💔💔💔 Are we falling out of love with marriage? ⏲️ 6 Minute English

Neil: Hello welcome to 6 Minute English. I'm Neil.

Rob: And I'm Rob.

Neil: Now Rob, Can you complete this

saying: "Love and marriage go together

like"...

Rob: Love and marriage go together like...

a horse

and carriage!

Neil: That's right, and when was the last

time you saw a horse and carriage?

Rob: Well that would have been quite a while

while ago - they're quite rare these days.

Not an everyday sight.

Neil: Indeed. And according to recent

statistics,

marriage in the UK is getting rarer too.

Not as rare as seeing a horse and

carriage, but

the numbers are falling. Before we look at

this topic in a bit more detail, a little

quiz for our listeners.

Rob: Yes, according to UK's Office for

National Statistics, how many opposite-

sex marriages were there in 2015?

Was it: a) 239,000

b) 309,000 or, c) 339,000

Any idea Neil?

Neil: I have no idea but I'm going to have a

guess and say a) 239,000.

Rob: We'll reveal the answer a little later in

this programme. And whatever the

correct number,

the trend is downwards. Year on year

there are fewer opposite sex couples

getting married in the UK.

Neil: So why might this be? Are we falling

out of

love with marriage? Let's hear from a

couple of people with different views.

First, here's Tom from BBC Learning

English - what doesn't he like

about the idea or concept of getting

married?

Tom Banks: I'm not that enthusiastic

about the idea of

marriage, to tell you the truth. I think it's

a bit of an archaic concept these days and

I'm a bit of a commitment phobe - I don't

like the idea of signing a piece of paper

that says I have to be with someone for

the rest of my life and can never escape

from that person I suppose - although I

am in a very happy relationship at the moment.

Rob: So that was Tom there. Not a fan of

marriage.

But what were his objections Neil?

Neil: Well he described marriage as an

archaic concept.

When someone describes something as archaic

they think it is very old fashioned, out of

date - belonging to a different time.

Rob: So that was one of his problems

with marriage,

but he also said that he was a

commitment phobe. The suffix phobe

means someone who

is afraid of something. In some cases it

can also be used as a standalone word,

but it means the same. So a commitment

phobe is someone who is afraid of, or

doesn't like the idea of commitment.

Neil: And when talking about

relationships, commitment

means being with one person and giving

up the idea of being free to do whatever

you want and see whoever you want

romantically.

Rob: So for commitment phobes,

commitment means losing something.

Neil: But that's not true for everyone.

Here's Dan, also from BBC Learning

English. What's his view of marriage?

Dan O'Brien: In general I think it's quite

good. It has a very stabilising

effect on society and it declares publicly

to the world that you have

found the right person for you and that

you're in a committed relationship.

Rob: So Dan is a fan. He thinks marriage

has a stabilising effect on society. He

sees marriage

as being good for society as a whole - it

makes society stronger, more stable.

Neil: And he also sees it as a way to say

to everyone

that you have a strong relationship, you

are with the one person you love.

Rob: So for Dan, commitment and being

in a committed

relationship is a good thing.

Now, back to our question at the top of

the programme. I asked how many

opposite-sex couples

got married in the UK in 2015?

Neil: And I took a guess, didn't I, and I said

a) 239,000. Am I right?

Rob: You are definitely right. The answer is 239,000

or 239,020 to be precise. That figure was

3.4% lower than 2014. So what do

relationship experts think is the reason

fewer people are getting married?

Neil: Well, there could be lots of reasons.

in some countries the way society is

changing means that there is less

pressure to get married

or stay married. As a result, there are

more divorces. So perhaps children of

divorced parents are less likely to get

married themselves.

Right, well before we go, let's recap the

vocabulary we highlighted today. The first

word was trend.

Rob: A trend is the direction that

something is

changing over time. When it comes to

marriage, the trend is for fewer

marriages. And the

trend for 6-Minute listeners is the

opposite - going up, particularly when you

are presenting Neil.

Neil: Ah, that's very nice of you, you're very

kind. The next two words were an archaic

concept. Archaic is an adjective for

something dated or old-fashioned.

Rob: A bit like your fashion sense!

Neil: Just when I was beginning to like you!

Rob: Sorry about that, you know I don't

mean it. In the interview archaic was used

to describe the concept of marriage, not

your fashion sense. Concept is another

word for an idea or belief.

So an archaic concept is an old-fashioned

idea.

Neil: Our next expression was

commitment phobe.

We use this phrase to talk about someone

who is scared of the idea of a long-term

relationship because they see it as giving

up some freedoms.

You're obviously a compliment phobe!

You're afraid of saying nice things about

someone so you always say something

nasty as well!

Rob: I said I was sorry.

Neil: And finally we had the adjective

stabilising.

Something that is stable is strong and

something that makes something strong

can be described as stabilising.

Dan expressed his belief that

marriage had a stabilising effect on

society.

Well, that's it for this programme. For

more, find us on Facebook, Twitter,

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course our website at

bbclearningenglish.com where you can find

find all kinds of other activities, videos

and quizzes and things to help you

improve your English. Thanks for joining

us and goodbye!

Rob: Bye!