The Unique Love Between Humans and Dogs | Elias Weiss Friedman | TED

Cloe Shasha Brooks: Elias, thank you for joining us.

Elias Weiss Friedman: It's my honor to be here.

CSB: You have a very popular platform, The Dogist.

On Instagram alone, you have 7.6 million followers,

so you bring a lot of joy to a lot of people around the world.

And in your photographing of dogs, you also tell stories in the caption.

So I’ve noticed a theme throughout these captions

about the deep love people have for their dogs,

sometimes in ways that seem to exceed the love they might even have for people.

Can you tell us about the uniqueness

of the relationship between dogs and people that you've noticed?

EWF: Yeah. I've photographed something like 50,000 dogs

in the last 11 years, all around the world, mostly in New York.

But one of the sentiments and stories I hear most often is this idea of, like,

unconditional love.

And the common thing is, like, "I've had a hard day.

I'm stressed out, someone cut me off in traffic.

And I come home,

and my dog is looking at me like this, and it all washes away."

And so that's, like, a really powerful thing.

And dogs are so, you know, generous with their love.

And they're also really generous with their eye contact.

You know, that's something I try and capture, this directness.

But like you're saying,

it's a more simple relationship than we have with people.

You know, if I come home, Elsa is there to greet me,

and she wants a belly rub.

And, you know, Sam, my fiancé, is also there to greet me.

And generally, she goes, "Hey, honey."

But maybe she's had a day or, you know, I left the towel on the bed again.

You know, it's not as simple as it is with the dog,

who just looks at you like this.

That's my dog, Elsa.

She's a rescue from Texas.

She wishes she could have been here.

CSB: So in your travels,

you've photographed dogs all over the world.

And I've noticed, in your writing,

that you note the differences in cultures about how people relate to dogs,

based on where you are.

So will you tell us about some of your most favorite cultures,

around dogs?

EWF: I think there's a universal thing around dogs.

That's one of the great things about my job, is I can travel anywhere.

You know, just yesterday, I was walking around Atlanta,

meeting people and their dogs.

But there's some trends, like in LA, the dogs are in people's cars with them,

so they spend even more time with their dogs.

You know, I've traveled around the world.

Like, that last image was in the UK, a dog called Tuppence, at a pub.

And I just thought that was, like, a quintessential thing

that you don't see quite as often in the States,

hopefully more often.

The next picture, I think, was taken in Maine,

or this is in Pisa,

but there's this universal thing, where I can travel anywhere,

I could go to Antarctica and find a dog,

and relate to someone, and connect with someone.

You know, if I'm photographing people,

they may not be as interested, because, like, "What's this about?"

But as soon as I start talking about their dog,

they're like, "How do you want him?

Let me get the eye boogers out."

This was kind of a funny one.

I was in Croatia, and they often have these, like, town dogs,

that are just roaming around the entire time,

while you're, you know, out having dinner.

And I asked a local, like, "What's this dog?"

He’s like, “That’s Žuti,” which means “yellow” in Croatian.

I was like trying to get a picture of Žuti, and I captured him.

You know, maybe he lives in one place, but he wanders around.

The whole town is his. Yes.

And this was in Switzerland, obviously,

at the Saint Bernard Museum.

That was a fun trip.

And one of the things I gleaned from that trip

was, like, in places in Europe, in Switzerland,

they take dogs very seriously.

Like, to become a breeder,

you need to, like, go to a dog training class or something.

And I appreciate that.

Sort of, like, they're part of our family.

Whereas I think, in the United States,

sometimes, we feel like there's no rules about breeding,

and that's why sometimes, there's overpopulation.

CSB: Right. EWF: Yeah.

CSB: Let's talk about service dogs for a moment.

So anytime I go to the airport and I see a service dog,

I cry.

And in a good way,

because I just think it's so amazing that they can do work for us

in such a crazy environment.

But they have so many other functions, they do so much for people,

and there's so much research about post-traumatic stress disorder

and other mental health conditions.

I imagine you've met a lot of folks

who have really benefited from service dogs,

so we'd love to hear some stories.

EWF: There's all types of service dogs, like the therapy dogs at the airport,

guide dogs that guide visually impaired people.

But I've done this series over the years

with this organization called America's VetDogs,

and they raise and train lab mixes for veterans,

and they often have PTSD.

This is a series I did with this woman named Sharon and her dog Eddie,

and it sort of started as this typical, you know,

I’m meeting this woman at her house, and we’re going to chat.

And I get there and, you know,

she's demonstrating the different things Eddie can do.

And he'll do nightmare interruption.

If she's having a nightmare,

he'll nudge her awake or pick up her keys or turn the lights on.

And that's all, like, typical. And she was normal.

And she was an RN, she was a nurse in the Army.

And so she has seen people at their worst, you know,

and it's hard to come back and just forget that or reintegrate.

But it wasn't until later in the day

that I went to the headquarters of America's VetDogs

and spoke with the president,

and she was like, "I heard you met Sharon." And I was like, "Yeah, I did."

