English Topics - English Conversation Strategies

468,107 views ・ 2015-07-24

Learn English with EnglishClass101.com


Please double-click on the English subtitles below to play the video.

00:00
Alisha: Hi, everybody!
0
640
900
00:01
My name is Alisha and I'm joined again in the studio by…
1
1540
2460
00:04
Michael: Michael. Hello.
2
4000
1440
00:05
Alisha: And, today we're going to be talking about English conversation strategies.
3
5440
4500
00:09
Let's get right into it.
4
9940
1090
00:11
Let's start with Michael.
5
11030
1000
00:12
What is your first strategy for keeping an English conversation going?
6
12030
4070
00:16
Michael: This is very important.
7
16100
2170
00:18
“Don't say, ‘I'm fine, thank you.
8
18270
3720
00:21
And you?’”
9
21990
1000
00:22
You hear this all the time from second language English learners or non-native speakers.
10
22990
4410
00:27
It's one of the first things you learn in an English class.
11
27400
3830
00:31
It's easy, it's good, it's a basic foundation.
12
31230
2030
00:33
Okay, that's fine.
13
33260
1000
00:34
But, as soon as you can switch it up.
14
34260
2680
00:36
Because, to me, when I meet a foreigner and they come up, and if they say, “Hey, how
15
36940
3540
00:40
are you?”
16
40480
1000
00:41
Say, “Oh, I'm fine.
17
41480
1390
00:42
I'm good.
18
42870
1000
00:43
How about you?”
19
43870
1000
00:44
And they say, “I'm fine, thank you.
20
44870
1000
00:45
And you?”
21
45870
1000
00:46
And it's almost robotic because I've said it so many times, and when I hear that, I
22
46870
3100
00:49
think their English isn't that good.
23
49970
2370
00:52
And, inside, I'm just going to be really polite and say, “Hello,” and talk slowly and
24
52340
4820
00:57
try to get out of there as quick as I can.
25
57160
2150
00:59
To really impress the foreigner, in my opinion, I think the best way to do it is say something--
26
59310
5210
01:04
Use a big word or just like a slang word.
27
64520
2220
01:06
Something like that.
28
66740
1000
01:07
When I hear that, I go, “Wow, man!
29
67740
1470
01:09
I want to know what this person thinks!
30
69210
1640
01:10
I want to get their point of view!
31
70850
1240
01:12
And I'm really excited,” and then I've had great conversations because of that.
32
72090
3880
01:15
Alisha: That's a really good one, and actually, I think on this YouTube channel, from a couple
33
75970
5350
01:21
years ago, there's a video all about better answers to the question “How are you?”
34
81320
6619
01:27
than “I'm fine, thank you.
35
87939
1901
01:29
And you?” or if someone says, “Hey, how are you?
36
89840
3640
01:33
I'm good!
37
93480
1000
01:34
You?” or “Fine.
38
94480
1000
01:35
You?”
39
95480
1000
01:36
Never “I'm fine, thank you.
40
96480
1000
01:37
And you?”
41
97480
1000
01:38
Never.
42
98480
1000
01:39
But try to actually use a phrase that a native speaker would use, and then that's a clue
43
99480
1920
01:41
to the native speaker that, “Oh, maybe this person is ready for a conversation beyond
44
101400
4190
01:45
basic English.”
45
105590
1000
01:46
That's a really good point.
46
106590
1360
01:47
I like that.
47
107950
1000
01:48
I didn't think of things not to do.
48
108950
1120
01:50
I only thought of things to do.
49
110070
2970
01:53
Cool! Let's see.
50
113040
2119
01:55
Let's go to my first one.
51
115159
2291
01:57
This strategy, in general, is just “ask the other person a question.”
52
117450
7779
02:05
I'm guilty of this too when I'm learning another language.
53
125229
2381
02:07
I tend to only get input.
54
127610
2570
02:10
Somebody else is always asking me the questions, and then I forget myself to ask the other
55
130180
5170
02:15
person a question.
56
135350
1460
02:16
One question that I like to ask or a variation, any kind of “WH” question is good, like
57
136810
5701
02:22
a “who” question, “what,” “where.”
58
142511
2279
02:24
Something like this, if you've been paying attention, you can use anyway to transition
59
144790
3080
02:27
in your conversation.
60
147870
1000
02:28
This was in a previous video.
61
148870
1750
02:30
You can ask something like anyway up to anything fun this weekend.
62
150620
2619
02:33
This is a pretty casual, conversational question that you can ask just about anybody, whether
63
153239
5232
02:38
you've just met them or whether you've known them for a while, but just get in the habit
64
158471
4899
02:43
of asking other people the question.
65
163370
2300
02:45
Don't wait for someone else to ask you the question.
66
165670
2100
02:47
So, that's one strategy that I tried to use to keep things going.
67
167770
4230
02:52
Michael: Yeah, me too.
68
172000
1120
02:53
