Professional English Communication: Invitations, Small Talk, and Thank Yous

Hi there, and welcome back to engVid.

My name's Benjamin, and in today's lesson, we're going to be looking at a formal style

of English to make invitations and respond to invitations.

We're also going to be looking at small talk,

good topics of small talk, and things to avoid.

And we're going to be looking at how to make

a... or to write a thank you letter after

an occasion.

Specifically, the source material for today's

lesson has a context of corporate entertainment.

Now, for those of you who are not familiar

with what this is, it's kind of halfway between

a social occasion and straight out business negotiations.

It's a way of companies trying to woo their clients by taking them to some of the best

things available.

For example, sports events, the opera, going

out on a yacht, yep, giving them a really

good time.

Now, there is such a thing as the Briberies Act, which is in place both in the UK and

the US, so there's a thin line to negotiate as to what is acceptable and what is not.

But I'm more focused on teaching the English phrases, so let's dive straight in.

So, as I've mentioned, you could be invited or inviting to one of the most premium, top

of the range events available, so it's important

that any invitation is written exceptionally

well, that it stands out, that the quality of the event is reflected in the style of

communication in the invitation.

So, if it's an email, it could be an email, it

could be a paper, a written or typed invitation.

I'm going to be looking at an email to start

with, so you want to make sure that the subject

line of the email is very clear what the invitation is to.

So, don't just write "invite to football", like, what is it, "down the pub to play a

five-a-side football", "opportunity to join

us in the director's box at Stamford Bridge,

November 6th", something like that.

Okay, going into the main body of the email, what do we need?

We need to know what the date is, yep.

Now, there are different conventions of how to write the date, so just make sure that

you're following the right date convention for the country that you're in, in terms of

does the date go first or the month go first.

I cover that in another video.

We need to know what the start, time, and

finish is, so your guests, your invited guests

can plan their day accordingly.

What is the occasion, yep, and you're going

to need to sell it a bit, so why is this such

an amazing thing to go to?

I've put an example sentence here, "I do hope

you will be able to join us for what is surely

one of the most", and then we need an adjective,

"prestigious, famous, sought-after days in

the racing calendar", or "anticipated", yep.

If you anticipate, then you wait for, so an

anticipated event is lots of people are waiting

for it, okay?

So, "I do hope you'll be able to join us,

we, the company, for what is surely", adverb,

"one of the most", adjective, "in the racing

calendar", adjective and noun, prestigious

events or anticipated or talked about, okay?

So we try and sell the occasion.

The location needs to be really clear.

How do they get there?

Is there parking?

Most people I know in London don't actually have

a car because they rely on public transport.

If going by public transport, where's the nearest station?

How do they get from the station to the actual event?

And then they need to know how and when to

RSVP, French for "Respondez-vous plus", yep,

you need to give an answer.

How do they give their answer?

And then at the end, you might want to sort of

finish it off with something kind of personal

to them, like, "I know last time you didn't put the bets on the", "I hope you have more

luck with your bets this time", if they're going to a horse racing event or hopefully

the right team wins, if related to who supports football teams or...

And then you need to sign off, so, you know,

"Hoping to see you on such and such a date

with best wishes", and then your name, okay?

So, it's kind of...

It's quite friendly with best wishes.

If "Kind regards" is a little bit too cold for something you're inviting someone to,

I would say, but these are all negotiable.

Okay.

We need to accept or refuse, decline an invitation.

If you're going to decline the invitation, you can say, "No, I'm really sorry."

You could say, "Thank you so much for the very kind invitation to..."

What event have you been invited to?

Before that, you're going to need to write

"Dear", so whoever you are writing to, yeah?

"Unfortunately, on this occasion, I or we will not be able to join you as..."

And then you need to give a reason, as unfortunately, we already...

We have "prior".

Let's write that down.

"Prior" means before commitments.

It means I'm already doing something.

