How to join group conversations smoothly: Top tips from Tim Ferriss

You're at a networking event and you see a group of people in conversation and

you want to try to join their conversation.

Does that sound really scary yet? It is. It does sound really scary,

but it doesn't have to be. And in today's lesson,

I want to share it with you some surprising and very

practical tips from an entrepreneur that I admire very much,

Tim Ferris. Let's go. Hi, I'm your English coach Christina,

and welcome to Business English with Christina,

where you can grow your business and grow your level of English.

Today I'm gonna share with you some great ideas from an episode of the Tim

Ferris podcast that I have listened to multiple times because it is

just has so much good advice in it. Uh, the episode is, uh,

I think the title is How to Build a World Class Network in Record Time

by Tim Ferris. And it's the kind of solid,

unique,

original business advice that you can access if you have a level of

English that allows you to do business in English.

And now maybe you can't listen to the entire episode and understand everything

because it's li, it's Tim Ferris. It's like two hours, three hours long,

but there is a transcript with it. And in today's video,

the idea is for me to help you understand the key

ideas so that you can use them for your business,

but maybe also so that you can go and listen to that

original podcast and understand it better. All right,

let's get into it. Now,

what I love about Tim's perspective on networking is

that it's, it's very manageable. Like anyone can do it. There's no,

um, you don't have to be this magic extroverted,

professional networker. What I don't think professional networkers exist.

I don't know, maybe they do. Um, anyway,

he makes it very manageable for normal people like you

and me. And here's what he has to say.

You don't have to meet everyone like a robot.

You just need one good human connection with someone who can change your

life. And, you know,

that's great news for those of us who maybe network in a foreign language

or maybe just don't really enjoy meeting

tons of people in one event. And you know,

if we're worried that, you know,

maybe we won't have the right thing to say or seem like the most intelligent

person in the conversation, that's okay. As Tim says,

ignorance is bliss.

It means that you don't have to know everything.

And often maybe not knowing everything can make you a little happier.

And it's definitely can work.

In networking. In fact, you know,

a lot of people think that maybe in networking they have to go in

and like show their expertise and show how much they know.

But in fact, that can stop the conversation because I mean,

nobody wants to talk to somebody who knows everything. Um,

so if you're, you know, let's say taking this approach, ignorance is bliss.

You're going into the conversation with the mindset of,

I want to learn. I'm not here to show people how much knowledge I have.

I'm here to learn from others. And that means other people,

you know, they like to share their knowledge. Um,

so ignorance is bliss.

Don't feel like you have to impress people with your knowledge.

And I also love, you know, Tim's rules for networking.

The first one is don't dismiss people.

Treat everyone like they're important because they are. Now,

don't dismiss people. It means like,

don't assume that they are not important or that they can't help you

or that they don't have something interesting to share. You never know.

And networking is all about trying to discover that.

And the second rule is don't rush. You know, like he said,

you don't have to meet 50 very useful,

interesting people.

You just need to make one solid human connection and that can change

your life. Okay, so now that we've, you know, talked about all of the,

the mindset stuff about networking, um,

and how to approach it,

how do you approach a group of people who are already in a

conversation? Like,

it's almost like it's this fortress and you have to like get into the fortress,

but it's really a lot easier and a lot simpler than it sounds.

So here is Tim Ferris's technique with a few expressions that I

have added for you, you know, from, uh,

let's say one entrepreneur to another who has to network in a foreign language.

First,

if you see like two people and they are deep into a conversation,

don't interrupt them. It's probably not the moment. Uh,

and they might be talking about something, you know,

very specific to their business or a partnership or whatever.

But if you, I mean, use your best judgment,

um, when to approach a group and when to find maybe

another group to approach the best group conversations.

Probably have maybe three or four people because it probably means

that, you know, they're talking about something a bit more general.

So when you find a group that you do want to approach, the first thing is to,

you know, just approach them, um.

Slowly and just kind of come in,

make some eye contact so that they welcome you into the group

and then, you know, listen for a while. But then, you know,

ask them if you can be a part of their conversation.

And Tim Ferris recommends something like this, Hi there,

I'm new here and I don't know anyone yet.

Do you mind if I just hang out here and listen in on your conversation?

