Sound More Professional and Confident! (In 30 Minutes!)

Welcome back to JForrest English Training.

I'm Jennifer and today you're  going to learn how to sound  

more professional and confident  when speaking English in public.

And I'm going to share 10 bad speaking  habits that you need to avoid.

Let's get started.

The first bad habit is using one word answers.

Let's say you were at a conference and  your boss asked you how was the conference  

and you reply back and you  say good, great, awesome.

What do you notice about these answers?

They're all one word answers.

Now, it might seem a little comical  that that's all you would say,  

but I hear this from students all the time.

I'll ask them about their vacation and they  were on a two week vacation in another part  

of the world and all they say was good,  great, OK, not bad, very short answers.

This doesn't sound very professional and you  definitely don't sound advanced in English.

That an easy way to solve this problem  is to answer in a complete sentence.

Repeat the question.

The conference was good.

Now, still, this isn't enough information.

You can then expand on that and  you can provide the reason why  

or you can provide one example  from the conference or the trip.

The conference was good because I met a lot  

of new people in my field and  I have a lot of new contacts.

This sounds so much more professional  and advanced compared to good.

Our next bad habit is using weak words.

Let's say your boss asks you if  you can have the report finished  

by the end of the day and you  reply back and say I think so.

I'll try.

These are all weak words because they imply that  

you might not finish the  job or finish the request.

So instead of saying I think I can  change that to something more confident,  

something stronger, I know I can finish  the report by the end of the day.

I promise I'll finish the  report by the end of the day.

You can count on me to finish  the report by the end of the day.

The next bad habit is using very basic words.

Basic words like good, OK, fine.

All of these are very beginner  words and they don't sound very  

professional and they don't make  you look very confident either.

So if you simply change that  to something more advanced,  

instead of saying the conference was good,  you say the conference was very beneficial.

And then you can move on and  provide more information like  

we talked about in the first bad habit.

Because often the one word answers that you  want to avoid are also very basic words.

One bad habit you definitely want  to avoid is speaking too quickly.

So imagine right now I'm telling you about the  rules of something and I'm speaking very fast.

Do you think you'll be able to understand  very well if that's how I spoke?

Well, a lot of students actually think they speak  too slowly, but in my experience that's not true.

They actually speak too fast.

And when you speak too fast, it's difficult  to understand, to follow your story.

So just take a breath, put some  pauses into your words as well,  

and that will help you slow your pace.

Now let's talk about word fillers.

Word fillers are those words like, well, you know,  like these words that don't have any meaning,  

but people add them to their speech when  they're trying to think about what to say next.

So imagine you're in a meeting and your  boss asked you to tell everybody about how  

the project is going and you reply back and  say, well, the project's going pretty good.

Well, you know, we just need to.

Obviously that doesn't seem very  professional and you certainly won't  

feel very confident when you have all those arms.

Let's talk about eye contact.

This can be a very difficult one,  

especially because culturally people  have different rules for eye contact.

In North American culture, it's considered  polite and professional to make eye contact  

with the person you're talking to, but you  don't maintain eye contact 100% of the time.

You can absolutely look away, look down,  

look up, but you want to maintain  by contact at least 50% of the time.

Next, let's talk about intonation.

Intonation is the natural raising  and falling of your voice.

Our voices do this naturally.

Now, if I'm way up high and then I come down  low and then I go way back up high and then I  

come down low, that's not very professional  and it won't make you look very confident.

But you also don't want to talk on one  specific note and maintain that note.

Right now I probably sound more boring to you  because I don't have intonation in my voice.

That's the impact of not having  that natural rising and falling,  

and I hear this from students all the time.

So you could do some vocal exercises and try  to go up higher and then calm down lower and  

just try to vary your intonation,  which is the rising and falling  

of your voice when you speak to sound more  professional and to appear more confident.

Our next bad habit is on enthusiasm  and a lack of enthusiasm.

What do I mean by this?

Well, let's say you went to this  conference and you want to tell  

your boss and your colleagues that  the conference was very beneficial  

and you learned a lot and you  made a lot of useful contacts.

But if you deliver this, if you  communicate this without enthusiasm,  

they're not going to understand the message.

The conference was great.

I met a lot of people.

It was very beneficial.

It was really interesting, a lack of enthusiasm.