I agree, and I'm going to say, “samesies,” because actually, two of my questions were
69
173120
4440
02:57
exactly what you said.
70
177560
1459
02:59
Agree 100%.
71
179019
1000
03:00
This is kind of cheating.
72
180019
1121
03:01
These should be one.
73
181140
1000
03:02
So, “always ask questions.”
74
182140
2679
03:04
Again, you forget it's really easy.
75
184819
1811
03:06
I'm really guilty of this, English, non-English, whatever.
76
186630
3889
03:10
I'm guilty of this.
77
190519
1161
03:11
And, the other thing is ask deep, open-ended questions.
78
191680
3180
03:14
If you ask a yes-or-no question, just like what Alisha was saying, it just dead ends.
79
194860
5269
03:20
You can't just say, “Do you like cheese?”
80
200129
2841
03:22
“Yes,” or “No.”
81
202970
1000
03:23
You would want to say, “What do you think about cheese?
82
203970
2650
03:26
What is your favorite kind?”
83
206620
1070
03:27
And kind of open it up to something else and let it just kind of snowball.
84
207690
3840
03:31
Alisha: Right.
85
211530
1349
03:32
Yeah, I think that's really a key.
86
212879
2571
03:35
I have another variation.
87
215450
1170
03:36
I guess I'll just continue on because it kind of relates to what you're talking about.
88
216620
3360
03:39
He's saying always ask questions, always ask deep open-ended questions.
89
219980
5350
03:45
Don't ask a yes-or-no question because yes or no ends with the “Yes” or the “No.”
90
225330
4070
03:49
One of the things that I'll do is use a pattern similar to this, “Hey, did you see...?”
91
229400
3490
03:52
or “Hey, did you hear about blah, blah, blah?”
92
232890
2269
03:55
So, you can use this little “blah, blah, blah” as your--you can ask about the news.
93
235159
5640
04:00
You can ask about something funny you saw on the Internet.
94
240799
2330
04:03
You can ask about something that you heard from another friend of yours, whatever.
95
243129
5161
04:08
It's just a way to check in with the other person and say, “Oh, did you also experience
96
248290
4720
04:13
this thing that I experienced?
97
253010
1150
04:14
Let's talk about that.”
98
254160
1189
04:15
That might be another question that you can use with people.
99
255349
2420
04:17
Michael: I like that one.
100
257769
1000
04:18
I really like that one because you got to stay within people's comfort zone.
101
258769
3941
04:22
Maybe you asked, and maybe they don't want to, right?
102
262710
2209
04:24
A good thing is, “Did you hear about it?”
103
264919
1481
04:26
That's up to him.
104
266400
1000
04:27
Maybe they don't want to talk about it.
105
267400
1000
04:28
They can say, “Oh, yeah.
106
268400
1000
04:29
I heard about that,” and you can kind of feel the atmosphere and realize, “Maybe
107
269400
5190
04:34
I shouldn't talk about this.”
108
274590
1000
04:35
Change the subject, or they get passionate and they start talking about it, and there
109
275590
3250
04:38
you go and just let it go.
110
278840
1900
04:40
Yeah, absolutely.
111
280740
1960
04:42
One thing, again, I'm guilty of is you got to keep returning it.
112
282700
4490
04:47
Don't just say, “Oh, yeah, and what I think about that...”
113
287190
1940
04:49
Bring it back.
114
289130
1120
04:50
Ask them, “What about you?”
115
290250
1910
04:52
That's a common thing I forget about.
116
292160
2460
04:54
Alisha: Ok. Good.
117
294620
2040
04:56
I have one more.
118
296660
1640
04:58
This one, use when you see fit, I guess.
119
298300
5690
05:03
I'll just introduce it.
120
303990
3470
05:07
Compliment the other person.
121
307460
1000
05:08
This can be a nice strategy just to show that you're enjoying the other person's company.
122
308460
5110
05:13
It can be as simple as, “Oh, I like your shirt today,” or “Oh, that's a nice dress
123
313570
3030
05:16
you're wearing today,” or “Oh, did you get a new haircut?
124
316600
2080
05:18
That looks good on you!”
125
318680
1079
05:19
Something like that.
126
319759
1000
05:20
This is a nice way to make the other person maybe want to spend more time with you, I
127
320759
4271
05:25
think.
128
325030
1000
05:26
Michael: I agree 100% Two things: One, I think it's a good conversation starter sometimes.
129
326030
5400
05:31
If, you got to be careful.
130
331430
1820
05:33
With a stranger, it can be creepy.
131
333250
1150
05:34
It can be a little uncomfortable, what you're complimenting, right?
132
334400
3570
05:37
But if it's something like, if they have a t-shirt and it's a band that you both like,
133
337970
3280
05:41
that's a great conversation starter, and you feel, “Wow, we're connected.”
134
341250
4310
05:45
Number two, the second thing I was thinking about is that keep it honest.
135
345560
4570
