The 10 Best INSULTS from SHAKESPEARE

Out, thou scurvy wretch.

No, I'm joking.

Look, today we are looking at Shakespeare's insults.

Who is this lesson for?

Well, if you're a competent English speaker already, then this lesson could be quite enjoyable

for you because you can have some new insults up your sleeve.

If you are an ESL speaker, then you're going to learn some interesting uses of English.

Now, I just wanted to point out that 400 years ago when Shakespeare died, so just a bit before

that when he was doing his plays, going to the theatre was a very different experience.

Outside you'd probably see some bear-baiting; there'd be all sorts of misbehaviour going

on inside and outside the theatre.

It's not quite the same as what going to the theatre is like today, which can be quite

formal.

Right.

Let's start off.

A Midsummer Night's Dream.

That's the other thing I wanted to say to you, that his plays are divided into three

categories.

So, we have tragedies where lots of people get killed and die; we've got comedies which

are hopefully funny; and we have histories which are typically about war, for example,

Henry V.

A Midsummer Night's Dream, this is a comedy.

Comedies all come together at the end; it's a happy ending, but things go disastrously,

badly wrong before that.

Midsummer Night's Dream, this is about lovers who the wrong person loves the wrong person,

and it's all a bit: "Oo, oo, oo", so the fairies have to get involved and put magic potion.

"I am sick when I do look upon thee.

I am sick when I do look upon thee".

"Thee" just means "you".

Okay?

"I am sick when I look upon thee."

Nice and succinct.

With all of these insults, you'll find that Shakespeare is a true wordsmith.

There is an enjoyment at the language, at the sounds, at the words.

Everything just seems quite complete in these insults.

"Villain, I have done thy mother."

Quite what he means by "done" I will leave to your imagination, but something quite bad

has been done.

Judging by the play, Titus Andronicus, which is all about rape, and murder, and bloodshed

- it's probably not a very pleasant thing.

"Thou art a boil, a plague sore" from King Lear.

So, King Lear, it's about this old man who's dividing his kingdom up between his three

sisters.

Sorry.

Between his three daughters.

"Thou art a boil, a plague sore".

"Art" here means "are"; "thou" means "you".

"You are a boil", you know, like a nasty thing on your face.

"...a plague sore", so this was a time where horrible diseases were going through the population.

"A plague sore", so a sore, like a nasty kind of infected spot.

Lovely.

Really nice image, there.

Taming of the Shrew: "Away... away, you three-inch fool".

So, here, we are giving the idea that the person is short; in some department, at least.

Timon of Athens: "I'll beat thee, but I would infect my hands."

So a slightly alternative use of the conditional tense, here.

We would probably now say: "I would beat thee, but".

"I'll beat thee.

I will beat you, but if I did that, I would infect my hands; I'd get some disease."

So, you're... you're so disgusting that I'm not even going to bother beating you up.

Again, from Timon of Athens: "Would thou wert clean enough to spit on".

So, if you were clean enough, I would spit on you, but you're so disgusting that my spit...

you're not even worth receiving my spit.

"Would thou", "Would you"; "wert", "if you were... if you were clean enough to spit on".

"Would thou", "I wish you were clean enough for me to spit on you."

Henry V, so some really fantastic speeches in this play.

Cry God for Harry, England, and Saint George.

If you want to learn some really sort of arousing patriotic speeches, Henry V is the place to

go.

But this one more of an insult: "Thine face is not worth sun burning".

So: "thine" meaning "your".

"Your face is not worth sun burning."

Okay?

It's not just me who thinks you're ugly; the sun, the stars, the moon think you're ugly,

too.

Henry IV: "Thou art as fat as butter."

Butter... pure butter obviously being 100% fat.

"Thou art as fat as butter", or close to it.

"Thou art as fat as butter."

We're also using a simile here, so we're comparing his... the fatness of the other person to

butter.

From As You Like It: "I desire that we be better strangers."

So, what we're expecting to be said here is: I would love to get to know you better, but

what is actually said is: "I desire...

I want that we be... that...

I hope that we can be better strangers; that I never really see you again".

"I desire that we be better strangers."

And, lastly, from Macbeth: "It is a tale told by an idiot, full of sound and fury, signifying

nothing."

So, this would be an insult you would use if someone's told this ridiculous story.

Maybe they've been exaggerating a little bit too much, and you think it's just a bad story.

You would say: "It is a tale told by an idiot", so the person telling the story - you're an

idiot.

Full of sound and anger, and loudness, but it actually means nothing.

Your story's silly.

Okay, let's go over these one more time to make sure we have got them exactly right.

So I'm going to say it, and then you repeat after me.

"I am sick when I do look upon thee."

Obviously you're not being sick when you look on me, are you?

Good.

"Villain, I have done thy mother".

"Thou art a boil, a plague sore".

"Away, you three-inch fool".

"I'll beat thee, but I would infect my hands".

Okay, keep repeating after me: "Would thou wert clean enough to spit on".

"Thine face is not worth sun burning".

"Thou art as fat as butter".

"I desire that we be better strangers".

"It is a tale told by an idiot, full of sound and fury, signifying nothing".

Now, if you want to learn how to tell a really good story, then watch my video on how to

tell a great story.

Enjoy these words.

Use your whole mouth and expression to tell them, and enjoy using them.

Until next time, press "Subscribe", and see you in the next video.

Good-bye.