Your intonation goes down, your volume goes down.

Just think of it as being very  tired or bored or not interested.

So think about the enthusiasm  that you have in your voice now.

Part of showing your enthusiasm and part of  being confident is also your body language.

Notice how I said when you lack  enthusiasm, it's like you're tired.

When you're tired, you have a  hard time keeping your body up.

But it doesn't look very professional, and I  probably don't look very confident right now.

And same people, often they speak, they cover up  their body, which makes them appear very small.

That doesn't seem very confident either.

When you're confident, just  bring your shoulders back and  

take up about as much space as your shoulders go.

Think of that as your box, your communications  box, and that's where you want to be.

You want to make sure you stay upright  in this box when you're communicating,  

because that will make you seem very confident.

And then also that will help with  your intonation and your enthusiasm.

Because when your body is all crunched down, it  actually impacts the intonation of your voice.

And when you're upright more,  you can get more enthusiasm,  

more intonation from your voice as well.

So remember shoulders back and pay  attention to your body language.

Now finally, let's talk about hand gestures.

So hand gestures is just simply using  your hands when you communicate.

Now there are some things you don't want to do,  like completely not having any hand gestures.

So if I did the entire video like this,  maybe you could watch it for 30 seconds.

But imagine watching it for 10 minutes  where you don't see my hands at all.

Now if my hands are like this,  most likely my body is going to  

start to to sag as well and I'm not  going to have good body language.

But when I bring my hands into it, I'm  more likely to keep my shoulders back.

Remember I said you want to have a  communication box because you also  

don't want your hands wailing and frailing  about and just being all over the place.

As well, you want to keep your hand  gestures within this communications box.

So just keep them very slight, very natural.

You don't want to go too far  away, just close to the body,  

but just keep them going and that will  again help you with your body language.

It will make you look a lot more confident  and you'll appear more professional because  

all professional speakers use  their hands when they're speaking.

And if you avoid these ten bad speaking  habits, I know you're going to look  

instantly more professional and you're  going to feel more confident as well.

So which bad habit do you think  you need to improve the most?

Share that in the comments below.

Do you get nervous right before you're  about to speak English and public?

Maybe your hands start to shake,  or your heart starts racing,  

or you get that feeling in your stomach.

Does that ever happen to you?

Well, don't worry, because in  this video we're going to talk  

about how to not get nervous speaking  English and public in any situation.

But before we begin with my 5 best  tips, I just want you to know one thing.

It's totally normal that reaction that you get,  that physical reaction is absolutely normal.

Did you know that public speaking is the number  

one fear in the entire world And  that's in your own native language?

So you can imagine how much  more difficult it is when  

you're speaking in a foreign  language in front of people.

So first of all, just know  there's nothing wrong with you.

It's totally normal to have that reaction.

Now let's talk about the five  tips that you can use to feel  

confident and not get nervous  when you're speaking in public.

Tip #1, the first thing that  I want you to do is relax.

Now, when I say I want you to relax,  I'm talking about your physical body.

I want you to physically relax your body.

Because when we're nervous, when  we're under stress, we also tighten.

We tighten up our body, but did you know  that it has been scientifically proven by  

the medical community that you cannot feel  stress if your body is physically relaxed?

So just relax your back, relax your arms, relax  this area of your chest and stomach as well.

So just relax, relax.

But I want you to still maintain  good posture because it isn't very  

professional to be hunched over in a bad position.

Although it is very relaxing  to do something like that.

So you need to relax your body, but still maintain  a professional position for when you're speaking.

So that's tip #1.

Tip #2 is to use positive visualization.

Because let me guess.

When you think about speaking in public,  not that you're actually speaking in public,  

but when you just think about speaking in public,  most likely a negative image comes to mind.

You imagine the audience judging you  because you made a grammar mistake,  

or judging you because your accent is too thick.

Or you imagine yourself forgetting all  your words and not knowing what to say.

You imagine yourself not being  able to answer the question.

You imagine yourself feeling really nervous  and not confident and doing a bad job.

Well guess what?

Do you think having all of those negative images  

in your mind are going to help you  feel confident going into a situation?

Isn't it just a normal reaction that  you would feel stress and nervousness?

If you anticipate something negative  happening, that is your body doing its job.

If you have a negative image in your  mind and your body reacts negatively,  

everything is working properly.