And she was like, "You know, when she came to us,

she was nonverbal and shaking."

Sorry, chokes me up, sometimes, talking about this.

But, you know, Eddie, her dog, made her the way she is now,

and it's so transformative and powerful.

She was on, I'm sure, all types of drugs,

and it didn't work as well.

And she came across as someone who was articulate

and thoughtful with her dog,

and her dog empowers her that way.

Later in the day, I met Nathan.

Same program, America's VetDogs.

He was a retired veteran from the Air Force.

He was in charge of, as he called, "nukes," the nuclear division.

And as you can imagine, like, in that role, you have to be,

like, perfect all the time.

If they ask you "Are you good?"

"Yes, sir, I am good," even if you're not good.

He was describing it as he became robotic,

and it dehumanized him.

And when he retired, it's like, how do you just reintegrate?

And it was really hard for him.

He was completely asocial

and wouldn't leave the house,

and America's VetDogs offered him this dog and this training program.

And, I'm sure, you know, there are multiple factors.

But now, he's a public speaker, like, the opposite of what he was before.

And it's like, how do you pinpoint --

it's, like, hard to quantify what the power of a dog is,

but it's real.

CSB: Yeah.

EWF: And, you know, it's amazing.

So this is my buddy Angus, and, you know, he's not a veteran.

He's not a visually impaired person,

he's not someone who automatically, you would think,

qualifies for a service dog,

but he's someone who, like,

has serious trouble with anxiety and depression

he’s had for a long time.

He’s on all types of drugs, which have all types of side effects.

And he, you know, came to me,

he's like, "What would you think if I had a dog?"

And I think that, you know, that'd be a great idea.

And we sort of left it at that.

And then, I get a call. He's like, "I'm at the airport.

I'm flying to Wyoming to meet a potential service dog for myself."

You know, he found some breeder that specializes in it.

And, you know, a month later, this dog arrives.

And this is, like, the first moment that they'd met.

And, like, there's no person you just meet and stare at them

so deeply in their eyes --

(Laughter)

... and have this, like, instantly powerful effect.

And you know, he loves this dog, and he’s never alone anymore.

And you know, he's single, and he goes on dates,

and sometimes, the dates don't work.

And he would have this, like, fear and this spiral

of going home to nothing and not being OK and feeling rejected.

And he was telling me, like, now, with Opal,

he doesn't have that fear anymore.

It's like, "If it doesn't work out, you know, I'm good.

Opal is going to be there waiting for me, and she's probably hungry.

And I'll take her for a walk."

Like, it's the opposite of this spiral.

CSB: It's beautiful. EWF: Yeah.

EWF: And this is back at the VetDogs headquarters.

This is Maggie, who's a facility service dog.

So instead of having one handler, she helps with lots of people,

like in a hospital or something.

And I was just having, like, a regular Tuesday,

in whatever mood I was,

and taking pictures of Maggie, learning about her.

I did, like, a nightmare interruption.

And she said, "Do you want Maggie to give you a hug?

She's a big hugger."

And I said, "OK, yeah, sure."

And I get down on my knee,

and she comes up and just embraces me in this really, like, trained way.

It's not like a dog jumping up on you.

But instantly, I felt like my emotions,

like, my day was completely different.

It was, like, this powerful force of happiness,

and I didn't realize that I needed it, before.

But Maggie made me realize that I did need it.

CSB: That you were not in the best mood, perhaps.

EWF: You know, like, whatever mood you're in,

they're going to enhance it, you know?

CSB: It's awesome.

So you grew up with a lot of dogs,

and you started The Dogist --

Yeah, there's baby Elias. So cute.

And you started The Dogist in 2013,

and you didn't have a dog then, because you were like,

"I need to travel and take these photos."

And so when you finally did get a dog, recently, last few years, right?

How has that changed your perspective on your work?

EWF: Yeah. I mean, it was sort of like my little secret.

Like, "The Dogist doesn't have a dog."

(Laughter)

And I sort of decided that I needed to travel and meet other people's dogs.

I had dogstalgia.

You know, I'm single, I'm not ready for a dog.

But then during the pandemic, I decided to foster, and I met Elsa.

She came up from Texas, and she was amazing.

Like, she campaigned for my heart, and she won.

(Laughs)

And I was like, "Well, you know, it's time for me to grow up a bit."

And, you know, I fell in love with her.

You know, a lot of people say, like, they open another chamber of your heart.

And she did, and she, you know, deepened my appreciation

for other people's relationships with their dogs.

You know, it's like, it's hard to know, unless you have your own dog,

like, what that feels like.

You know, when I got Elsa, my fiancé and I got engaged.

CSB: Congratulations.

EWF: You know, it was just sort of, like, a catalyst for love, you know?

CSB: That's awesome.

Well, may we all feel the kind of love that Elias feels with Elsa.

Thank you so much for joining us, Elias.

EWF: Thank you.

(Cheers and applause)