30 Signs You’re Secretly BRITISH! | Easy English 72

Hello, welcome to Easy English.

Over the past few months  I’ve given you loads of tips

on how to integrate yourself into  Britain and the British culture.

But, what if you already show  the signs of being British?

How would you know? I’m going  to give you some of the symptoms

that would reveal that you are  in actual fact secretly British,

here we go!

Number 1:

Worrying you’ve accidentally  packed 3 kilos of cocaine

as you enter customs.

Number 2:

Not Being able to stand and leave without saying:

Right.

Right.

Right.

Right.

Number 3:

Not hearing someone’s name for the third time,

so just pretending you have.

Hello, whats your name?

(Inaudible)

Whats that sorry?

(Inaudible)

Again sorry?

(Inaudible)

…

Yep.

Number 4:

Saying: ''anywhere here’s  fine'' when the taxi’s directly

outside your front door.

It’s the last house on the right.

Anywhere here’s fine.

Number 5:

Being sure to start touching your  bag 15 minutes before your station,

so the person in the aisle seat  is fully prepared for your exit.

Number 6:

Repeatedly pressing the door button on the train

before it’s illuminated, to  assure commuters that you have

the situation in hand.

Number 7:

Having someone sit next to you on the train,

meaning you now have to eat your crisps at home.

Number 8:

Tickets please!

The huge sense of relief after  your perfectly valid train ticket

is accepted by the inspector.

Okay

Number 9:

The horror of someone you only half know saying:

''Oh I’m getting that train too''.

Number 10:

Loudly tapping your fingers at the cashpoint,

to assure the queue that the money is coming

and the wait is out of your hands.

Number 11:

Looking away violently when someone  nearby enters their PIN number.

Can you enter your PIN please

Number 12:

Waiting for permission to leave  after paying for something

with the exact change.

Here you go.

Thank yo… - Okay bye.

Number 13:

Bumping into to someone in the supermarket,

Oh hey, how's it going?

then creeping around to avoid seeing them again.

Number 14:

Sitting in quiet disappointment  as you receive a different haircut

to the one you requested.

Really good thank you.

Number 15:

Being unable to pay for something  with the exact change without saying:

''I think that’s about right''.

Number 16:

Being unable to turn and walk  in the opposite direction

without first taking out your  phone and frowning at it.

Number 17:

Finding it necessary to do  a little run over the road,

whilst giving an apologetic mini wave.

Number 18:

Oh, excuse me, you just dropped this.

Punishing people who don’t say thank you by saying

''you’re welcome'' once they’re out of sight.

You’re welcome.

Number 19:

The frustration of finding a  cup of tea you forgot about.

Oh s**t!

Number 20:

Then necking your tea like  a massive, lukewarm shot.

Number 21:

Discovering you’ve got a hundred  pounds worth of plastic bags

under your kitchen sink.

Oh dear.

Number 22:

Oh hey, come in,

Saying:

''You’ll have to excuse the mess''

to signify you’ve spent seven  hours tidying in preparation

for their visit.

Number 23:

Would anyone like the last potato?

Indicating that you want the last roast potato

by trying to force everyone else to take it.

No, you have it.

You have it.

You have it!

I want you to have it!

Number 24:

Saying:

Right, I best be going to bed.

Which translates to ''I’m off to stare at my phone

in another part of the house''.

Number 25:

Leaving it too late to correct someone,

meaning you must live with your new name forever.

Hi, what's your name?

Oh hi, yeah, it's Mitchell

Great! See you later Richard.

Nah, it's actually…

Number 26:

Running out of ways to say thanks  when someone lets you pass,

having already deployed:

''Cheers''.

''Thanks''.

And

''Ta''.

Number 27:

Changing from ‘kind regards’ to  just ‘regards’, to indicate you’ve

reached the end of your tether.

Number 28:

Staring at your phone in silent horror

until the unknown number stops ringing.

Number 29:

Easy English.

Hearing a recording of your own voice and deciding

it’s perhaps best never to speak again.

Eurgh!

Number 30:

The relief when someone doesn’t answer their phone

within three rings and you can hang up.

Yes!

And an extra one:

Filming an entire fireworks display on your phone,

knowing full well you’ll  never, ever watch it again.

Thanks for watching this weeks video,

let us know if you’re showing any symptoms

or any other ''Britishisms'' and  then we’ll see you next week, bye.