That is what your body is meant to do.

So one thing that you can do is  to change those mental images.

Change them to successful images.

Imagine yourself opening your mouth and  having the words flow out confidently.

Imagine the audience cheering for you  and telling you you did an amazing job.

Imagine yourself standing in front of that  audience, feeling confident and feeling proud.

Now, do you think you would have  a different feeling in your body  

if you had all of those positive  images instead of negative images?

Well, of course the answer is yes, so you  need to work on your positive visualization.

Tip #3 is to focus on your  audience and not yourself.

Now when I use the word audience,  

I'm not talking about 100 person Ted  talk, although that may be the case.

Your audience could be one person, your boss,  your coworker, your friend, a hiring manager.

It could be just one person.

But a lot of students, when  they go into a real situation  

and they're going to be speaking,  they're focused on them themselves.

They're focused on their accent, their  English, their feelings, their emotions.

But aren't you forgetting the reason  why you're public speaking anyway?

You have a message to share, right?

Maybe your message is simply updating  your boss on the status of the project.

Maybe your message is explaining  to the hiring manager why you  

would be the perfect choice for the position.

Now, if you go into a situation and  you're only thinking about yourself and  

you're not thinking about your audience,  well, that's kind of selfish, isn't it?

And when you think just about yourself is  going to be more likely that you have all  

of these hesitations and negative  thoughts and judgments and fears.

But if you put all your focus on your audience,  

then you're not focusing on your English  skills or your fear, your anxiety.

And if we don't put focus on something,  it will just not actually minimize.

So if we don't focus on our anxiety and our  nervousness and we focus on the audience and  

the information you want to share with that  audience, your message, well then you're going  

to just feel more relaxed, less nervous, And  your audience is going to really appreciate  

the attention that you're giving them, and it's  going to make them think that you really care.

So it's going to help you feel less nervous and  

also help you impress your  audience at the same time.

Tip #4 is to structure your ideas.

Imagine you needed to go to a job  interview in a different part of town,  

a different part of your city  that you've never been to before,  

and you get in your car and you don't  have a GPS and you just start driving.

Are you going to feel a little bit nervous,  A little bit nervous that you might get lost,  

a little bit nervous that you  might not get there in time,  

a little bit nervous that you have no idea where  you're going or how you're going to get there?

Well, of course you would feel  nervous in that situation if  

you were going somewhere new without a GPS, right?

Well, if you go into a situation where you're  public speaking in a meeting, in a job interview,  

giving a presentation, and you have no idea  how you're going to begin, how you're going  

to transition to your next idea and how you're  going to end, you're going to feel nervous, right?

Is the same situation trying to  get to a location without a GPS?

Well, in this situation, when we're talking about  public speaking structures, simple structures are  

going to help you get to your message in  a very easy way, in a very organized way.

Just like a GPS helps you get to your  destination in a very easy to follow way.

So a simple structure that you can use is you  need an introduction, a body and a conclusion.

If you go into a job interview and you know  how to start your answer and you know how to  

end your answer, that's already going to make you  feel a lot more confident and feel less nervous.

And if you know what to put in  the body of your answer as well,  

and you can do that in any situation,  you can have a simple introduction,  

body conclusion for anything you're  asked, even in a social situation,  

when you're telling your friends about what you  did last night or your upcoming vacation in.

Any situation you're communicating,  

you don't want to just open your mouth and  see what comes out, because most likely  

what comes out isn't going to be very good and  that's going to make you feel very nervous.

But if you open your mouth and you  have a clear beginning, middle,  

and end, and you know how to transition  from the beginning, middle and end,  

then you're going to feel confident  and you're not going to feel nervous.

And tip #5 is to practice, practice, practice.

Now When you go into a job interview,  of course you should practice.

Many people practice the day before the night  before as they're driving to the job interview,  

and obviously you're going to feel nervous.

If you've only practiced once or  twice, you need to practice again.

And again and again and again and again.

If you feel a lot of nervousness, that's  probably just your body telling you that  

you haven't prepared and  you prepare by practicing.

Now some nervousness is natural and will always  be there even if you do practice and prepare.

So you're not looking for 0 nervousness,  but you are looking for a low level of  

nervousness where it doesn't impact your  message and you can practice any situation.