05:50
I love a sincere compliment.
136
350130
1750
05:51
It really means a lot more, and it really does butter them up, kind of get them open
137
351880
4689
05:56
to having more conversations deeper, that kind of thing.
138
356569
3320
05:59
But one of the things people do, which I don't like is, let's say they say, “Hey, nice
139
359889
4411
06:04
shirt!”
140
364300
1000
06:05
And then the person, out of habit, will say, “Oh, you too.
141
365300
2130
06:07
I like your shirt, too.”
142
367430
1150
06:08
Just my opinion, I don't think this feels really natural.
143
368580
3540
06:12
It doesn't really feel sincere, so I would save it, make a mental note, and go, “Hmm,
144
372120
5240
06:17
I need to return the favor.
145
377360
1160
06:18
I need to give them a compliment.”
146
378520
1340
06:19
But, wait until you notice something you really do like and say, “Hey, actually, I love
147
379860
4119
06:23
blah, blah, blah.”
148
383979
1000
06:24
Alisha: Yeah, I think that's a great point.
149
384979
2011
06:26
When you can sense whether someone is being sincere or not, what is your next strategy
150
386990
4720
06:31
for continuing an English conversation?
151
391710
2140
06:33
Michael: Well, “don't be afraid to open up.”
152
393850
3770
06:37
I like this one.
153
397620
1000
06:38
I think this is good.
154
398620
1060
06:39
A lot of people will be kind of shy.
155
399680
1700
06:41
They won't open up too much.
156
401380
1789
06:43
Again, within your comfort zone, but I like this one because people return the favor.
157
403169
5031
06:48
Because if you're just having small talk and you say, “The weather is nice today.
158
408200
4460
06:52
Blah, blah, blah,” you can only go so far.
159
412660
2069
06:54
So, don't be afraid to say something personal.
160
414729
2151
06:56
Again, trust your judgment.
161
416880
2000
06:58
Don't be a creeper.
162
418880
1759
07:00
We don't want to hear certain things about your life.
163
420639
1991
07:02
Alisha: Don't be a creep.
164
422630
1219
07:03
Don't be weird.
165
423849
1651
07:05
Don't be strange.
166
425500
1649
07:07
Like what you're saying about opening up, “open up” is just a phrase that means
167
427149
3291
07:10
“share something about yourself.”
168
430440
1830
07:12
It can be as simple as what you did last weekend or what you're going to do this weekend or
169
432270
5049
07:17
a project that you have coming up.
170
437319
1881
07:19
It doesn't mean that you have to spill all of your life secrets to the other person but
171
439200
4570
07:23
just showing that you're willing to share something more personal about yourself can
172
443770
3780
07:27
help ingratiate yourself or can help the other person understand you a little bit better.
173
447550
7590
07:35
That's a good tip.
174
455140
1580
07:36
I like that tip.
175
456720
860
07:37
That's hard to do, though.
176
457580
900
07:38
It's hard.
177
458480
940
07:39
It's a little bit scary, I think, to share parts of yourself, but it's good.
178
459420
1880
07:41
But it's a good way to meet people and make friends.
179
461300
2540
07:43
Alright.
180
463850
1000
07:44
I think that's all.
181
464850
1000
07:45
Is that all that you have?
182
465850
1000
07:46
Michael: Yeah, that’s all I got.
183
466850
2350
07:49
Alisha: Okay.
184
469200
1000
07:50
Those are some interesting strategies to keep an English conversation going, so give them
185
470200
4149
07:54
a try.
186
474349
1000
07:55
If you're ever at a loss for words and don't know what to say, you can try one of these
187
475349
3130
07:58
strategies, and hopefully, it will help you out.
188
478479
2461
08:00
Please let us know if you have any other strategies or anything else that you would like to use
189
480940
3610
08:04
or you try to use when you are having trouble keeping a conversation going.
190
484550
4179
08:08
Leave us a comment and let us know what it is.
191
488729
2681
08:11
We will see you again next time.
192
491410
1310
08:12
Do you have anything else you'd like to add?
193
492720
2000
08:14
Michael: That's about it.
194
494720
960
08:15
Alisha: Alright!
195
495680
540
08:16
Thanks very much for joining us and take care.
196
496320
3020
08:19
Bye-bye!
197
499340
640
About this website

This site will introduce you to YouTube videos that are useful for learning English. You will see English lessons taught by top-notch teachers from around the world. Double-click on the English subtitles displayed on each video page to play the video from there. The subtitles scroll in sync with the video playback. If you have any comments or requests, please contact us using this contact form.

https://forms.gle/WvT1wiN1qDtmnspy7