I mean, it's kind of impossible for them to say no to your polite

request, but it's just always nice to ask out of politeness.

And of course,

it can be just a little strange if you come up

to a group conversation and you kind of stand there and you don't say

anything. Like that's just the people are like, Who is this strange person?

Don't do that. Okay, now you remember that advice of don't rush.

So this is where you want to take the time to

truly listen to the conversation that is happening between the

other people.

And then when something that just catches your interest or catches your

attention,

that's the moment to ask a question so that you can become a part of that

conversation. Now, okay, so what questions do you ask? Well,

if you know you're listening and one person talks about an important

choice that they made to work with, um,

like a a web developer for their company, you can say something like,

Now I'm not in tech,

so I don't know much about how to pick the best developer,

but I'm curious why was that person the best choice? Remember,

the goal is to ask questions that encourage people to keep

talking and to include you in the conversation,

not to show how much you know, or I don't know,

maybe the person is in the coaching industry and they talk about

that they have just started offering their program,

their coaching program in English for the first time.

You could say something like, So I have a question.

I'm not in the coaching industry, but I'm curious,

what made you decide to start offering coaching in English?

Notice that these questions,

they refer back to something that was previously mentioned

in the conversation.

So they're directly relevant and they don't, you know,

you're not giving your advice or you're, you're not giving or imposing,

let's say,

your opinion on something you're asking to know more about,

you know,

why they made that decision or why they did something or how they did it. Um,

you're trying to get the conversation going but not centered

around you. Now, you may want to, you know,

be in a rush to get to, let's say, the,

the part where you can find out if there's a business opportunity or a new

client for you.

But Tim Ferris is really serious about taking this idea

of not rushing the conversation because nobody likes, you know,

someone who's just there to pitch their services or try to get

new clients.

So be patient as you participate in this

conversation, most likely at some point,

someone in that conversation will say like, Hey, what do you do exactly?

And you can give just a short answer.

You don't have to talk about everything that you do.

Here's the example that Tim Ferris would give, um,

if he were in this situation. Uh, I'm new here,

I just published a book and I can't figure out how to promote it.

So I'm trying to solve that problem. Now,

I really like this introduction for a couple of reasons. First of all,

it is a way of talking about the product or the project

or, you know, something that you're working on at the moment in your job,

but without, you know, being, um,

arrogant about it. Let's say, um, he says, you know, Oh,

I'm working on this book, or I just finished this book. Um,

so the people know what you're doing. But then he also, you know,

is a little humble about it and says, You know, I'm,

I'm not sure how to promote it. I'm trying to find, um,

some ideas or some solutions. So again, saying like,

I'm doing this thing so now you know what I'm working on,

but I also know that I don't know everything and here's a problem that

I'm trying to solve.

And then that means that the person listening to you can

take the conversation in a lot of different ways.

They might ask for more details about, you know,

your project or the book or whatever you're working on. Um,

so you can tell them more about it. If you're trying to solve a problem,

maybe they have an idea or maybe they know someone

who can help you.

So it's like you come away with something very useful and very concrete,

as I always say, if you don't use it, you lose it.

And here is how you can immediately use what you've learned in

today's episode. Try making your super short introduction.

Start with something about the project that you're working on or what you

have just finished. And you can start with I just,

and then fill in your answer here. It can be something like, I just, um,

started a company. I just launched a new product. I, um,

just started testing, I don't know, um.

YouTube shorts, for example. Uh,

whatever you have just done or just started working on.

And then say what you're trying to figure out next. So you can say,

and now I'm trying to figure out, for example,

um, I'm trying to figure out how to promote my business,

how to reach a wider audience, how to, um,

find more clients, whatever.

But that's the main structure and you can put that in

the comments. Of course, your answer will depend on your business,

on what you're working on, all of that.

But this is the opportunity to practice and to try out

this super short introduction that is fantastic when you have

to go and network in a group conversation. All right,

and if this lesson was helpful for you, I would love to know,

and there are three ways that you can tell me.

You can subscribe to my channel and give this video a thumbs up

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And you can go ahead and watch this next lesson,

which is all about how to sound more advanced in English.

So maybe to help you get a little more confidence when you're going to

approach people in a group. And of course,

thank you so much for learning with me and I'll see you next time.