We already have prior commitments, or we have a client visit on that date, yep?

Some sort of good, valid reason.

I do hope the day is a great success and that, again, make it personal to the event

that you've been invited to and that you have...

And that you watch an absolute thriller of a

game, a really exciting game, or, you know,

try and make it unique, personalize it.

Now, we need to change this a little bit if we are accepting.

So, let's have a look at how we would change it if it was a "no".

So, now it's no...

It's not "unfortunately", because we've got good news.

We can come.

We can come to this event.

So, let's go straight to there, and let's see how it reads.

"Thank you so much for the very kind invitation to Ascot on the 12th November.

I'm pleased to say that I, or we, are, or am, let's say we are, I am, able to attend

and I'm very much looking forward to it.

Then, if you have any questions about the

event, that would be the right time for asking

a question, and then sign off, saying goodbye, with very best wishes.

Da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da."

Okay.

So, we've done the invitation, we're going,

date's in the calendar, now we need to prepare

the kind of things we might be talking about

to some potentially influential people.

The small talk is absolutely vital, because it establishes whether someone is going to

like you, whether they're going to carry on

wanting to have any kind of association with

you, and then even to the possibility of doing business, but that's a long way down

the line, and you should never be thinking about it when you're making small talk.

You just want to be trying to create an enjoyable experience for the other person.

It's something you can plan for, so think about the kind of occasion you're going to.

Think about who's inviting you.

You could even, if it's a social occasion, you can look on Facebook.

Who's been invited to it?

Who are these person's friends?

If it's a business context, then think, well,

who are the key clients of this particular

business?

What kind of interests are they likely to have?

And then just think about some of the conversations you might have.

Avoiding, I've said down here, avoiding politics,

religion, money, and anything really personal.

So, you want to be looking at having conversations

that are not particularly serious, passing

conversations, until you find that conversation,

that area of interest where the conversation

flows.

For example, last night, I'm filming this in Toronto, in Canada, and after ten days

of not having too much contact with human

beings other than my esteemed colleague behind

the camera, I decided to venture out, and I went to a social of other people from the

UK who were in Toronto, and at that occasion,

the conversation struggled a little bit to

begin with, with one or two of them, until with two of them, I found that we had this

shared interest of football, and once we started

talking about football, we were away, like

there was no stopping us.

But it's just, you know, finding out what kind of things they are interested in.

Research and prepare, yep.

Last night, I was very much with a group of people who were interested in football, not

rugby, so I quickly had to ditch the rugby conversations and focus on football.

Now, if you were like me last night, and you're

going somewhere where you knew no one, you

have to take the initiative.

You have to be confident and lead and start and open conversations.

Introduce yourself.

Hey, I'm whatever your name is, nice to meet you, what's your name?

And find out why they're there, and keep the conversation going.

If you're talking about something boring that

becomes painful, change the conversation.

You want to have approachable body language, yep.

Not just looking at a phone, yep, if you're looking at a phone, then it signals to not

talk to that person.

So, put the phone away, yep, and be open to the environment in which you are in.

Okay, in terms of a little bit more detail about the things to talk about, so you can

make statements and questions about the immediate environment and context.

For example, have you ever been here before?

So, the context that I was in yesterday evening

was British people in Toronto, so you could

ask them about that context.

How long have you been living here for?

Do you live in this part of town, because it's a big city?

Have you ever been to one of these events before?

Talking about corporate business entertaining,

how long have you known this company for?

Have they ever taken you here before?

The weather, passing comment can be a bit boring, so you don't want to bang on and on

and on about the weather.

Yeah, we get the idea, it's raining, yeah, okay, it's cold, okay, you can't talk about

it for too long.

How did they get there?

For example, last night, there was a group of people that had been at another event,

and they were catching the bus to where we were.

So, one of the questions I could ask was, did you go to this other event?

And then that starts a whole conversation.