You can practice answering  questions you weren't expecting,  

and then when you're asked a  question you weren't expecting,  

you'll feel confident because of all  the practice you've done in the past.

So if you want to feel confident, it's absolutely  going to come from practicing and preparing.

Let's say you're in a meeting at work and you  have this amazing idea that you want to share,  

and you open your mouth and you start speaking.

And as you're speaking, you  just can't think of that word.

You have a very specific word in your head,  

and at that exact moment when you're  speaking, it's not coming to you.

This is something that I hear  from students all the time,  

and it's one of the reasons that a lot  of students will avoid speaking because  

they're afraid that is going to happen,  Either because it's happened in the past,  

they've heard stories of it happening to other  people, or it's just a fear that they have.

But here's what you need to know.

It is normal.

It is normal for you to be speaking and not  remember a word, not remember an entire idea.

This is normal even if you practice what  you wanted to say, and you practice,  

and you practice and you practice, and then you  get to the point where you're sharing your idea.

Maybe it's in a job interview  or at work in a meeting,  

and you're speaking and you're  speaking and then you forget.

You forget the word that you just  spent hours and hours practicing.

Why does that happen?

Well, you just have to realize that  for one, your brain is not Google.

OK?

I think a lot of people have this  expectation that their brains job  

is to give them the precise piece of  information the moment they want it.

Now that would be amazing  if the brain could do that.

And our brain is capable  of doing incredible things.

But it does not work the  same way that Google works.

When you want some piece of information, Google  or Siri will give you that information instantly.

Your brain is not like that.

Your brain has all that information, but  it doesn't have a filing system that it  

can just open a file and take that  piece and give it to you on demand.

That is a limitation.

So you need to understand that this is normal.

You have to think about this  in your own native language.

Are you telling me that you've never been speaking  

in your own native language and  forgotten what you wanted to say?

Forgotten the name of a movie?

The name of a restaurant?

The name of a street, The name of a coworker,  

And you know their name, but just at  that exact moment you can't remember it?

Are you saying that doesn't happen  to you in your native language?

Well, of course not.

Of course it happens to you  in your native language.

So why wouldn't it happen to you when you're  speaking in English as a second language?

The best solution I can offer you is to have  strategies in place when you forget your words.

So I want to tell you about one of my  students in my program, Speak to Impress.

Now, this is a public speaking program.

So my students practice their  public speaking and they learn  

strategies to help them share their  ideas effectively and impressively.

So one of my students was talking  about her favorite Disney movie.

Now as she was talking, she couldn't  remember the name of the Disney movie.

A lot of times students will  just use a lot of word fillers.

They'll get really stressed out, or they'll just  stop talking because they forget a specific word.

But remember what I said.

You need strategies.

So this student was able to keep talking.

So she forgot the name of the movie.

She instantly started talking.

Oh, I can't think of the name of the movie.

What's that name again?

Anyway, it doesn't matter.

So as I was saying, so she talked for a little bit  

to give her brain some time  to think of the information.

The information was not  coming, so she had to move on.

She had to keep going.

And that's what my students learned.

They learn to have these problems,  like forgetting their words,  

and they learn how to overcome them with  specific strategies so they can keep talking.

So you just need to have some strategies in place  

to help you keep talking when that situation  happens, because that's a normal situation.

It is going to happen.

It's going to happen when you're in a meeting is  going to happen when you're at a job interview,  

is going to happen when you're giving a  speech at a networking event or a conference.

It's going to happen.

When you're at a party just socializing  with friends, you cannot stop talking.

You have to keep going.

So you just need to have some  strategies to help you keep talking.

So ultimately you can just relax  because that is a normal situation.

But there is one thing you need to understand,  

and that's that our brains don't work  as effectively when we're under stress.

So if you have a fear of public  speaking and before you go to speak,  

you're already nervous before  you begin the presentation,  

before you go to the job interview, your  heart is racing your hands or shaking.

You have that feeling in your stomach.

At that moment, your body  is under a lot of stress,  

and in that stressful environment,  your brain doesn't think as clearly.

Your brain is under stress at that  moment, So it's going to be more  

difficult for you to organize your thoughts  and think clearly and get the words out.

Just think about how you feel when  you didn't get a good night's sleep.

Let's say you had a terrible night's sleep.

