds  stronger than just ‘I’m sorry’.

I’m sorry, but I just don’t think your  son is ready to play on the team yet! 

I don’t understand why you say that. He’s  been working so hard and he’s improved a lot. 

He has, I can see that, but he’s  still the weakest pitcher on the team. 

You should give him a chance. He may not be  great at the game but he’s very enthusiastic. 

I’m sorry but that doesn’t make any sense at all.  

We have a championship coming up. Well, I’m sorry you see it that way…

You can see that ‘I’m sorry’ can be used in many  different useful ways depending on the context.  

You can say 'Sorry' or 'I'm sorry' even in  situations where you haven’t done anything wrong!

You can use it to disagree politely. For example:  ‘I’m sorry, but what you’re saying isn’t logical’.

You can use it to introduce something you  think the other person won’t want to hear;  

for example: ‘I'm sorry, but I don’t think  James will qualify for the race this season’.

You can use it to express disappointment: ‘I’m  sorry you won’t be joining us this evening!’

You can even say 'I'm sorry' to express  sympathy when you hear sad news: ‘I’m sorry  

you haven’t been feeling well’. Oh no! Are you okay? 

I’m okay… but, my car! It’s a complete  write-off! What am I going to do! 

I am really sorry. It’s my  fault. I wasn’t paying attention. 

How will I get to work? Oh, what a mess! I’m really very sorry. I’ll sort it out.  

Please give me your insurance details. I’ll  have the car towed. Can I call you a taxi?

You heard before that you can  use words like ‘really’ or ‘very’  

together with ‘sorry’ to make your apology  stronger. However, as you heard here,  

you can also use both words together for  extra emphasis: ‘I’m really very sorry.’

If you not only want to apologise, but  also take responsibility for something,  

you can say ‘It’s my fault.’ Hi, excuse me, hello, I think you’re in my seat. 

No, I don’t think so. This  is 23A. And it says so on my ticket. 

May I have a look? Um, no... your  ticket says 28A. That’s over there. 

I beg your pardon? I said: your ticket says twenty eight A. 

Oh, excuse me... my eyes and  ears aren’t what they use to be. 

It’s quite alright. Do you  need help moving your things?

‘Excuse me’ is mostly used  to get someone’s attention,  

as in ‘Excuse me, but can I ask you a question?’

However, you might also use it as  an apology in certain situations.  

It’s quite old-fashioned and  formal when used in this way.

‘Excuse me’ can also mean ‘I’m sorry,  but I didn’t hear what you said’.

You heard another formal phrase in the  dialogue just now. Do you remember it?

You heard: ‘I beg your pardon’. This is a  formal way of apologising. It’s rarely used  

in modern conversational English, but you might  hear it. Sometimes people use it ironically.

Hello, Derek, thanks so much for coming to see me. 

Hello, Mrs Sanders. As you may have guessed,  

this is about the whole petty cash incident. Go on... 

Well, it seems we owe you an apology;  the thief was caught this morning. 

That’s good to hear. I told  you I didn’t take the money. 

Yes, you did, and I owe you a  sincere apology for accusing you. 

Well, I appreciate the apology, but  I was really hurt by the accusation. 

I know, I know. And for that, I  apologise and hope we can move past it.

You can use ‘I owe you an apology’ when you  realize that you’ve done something wrong  

and you want to put it right. You can also say it  to other people if *they've* done something wrong.  

For example, if your child  snatches a toy from another child  

you could say: ‘Kelly, I think you  owe Neil an apology, don’t you?’

You can also use this phrase to  demand an apology from someone else,  

by saying ‘I think you owe me an apology.’

We’ve now heard some words and phrases  you can use to say you are sorry.  

But sometimes, people apologise without  actually using any of these words.

Why isn’t the environmental report on my desk yet? The internet was down again.  

I couldn’t do the research. 

I’m so tired of this service provider. I  couldn’t even do my presentation yesterday. 

This has been going on for weeks now.  We’re all falling behind on our work. 

Oh well, what can you do? We’re all  so reliant on technology these days.

Apologies are sometimes given in an indirect  way, without using words such as ‘I am sorry’,  

‘or ‘please accept my apology’. Instead,  people sometimes offer an explanation instead.

For example, in a city where public  transportation is unreliable, coming  

late to a meeting and giving an explanation like,  ‘The bus was late,’ might be perfectly acceptable.  

In a city known for its heavy snowfall,  an explanation like ‘The snow was so heavy  

this morning I couldn’t get my car out of  the driveway’ may be all you need to say.

Now, let’s see if you can take the language you’ve  learned today and apply it to a real situation.

I can’t believe you missed the meeting!

Could you respond? What did you say?

There are many possibilities. But  some are more appropriate than others.  

Maybe you were tempted to say ‘I’m sorry!’ – but  is that really the best choice in this situation?

Let’s see how this may play out in the real world.

Molly: I can’t believe you missed the meeting! The bus was late and the traffic on  

Stevens Street was awful! That’s hardly an excuse. You  

should’ve made another plan. You know how  important this meeting is for the company. 

I know. I apologise. I should’ve left home sooner. You really let me down. I thought I  

could rely on you. You can! I sincerely  

apologise. It won’t happen again. Maybe I  can phone Mr Beach to try and reschedule?

By saying ‘I apologise’ and adding the word  ‘sincerely’, you have a better chance of  

communicating just how much you regret missing  the meeting. You could say ‘it won’t happen  

again’ to show your commitment to not making  the same mistake again. Adding an offer to  

try and fix the situation may just show how much  you care, and smooth things over with the boss.

So, you’ve seen many different ways to apologise.  Why not put your new skills to the test right now?

Pause the video and try to complete the phrases.

Could you do it? Need more time? You can take  more time! Try to get as many answers as you can.

Let’s see the answers now.

How did you do? Did you get them all?  Being able to apologise effectively is  

a skill that will be useful throughout your life.

I hope you enjoyed today’s  lesson. Thanks for watching!

See you soon!