The science of falling in love ⏲️ 6 Minute English

213,829 views ・ 2024-08-01

BBC Learning English


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Hello. This is 6 Minute English from BBC Learning English.
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I'm Neil. And I'm Beth.
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"Head over heels".
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"Butterflies in the tummy".
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"The apple of my eye". In English,
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there are many idioms to describe what it feels like to fall in love.
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Aw, I didn't know you were such a romantic, Neil.
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But do you know what's actually happening
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in our brains when we fall in love? Because I'm sorry to say this, Neil,
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but it's more about brain chemistry than romance.
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Specifically, hormones – chemical messengers which the body releases
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into the blood to control our growth, mood, and yes, falling in love.
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Thanks for ruining my romantic ideas, Beth!
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And since my dreams are now shattered, why don't we spend the rest
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of this programme finding out exactly what is going on inside our bodies
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and brains when we fall in love?
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And of course, learn some useful new vocabulary too.
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There's no doubt that being in love has the health benefit of reducing stress,
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even lengthening your life.
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But the hormones
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which the brain releases have an immediate effect as well.
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So, chemically speaking, what happens when lovers look into each other's eyes?
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Is it a. their body temperature increases, b. their heartbeats harmonise,
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or c. the hairs stand up on the back of their neck.
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Hmm. Is it all three? No.
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OK then. I'll guess it's b. their heartbeats harmonise.
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OK, we'll find out if that's correct at the end of the programme.
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According to Helen E Fisher, self-help author and anthropologist
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at Rutgers University, there are three aspects of romantic love.
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Here's BBC ideas to explain more. Often
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lust comes first, but not always.
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For some people who are asexual, it may not happen at all.
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But for those who do experience lust, it's driven by the hormones estrogen
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and testosterone.
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It may feel purely carnal,
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but in fact it's about the urge to mate and pass on your DNA
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via offspring. Without lust,
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it's fair to say our species would not survive.
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Helen Fisher thinks the first aspect of love is purely physical. Lust -
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the strong feeling of sexual desire for someone.
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Lust is driven by the hormones estrogen in women and testosterone in men.
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A few people are asexual, meaning they don't feel sexual attraction
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for anyone of any gender.
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Lust is hardwired into us through our DNA and it drives us to have children.
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Helen thinks
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it's fair to say that without lust, our species would not survive.
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Here she uses the phrase
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'it's fair to say' to introduce an idea she believes to be true and reasonable.
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Of course, love is not just physical.
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Here's BBC ideas again to introduce Helen Fisher's second aspect
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of love – attraction.
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The second aspect of romantic love
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is attraction, influenced by a neurotransmitter called dopamine.
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This is a feel-good substance released in our brain
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that is involved in driving us towards reward.
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Do something,
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get a dopamine hit,
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feel good.
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Eventually, dopamine will push us towards repeating that behaviour.
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This is why intense attraction feels like an addiction
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to another human being.
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Some people get stuck in that loop,
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always chasing the dopamine-soaked excitement of a new relationship.
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This time, the hormone responsible is dopamine – a neurotransmitter
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that rewards our attraction to someone with pleasurable feelings.
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That's why dopamine is called a feel-good substance.
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The adjective feel-good can be used to describe anything causing happy
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and optimistic feelings about life – things like feel-good films
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or feel-good music.
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Here, though, there's a downside.
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The dopamine hit of sexual attraction feels so good we crave it more and more.
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Some people are always chasing the next relationship to get a new hit
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of pleasure, and soon become stuck in a loop – an idiom meaning
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they're unable to break the habit of repeating the same patterns
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of behaviour over and over again.
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It's fascinating to see the power which hormones have over us,
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but if you're an old fashioned romantic like Neil, don't despair.
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And speaking as a romantic, how about the answer to my question? Right.
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You asked me about the effect on the body
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when two lovers look deep into each other's eyes.
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I guessed it was that their heartbeats harmonise.
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Which was... the correct answer! In experiments,
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looking into the eyes produced hormones causing couples hearts to beat in time.
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OK, let's recap the vocabulary we've learnt in this programme,
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starting with the idiom 'head over heels' – to be completely in love with someone.
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'Lust' is a very strong feeling of sexual desire.
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Someone who is asexual does not feel sexual attraction
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towards anyone of any gender.
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The phrase 'it's fair to say'
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is used to introduce a statement you believe to be true and reasonable.
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The adjective 'feel-good' describes something which makes people feel happy
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and optimistic.
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And finally, the idiom 'stuck in a loop' describes someone unable
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to break the habit of repeating the same negative patterns of behaviour
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over and over again.
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Once again, our six minutes are up,
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but remember to join us again next time for more topical discussion
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and useful vocabulary here at 6 Minute English.
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Goodbye for now. Bye!
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