You only slept two to three hours, and  you're you're in a meeting in your own  

native language and you're asked a question and  you've only had two to three hours of sleep.

You are not going to be able  to articulate your ideas very  

clearly or effectively because  your brain isn't working properly.

It's only had two to three hours of sleep.

Now, that exact same thing is true  when your body is under stress.

So it's really important that you learn  to control your fear of public speaking.

It's very normal to have  a fear of public speaking,  

but you need to take action to  minimize those negative emotions.

I'm not going to tell you that  you're going to eliminate them 100%,  

but you can absolutely minimize them.

You can minimize the nervousness,  the heart racing, the handshaking.

You can reduce it and minimize  and minimize and minimize,  

and with enough practice you can  get it as close to 0 as possible.

And when your body is not under  stress, your brain is going to work  

more effectively and it will be able to give you  the information that you need when you need it.

So first of all, understand that it is normal.

Even when you're not under stress, your  brain does not operate like Google.

But understand that when your body is under  stress, because you're having a negative  

reaction to public speaking, your brain is not  going to work as effectively as if you were calm.

One strategy that I can offer you to overcome your  fear of public speaking is to use your breath.

So take big breaths in, so big breasts  in hold, and then a big exhale out.

So take it in for three to five seconds,  

hold it for two to three seconds, and  then exhale for five to 10 seconds.

And when you take those big  breaths in and big breaths out,  

your heart rate is going to slow  down because your body is in stress.

You need to get your body  back into a calm environment,  

and you can do that with your breathing.

So before you go to the job interview,  

just sit in your car or go to the bathroom  and just do some breathing exercises.

Or let's say it's a few days before the job  interview and you're thinking about it and you  

get nervous just thinking about it, and your  heart starts to raise at that exact moment,  

do some breathing exercises  the second you have that fear.

Obviously you can't do that in the middle  of the job interview while you're speaking.

You can't do that, right?

I think that's obvious.

I don't need to tell you that.

So you have to do this as a preventative  before you go into the event, and that that  

will just help your body stay in that calm,  relaxed state so you can think clearer.

Another reason why you forget  your words when you speak is  

because you're thinking too much about your words.

You're obsessing over your English, and you're  thinking too much about individual words.

And you're forgetting the  purpose of communications.

The purpose of communications is to share an idea.

You should not be thinking about the  individual words that you're going to use.

You should be thinking about your overall  message that you want to communicate,  

and then focus on your message.

Because there are many, many, many different ways  that you can communicate a message in English.

But I find that students,  when they're public speaking,  

they forget that they're not in a classroom.

When you're at work and you're in a  meeting and you're sharing your ideas,  

you're not in a classroom.

In a classroom, you might be required  to practice specific verb tenses or  

to practice a specific phrasal  verb that you've been studying.

And when you share a practice  example in a classroom setting,  

you have to practice that specific phrasal verb.

But when you're in the workplace environment  and you're communicating and let's say you  

want to share an idea and you want  to share it with that phrasal verb,  

but you can't remember that phrasal verb.

If that's what's happening, then you've  forgotten the purpose of communications.

You've forgotten why you're there.

You're there to share an idea.

Whether you share that idea with a  specific phrasal verb or a different word,  

a synonym of that phrasal verb, does  not matter in the classroom, It matters.

In the real world, it does not matter.

You should not be thinking about individual words,  

individual verb tenses, individual  phrasal verbs, individual expressions.

That is not your goal.

Your goal is to communicate a message.

So if you focus on the message,  

then you won't worry about what words  you use to communicate that message.

So the only thing you need to do as a solution  is you just need to focus on your message.

Focus on your message and remember that there are  

1020 a hundred different ways  to say the exact same thing.

So you may have wanted to  use a specific phrasal verb.

Who cares?

There are many other ways you can  communicate the exact same idea.

And remember, you're not in English class.

Your boss, the person interviewing you, doesn't  care about your phrasal verb vocabulary.

They care about your ideas.

They care about the value that  you can bring to the organization.

They care about the solutions that you provide.

Divide.

That's what they care about.

They don't care about your English.

So stay focused on your ideas and  remember you're not in English class,  

so now you know why you forget your words.

And you also have some very simple strategies,  strategies that you can use starting today to  

overcome this problem, so you can share  your ideas effectively and impressively.

And if you found this video helpful,  

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