The Benefits of Not Being a Jerk to Yourself @TED #shorts

At any given moment, we humans have two choices

or two spirals that are available to us.

The first is the toilet vortex.

The toilet vortex might start like this.

You're picking on yourself because

you don't like the way you look in the mirror.

You're unhappy with your level of productivity

or you have failed to achieve ketosis, whatever.

And then you take that out on other people

and then you are feeling more miserable,

and then down you go.

The vastly superior alternative is what

I call the cheesy upward spiral.

As your inner weather gets balmier,

that shows up in your relationships with other people.

And because relationships are probably

the most important variable when it comes to human flourishing,

your inner weather improves even further

and up you go. And that is the whole point here.

Self-love, properly understood, not as narcissism,

but as having your own  back, is not selfish.

It makes you better at loving other people.

And that makes you more generous and more available.