Was it good, or if they hadn't been to it, so yeah, you're like me, you've been busy

today, and you can start a conversation about what you've been doing today.

Keep the conversation on them, yep?

Be interested in the other person, and keep

it positive, oh, that's great, oh, that sounds

really interesting, that's good.

Think before you speak, especially if you've

been entertained, and the entertainment has

been quite generous, maybe you have had a

couple of glasses of wine, it's more difficult

to think before you speak, obviously, if you're

a child, then you're not drinking, so this

is not a problem for you, so do try and check

yourself before you talk to make sure that

you're not going to say anything that's going

to upset them, and you're not going to ask

a question that's too personal, or go into

a conversation where you feel uncomfortable.

As I said, these are the topics to avoid, because we're trying to create connection,

not disconnection, and people have strong views on these topics.

Even if you're speaking to someone who you find a little tedious, yep, not your cup of

tea, you still need to have good manners,

yeah, you still need to listen to that person,

obviously, you might be thinking, at some

point, I would like to go and talk to someone

else, but you need to have the grace to take

an interest in that person, and not rush the

exit, so, you know, not just walking off,

like saying, oh, well, that sounds absolutely,

you know, fantastic, that sounds a little bit

insincere, well, it's been very interesting

finding out about such and such, and I hope

that goes really well, it's been really nice

talking to you, I'm just going to have to go

and go to the bathroom, or whatever, yeah,

so closing conversations before you move on.

Hopefully, with those small talk skills, you will

have had an enjoyable, successful, constructive

event, and now we're going to look at how to say thank you after the event.

Now, there are some that would say that it

should be the host following up after a business

event to make sure that the guests had, or have enjoyed whatever they were doing, but

I think it's good manners to thank a host whenever you've been hosted.

On that subject, if you would like to thank

me, the channel, for putting content, useful

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I suggest going to the www.engvid.com website,

because you can then select what type of videos

you want to see from me, so I've got sections

on business English, idioms, writing, vocab,

exam English, so you just select there which

are the ones you want to watch most, and also

there are other teachers there who are excellent.

Okay, so how do we say thank you?

Dear, person's name, I just wanted to thank you for a fantastic day at...

Where did you go?

Maybe it wasn't today.

Maybe it was a meal.

Maybe it was...

So, you might need to change that.

Last...

When was it?

Last Tuesday?

Last Thursday?

You should always try and do a thank you

letter as soon after the occasion as possible.

It can appear...

Well, the person might be waiting for a thank

you letter and think you're rude if you wait

too long, and it's also fresher in your mind and easier to write soon after.

The hospitality was first class.

Now, "hospitality" is a formal word, and you

wouldn't use this if you were thanking someone

for a meal with their family or something.

You would probably make a specific comment on the dish that you had.

The apple crumble was absolutely delicious.

The...

And now I'm starting to think about the actual

entertainment, so the football match was absolutely

riveting, and I thought the result was probably

about fair, but such a pleasure to be there.

Thank you.

I very much enjoyed speaking with...

This is optional; you don't have to say that.

It might not be relevant, pertinent to put it in.

And it was...

Maybe this is about them, and it was also very interesting to hear about...

Maybe the host told you about a business project they were doing.

So you at least pretend or show an interest in that because they have, you know, paid

out for you to have a nice day.

I do hope...

Now this is about sort of future plans.

What are you going to be doing next with that person?

I do hope we will be able to see you, da-da-da-da-da, as planned.

Thanks once again.

Best regards.

Okay.

Quick review.

Dear, person's name.

Thank them for...

Where did you go?

When was it?

Talk about the food and the drink.

Talk about the event.

Who did you enjoy speaking with?

What did you enjoy speaking about with the host?

What are you going to do next?

Thank them again.

Best regards.

This is business semi-informal.

You wouldn't so much use that in a social context.

Okay.

To remind yourself of some of the content

from today's video, you can do the quiz, which

will pop up below, and I look forward to seeing you in the next video.